Sweet like cinnamon
by zelzai
Summary: This is what happens when your father, who by the way is a stupid racist bastard you want nothing to do with, pisses off some biker club… You get kidnapped.
1. Welcome to destruction

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

"SHUT UP," Tig yelled through the wall that was separating them from a tied up screaming girl in the back of the van.

"We should have drugged her or something," Juice said, glancing around worriedly as they were waiting for the traffic light to turn green. "Do you think people can hear her from the outside?"

"Probably," Tig eyed their surroundings cautiously while stirring up the radio's volume.

"I don't like this.. what we're doing," Juice started, turning halfway toward Tig, "she's innocent in all this."

"But her old man is not and it's the best way to get that son of a bitch out of hiding," Tig shrugged. "What that bastard did to Gem, he will pay for that, one way or another."

Juice knew that look on Tig's face. There was no mercy.

"I know, just feel kind of bad for the girl," Juice finally muttered through tight lips.

...

"Fucking hell," Lexi had tried practically everything to get herself free from the ropes tied around her ankles and wrists. However, the only thing she had succeeded at getting rid off was the fabric keeping her mouth shut. The car stopped occasionally, but even then she was pretty sure no-one outside either heard her screams, or even if they did, cared much about that.

"SHUT UP," an angry voice yelled through the wall.

"Why god why do these things keep happening to me?" she gave up trying to get free and rested her head on the cold and slightly vibrating wall. Well actually she hadn't been kidnapped before, but it had been a bad year nonetheless. She had caught her boyfriend in bed with her best friend… a guy friend, then a few months later she had managed to crash her car into a tree and had since then been forced to take a bus to work. "Well at least I get a day off," she mumbled with irony. She had just been on her way to the cafeteria from the bus stop when two guys came out of nowhere and dragged her without an explanation into the back of their black van. The one who had tied her up had some crazy looking eyes, that was all she could see and remember, as they were both dressed identically as someone who were planning an old-school bank robbery.

Eventually the car came to a halt again, only this time she could also hear them getting out as well.

The door keeping her from freedom was still slammed shut, but she could hear more than two voices moving towards it. The door wast then slowly opened and as her eyes adjusted to the daylight, she could see four guys looking her way. They were all wearing black leather vests and sporting the perfect bad boy image. The crazy-eyed guy came inside and picked her up saying, "If you kick and scream, I will _make_ you stop."

Luckily that was not going be a problem. She was scared out of her mind and couldn't make a sound even if she wanted to.

She glanced around as the curly haired guy carried her into what looked like a sweet wooden cabin in the woods... although in this situation it looked more like something that serial killers used for dissecting their doomed victims. The guy placed her on a chair and removed the ropes keeping her hands and feet in place. "Now I suggest you don't try anything, if you do, I'm forced to think of a more fun way to use those ropes," he said with a coy smile, "Understand?"

"Ye..yes," she nodded, trying not to visibly shiver at the mere thought of what he was implying to. What the hell did they even want with her? She had lived quite a peaceful life, until this day at least. The guy winked at her, the same smile still on his lips and turned to leave. With that he revealed the back of his leather vest, covered with a big reaper and 'Sons of .. something, California'. She couldn't really read the last word that quick, but still she knew instantly what or rather who she was dealing with here. Everyone knew about Sons of Anarchy MC and about the various ways they made money in this town. Not that she was one to point fingers. Until she was old enough to support herself, she was basically living of off the same kind of money. Her father was always mixed up with illegal shit. Her father… the sudden revelation made her wince. It was all because of him, she was more than sure. It must have been. She hadn't even seen him for over a year and yet the things he did caught up with her. It had just been a matter of time.

...

"I let her loose, she ain't got nowhere to go," Tig announced walking out of the cabin.

"Juice, call Hap, say it's time," Clay ordered.

"Sure you want Hap to do this? I wouldn't be against trying to open her up myself," Tig suggested following Clay.

"I'm sure you'd love to open her up, Tiggy, and that's the exact reason I'm letting Hap handle this," Clay turned to smirk in Tig's face.

"Why don't you ever trust me with pretty things?" Tig yelled after him, as Clay made his way to the room Lexi was kept.

"Hi," he greeted her as if they were old friends.

"I'm Clay, but I'm guessing you already know that. You're probably wondering why we brought you here and why we're not hiding our identities," he sat down across from her, "you're here because of your father, you could say we need to have a little chat with him.. and about why we let you see us, well I'm guessing you're a smart girl and know not to mess with guys like us no matter what happens."

"And if you co-operate, then there's no need for us to even think about wanting to hurt each other, right?" he smiled at her.

The door opened and a tattooed head peaked in, "Hap's here."

"Great, send him in," Clay got up waiting for the one named Hap.

The door opened again and a relatively tall and tattooed figure walked in. He, like the other one, had also tattooed his head. Clay handed him what looked like a knife. No scratch that, it was a knife. _Oh no, _instantly Lexi thought of running, even as she knew that they'd catch her in a second.

"Happy here is going to ask you a few questions," Clay held on to the doorknob. "He's not so patient, so I suggest you better answer and he won't have to make you do that," he continued, looking at the knife in Happy's hands, before leaving her all alone with a guy whose mere sight sent shivers down her spine.


	2. Are you gonna go my way?

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

THANK YOU all for nice feedback! :) I'm so motivated thanks to you!

* * *

Slowly spinning the knife in his hands, Happy eyed the visibly shaking girl in front of him. She was wearing a navy blue dress that accentuated her waist and breasts. It took him a second to tear his gaze away from that basically bare chest. The way it rose as she breathed in and out with her short breaths really made it hard for him to concentrate. He was horny and she was looking so innocent and weak. He could have taken her then and there, but that was not the reason he was here, nor was it in general the way he liked to do things. Yeah, he enjoyed it rough, but not like that. Annoyed at himself for not getting a blowjob from some sweetbutt before to clear his head, he forced his eyes on the tag attached to her dress saying 'Lexi'.

Taking a step forward, he finally looked at her face. Her horror-filled eyes were glued on him, watching his every move. As if he was a wild predator circling in his prey. Indeed, more or less he was. Clay's orders had been clear- scare her, but don't hurt her, unless it's really necessary. But by the look of it, she was not the one to jump at him to try fighting her way out.

Happy was so caught up in his thoughts, that he didn't even notice the first time she spoke. "Please don't hurt me," she pleaded. "Just let me go, I promise I won't tell anyone," she continued, sinking down in her chair as he got closer.

The way her lips moved as she spoke made the situation in his pants that much harder. She didn't even realize how much her begging was turning him on.

...

Lexi stared at the guy in front of her. He hadn't said a word and the look on his face gave nothing away. It was like he wasn't even listening to her pleads, or if he was, he was doing a great job ignoring them. The way his almost black piercing eyes inspected her, made Lexi feel naked. Not that her work-dress ever really made her feel like she was respectfully covered. It was all too tight in the chest area and too short when it came to length. Still the cold stare he was giving her, made her feel as if the dress had shrunk even smaller. Giving in to the need to somehow hinder his intrusive gaze, she pulled her blonde curls up front to hide as much as possible.

"Where's your father?" he finally opened his mouth. He had a low raspy tone, that in any other circumstance she would have found the sexiest thing ever, but right now it somehow added another dimension to the level of fear she was experiencing.

"I don't know," she said in a trembling voice, "honestly, I haven't seen him over a year, I don't know what he has gotten himself into this time, but really I have no idea where to find him."

"Where would he hide himself?" he walked behind her.

"I don't know," Lexi shook her head.

"WHERE WOULD HE GO?" he raised his voice, while placing his hand on her neck from behind to force her to look up at him.

"I have no idea," tears ran down Lexi's face. She was not lying, she really had no glue about where his bastard of a dad would run to. Happy was still holding his hand on Lexi's neck, bending her head in an odd angle. "I'm telling you the truth," she mumbled through tears.

She heard the door open. However, rough hands holding her head still made it impossible for her to see, who had come to her rescue, or more likely who was going to join in on the interrogation.

"Hap, church in five," the familiar voice said, "how's it going in here, I'd like my hands on her too." As Happy let go of her, she could see one of the guys who had taken her in the first place, standing in the doorway, weirdest grin on his face.

She couldn't see what Happy did behind her, but by the way that the curly-haired guy left the room after winking at her, Lexi assumed he had nodded or done something like that.

Without looking her way, he simply strode toward the door. "I'm not done with you," his gravelly voice announced.

"You can't keep me here forever," Lexi spat out, making him turn around for just a second.

Against all of her expectations, he smiled.

...

"What's she saying?" Clay asked, pointing towards where Lexi was held.

"Not much, I'll get her talking," Happy sat down next to Tig.

"In the meanwhile, Juice has tracked down some Weston's known associates, we'll go check those out," Clay continued, "should I leave some prospects here?"

"Neh, I can handle her," Happy shook his head. Like he'd need help to keep some chick from running away… She has nowhere to go.

"Hoped you'd say that, let's get going then," Clay slammed down the gavel.

...

The windows in the room she was held in were all too small to simply climb out from. But thanks to them, she saw a bunch of guys getting on bikes as well as into the car she was brought here with. Only one bike was left behind.

Insofar, as it had been more than half an hour and no-one had come to check on her, Lexi decided it was her one chance to run away. She slowly opened the door and peaked out. She had already made a mental note before, none of them thought much of her get-away chances, as they were not locking the doors nor even keeping her tied up the hallway she could see the front door, actually she could see straight through to the front yard, as the heavy wooden door was wide open. Quietly she stepped outside.

Getting to the point where the hallway was connected with the living room, she felt her heart pick up pace. Peering over the corner, she had the view of a set of elbows barely visible from behind the back of the couch. It was the first time in life, when someone thinking not much of her abilities, had turned out to be an advantage. Who in the right mind would otherwise take a nap, while their prisoner has the freedom to simply walk out the door? She tip-toed to the doorway with ease, a victory smile looming over her as the chilly wind touched her face. Her second of happiness was crushed by the realization that she had no idea, which way she should run. Scurrying forward, her eyes stopped on the black SOA-tagged Harley. "Oh come on," she muttered out, seeing the keys sitting peacefully in the ignition.

...

Happy knew exactly where she was. She had seen her pass by on the TV screens reflection. Initially he had thought of dragging her back in right away, but he couldn't smother the curiosity. What was her next move? Would she simply run or make sure, that he couldn't follow her? Imagining himself in her position, the first move he'd done would have been slamming something heavy and sharp into the face of the person who had had the audacity to kidnap him.

She was too busy trying to figure out how to start his bike, that he had already gotten pretty close when she finally, with an audible gasp, took notice of his presence.

"Going somewhere?" he demanded, pushing her down on the bike, that she was now so vigorously trying to get off of.


	3. This is my last resort

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

"Let go of me," Lexi muttered through gritted teeth, trying to get up. Still, despite all her efforts, his strong hands on her shoulders were doing a great job keeping her in place.

"Wanted to go for a ride huh?" he teased without losing the coldness in his tone.

Lexi had stopped struggling, as he could feel her shoulder freeze. Deciding he'd had enough fun with messing with her, Happy stepped away and motioned at her to climb down. Crossing his hands, he watched her get off from the bike that chicks rarely dared to go closer than 3 feet. Slowly and cautiously she turned around to face him.

"Move," he jerked his head towards the cabin.

She didn't say a word. Instead her eyes kept bouncing back and forth between him and his bike. Taking a small step forward, she suddenly turned on her feet and pushed the bike hard enough to have it falling over. "You stupid bitch," he got a hold of it just seconds before it crashed down. It didn't help much as it was already too late to keep it from falling over. But it was enough to ease the fall. By the sound of it, only one of his rear-view mirrors shattered to pieces. He didn't have time to get it back up, as Lexi had already gotten a pretty good head start, running towards the main road. Nevertheless it didn't take him long to chase her down again.

Hap grabbed her from behind and started dragging her back. "Bad move," he growled, turning her around and throwing her shaking body over his left shoulder. He had one hand on her ass and another on her bare thigh. The feel of her soft curves helped to calm his rage. But just a little.

…

"Let me down, I won't run again," she said, realizing there was no way in hell she could get away now.

He didn't make a sound, nor did he let her go. If anything he grabbed her a bit more violently. Lexi was so aware of how he had placed his hands and how helpless the whole situation made her feel. It had probably been her only chance of getting away and she blew it, they were definitely going to kill her now. If only she'd run right away, then maybe he hadn't caught her so easily. And then the thing with his bike, yeah she caught him off guard, but in the end it had still been a bad call, for sure going to make things even worse.

He carried her straight back to the room she had come to think of as her personal prison cell. The room itself wasn't that bad, it actually had a pretty decent looking bed and a personal bathroom, but the fact that she was held there against her will, made it feel like something out of a horror movie. He threw her on the bed and moved to the bedside table to search for something. Afraid to move, Lexi watched him fish out a pair of handcuffs.

"Please don't, I won't try it again," she pleaded, getting up from the bed and backing away from him. There was not a sign of mercy in his stare. It was cold as ice.

…

Opening up the handcuffs, Happy moved across the room. He was furious, but somehow with each step he took, his rage faded, bit by bit. The way she looked at him, eyes big and watery, lips trembling, he actually felt bad. She had not asked for any of it, and yet here she was, in the hands of the Killer.

By then Lexi had backed herself up against the wall. Stopping in his tracks to tower in front of her, he reached out and grabbed one of her wrists, with that making her turn around and face the wall. The silence in the room was cut in half by the sound of handcuffs clasping shut. Hearing her silent sob, he didn't exactly feel pity, but something deep inside forced Hap to pull her against him by the hips and softly whisper in her ear, "It could be worse."

Not knowing what in the hell had gotten into him, he quickly dropped his hands and took a step back. He was the last person to console someone he was supposed to detain.

His phone rang, pulling him out of that bizarre realization. "Yea?" he said turning around and leaving the room.

"Everything okay there? Has she said anything?" voice on the other end asked.

"I'm working on it," Hap said looking at the key in his hand.

"Good. Listen, we won't make it back tonight, can you handle her, or should I send someone just in case?" Clay enquired.

"I'll handle her."

"We'll be there tomorrow then," Clay ended the call.

Thinking about how exactly he planned on 'handling' her, Happy went back inside. She didn't even look his way as he re-entered the room.

"I'll let you free. Don't try anything, cause I won't be as forgiving the second time," he freed her hands.

"You can come out when you're hungry," he said clasping the cuffs back together as he walked out the door.

…

Lexi watches his leather-cover back close the door. Her wrists hurt from where they'd been held together. She moved to the bathroom and stared at the almost unrecognizable figure in the mirror. Her hair was as messy as if she'd been spending the last hour whipping it back and forth. Her eyes were red due to the fact that they had taken on a new job as waterfalls. Over all she was looking like a human wreck. Splashing cold water on her face, she thought about her options, or rather the lack of.

After staring at the ceiling for the next half an hour, Lexi finally decided that she could at least go get something to eat, as it had been a long day, well it was actually already quite dark outside, and she had lost all hope in getting out of there anyways.

The tattooed stack of coldness was sitting on the sofa, pretending to watch TV. She could feel his freezing gaze following her every move. Lexi made herself a sandwich, while debating on whether or not to try attacking him with the butter knife. Pretty certain of the fact, that in the end she would be on the suffering side, Lexi decided to not even bother.

Holding on to the plate and a glass of water, she walked back to _her room_, wishing it was all just a bad dream.

…

It was almost midnight, when Happy decided to go check on her.

"I'm going to handcuff you to the bed for the night, so you won't get any fucking ideas about running away while I'm asleep," he stated from the doorway.

"Shut the door then," she said standing up.

"What?"

"I'm gonna get ready for bed," Lexi waited for him to shut the door. As much as she didn't want to reveal herself more than she already was, the tight dress hugging her body like glue was simply killing her.

"Whatever, don't have all night," he turned his back to her.

"Asshole," she mumbled, trying to reach for the zipper. It took some bending and jumping, before she was finally free to really breathe. Covered only by her lacy underwear, she crawled in.

Hearing the bed creak, Happy turned around. Unsuccessfully he tried not to look at her breasts while the cover slightly fell as she was trying to place her arm in a comfortable way. Her white bra contrasted perfectly with her tanned skin.

Catching his lingering stare, she quickly adjusted the covers.

"Ready," she rolled her eyes, while holding out her hand.


	4. King of demolition

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

"Is it tight?" Happy asked sitting down on the edge of her bed.

Making noise with her handcuffed hand, she looked straight in his black eyes, "Well obviously."

"No, I meant this," his hand roamed over Lexi's stomach and stopped to tug at her panties.

"What?" her outraged question was accompanied with a flying hand aimed at his cheek.

He caught her hand and pinned it down on other side of her head, as he climbed on top of her. "I know you want it," he murmured softly, bending his head down. He stopped just inches from her halfway opened lips. Lexi couldn't help it, she actually died for him to erase the small distance separating his hotness from her aching body. Still she didn't dare to make the first move, even as turned on the simple fact, that she could feel the heat of his body radiating off of him, had made her feel. There was no denying it, she wanted him. Lexi yearned for his lingering touch.

"But you shouldn't like this," his raspy voice announced.

"I know," she sighed, raising her read to softly capture his mouth. His response on the other hand was the opposite of soft. The way he kissed, was so deep and passionate, that it made her feel as if someone had lit her insides on fire. He pulled away for a second to look in her eyes, before starting to lick her lower lip while pulling at her panties so that they were lost between her wet folds, rubbing against the spot that made her whimper unwillingly. It wasn't enough, she wanted him closer.

"What's that noise?" she asked between moans of pleasure.

He acted as if he didn't hear anything. But the clinking was so loud, it hurt her head.

Lexi woke up covered in sweat, all alone in the dark room, one hand shackled to the bedpost. The clinking noise that had awoken her had obviously been the handcuffs clashing together. And thank god for that. She fell back on the bed eyes wide with horror. She had just had a sex dream – starring the guy she wasn't sure if she hated or feared more. Closing her eyes at the thought, the sight of him towering over her in the crazy dream came back to haunt. It turned out to be enough to force her to stay awake for the rest of the night.

…

Happy also woke up earlier than usual. After all he had a job to do and no way was he going to tell Clay and the others that in addition to her trying to escape twice already, he had gotten nothing useful out of her. He opened the door to find Lexi fully awake. Reaching out to free her hand, she jumped a little. Taking the cuffs with him, Hap left the door open and went back to the living room to wait for her to come out.

He was busy making coffee in the kitchen when she finally appeared.

"Others will be here soon, I need you to start talking," he shoved a cup of steaming hot coffee her way.

"How many times do I have to tell you, I have no fucking idea where my father is," she sat down behind the kitchen counter.

He eyed her suspiciously, "Until I believe you."

"We don't keep in touch, haven't seen him over a year," she sighed.

"And why is that?" he took a step closer. He couldn't help but notice how she tried to move further from him on the barstool she was occupying.

"More often than not, people whose parents have their boyfriend killed simply because they are representing some other color than white, don't exactly check up on each other afterwards," she said ironically.

He couldn't tell by her tone if she was telling the truth or not, but the look of disgust on her face said it all.

The sound of bikes lining up in front of the cabin caught his attention. "Go," he ordered motioning toward 'her room', not wanting others to find them casually chatting away, while lingering over coffee.

He heard her close the door just as others barged in.

"How's princess?" Tig yelled out, tugging at his chest.

Rolling his eyes he turned to Clay, "Find anything?"

"Dead ends," he sat down, obviously annoyed.

"Close the door and stay on watch," Clay told the prospect standing next to Chibs.

"So, what can you tell us?" he turned to Hap, as the prospect disappeared to the hallway.

"Says she knows shit about her old man. I think she's telling the truth," he said cautiously.

"You sure?" Clay asked walking to the window.

"Yeah," Happy confirmed.

"Well then, there's no use for her anymore. She's now just an unnecessary threat for the club. Take care of it," Clay said turning around to look at him.

"I thought we didn't kill women?" Juice protested.

"We can't just let her just walk out of here, every rule has an exception and this is it," Clay shrugged.

"Alright fine, let's put it on vote. Who's in favor of having Hap take care of the little problem behind the closed door? Yay," Clay looked at Jax.

"No, this is wrong," Jax shook his head.

"Yay," Tig nodded looking down.

"Backing my pres… yay," Kozik turned his head at Clay.

"No," Chibs got up, mumbling something in his thick Scottish accent.

"Nay," Juice said.

All eyes were turned to Hap. He had the deciding vote.

He nodded, "yay.". It was for the club. There was no other way. They couldn't just let her go, she knew too much about them. There was simply no other way of making sure that she wouldn't rat on them, or tip his father off.

"Have prospects bury her somewhere far away from the cabin, can't have her in our doorstep," Clay turned to Happy.

"Got it," Happy stood up to go after Lexi.

* * *

AN: Got the chapter up way sooner than planned, but I just got so carried away writing it. So, hope you enjoyed it and let me know what you think. :)


	5. Hell is leaving the light on

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

AN: So I think I should elaborate a bit on why I decided to write the kill-vote stuff in. As some of you might rightfully doubt if them deciding to kill an innocent women would be believable. I based it on the idea that when it is desperate times, they don't have time to really plan things to perfection, so when club's future is on the line, they are forced to do what is needed. Something like that has actually been on show- last season, where Jax had Juice kill the mother of the kid who shot those students and it was exactly because she was a threat to the club, unreliable and capable of bringing them all down. But still I see why this storyline could feel kind of wrong and I respect your opinion and try to make it up somehow. :D

Another reason was that I wanted to show you how Happy is struggling against the strange feelings inside him. Happy in my story is like the ultimate patriot for the club. The club comes first no matter what and the simple fact that he had to justify to himself that voting for the kill was in fact the right decision, has him on edge. He doesn't want those doubtful feelings, so he literally tries to kill them off.

* * *

Thinking about what he was going to have to do to that innocent girl on the other side of the door made him feel resentment, in a way he'd ever felt before. And not that he was a completely cold hearted killing machine all other times, he did feel bad on some occasions just that for his family any sacrifice was worth the little unease. And the club was his family. But still, even as it was for SAMCRO and he knew for a fact it had to be done, for some reason Hap found it physically difficult to bring himself to open the door keeping him from his totally defenseless and unknowing victim.

"Did she block the doorway?" the prospect asked making Happy turn his head toward the skinny dude looking at him with a raised eyebrow.

"Need help there?" he asked again.

"_You_ will need help picking up your teeth from the floor, if you don't shut up right now," Happy snapped averting his gaze back to the closed door.

Lucky for him, the little shithead knew better than to answer. Happy was already way too worked up to listen to some kid point out his obvious struggle. He had to practically force his hand on the doorknob, before finally succeeding at pushing it open.

Lexi was lying on the bed, those perfect tanned legs resting up against the wall. Happy couldn't keep himself from softly grinning at how fast she got up and how desperately nonchalantly she was trying to adjust her dress. Her Bambi eyes carefully directed at him.

Happy opened his mouth to order her to follow him outside, but nothing came out. He couldn't even hold his gaze on her. The way those soft curls fell on her shoulders, or how she also couldn't seem to be able look in his eyes for more than a second. It was right then and there, that he simply knew, the whole vote thing had been a bad call and he just couldn't go through with this. Someone else was going to have to do it.

But even then he was not sure if he would be okay with having someone else take her life. Well actually he was sure he wouldn't be. There was something about her, something rather strange, making the whole thing feel as terribly wrong as planning to burn down a whole classroom filled with kids.

To his surprise, she was the first one to get the words over her lips.

"I have a proposition for you," she said staring at her feet with a visible sense of defeat.

"What?" he blurted out.

"Not for you exactly, for your MC," she said slowly raising her glimmering eyes.

"I'm listening," he took a step forward crossing his arms.

"No, I want to speak with Clay," she refused shaking her head.

"You're not the one in position to make demands," Hap growled.

"Please," Lexi pleaded once again.

"Fine," he turned around, feeling somewhat relieved about getting away from her. Even if it only prolonged the inevitable.

He was back with Clay so quick that he could have sworn she hadn't taken a step from where she was standing by the bed.

"I hear you have something to say?" Clay moved in front of her in long and calculated steps.

"I don't know where my father is, but I'm willing to help you find him... but only if you promise to let me go afterwards," she said her gaze drifting back and forth between him and Clay.

"And how is that?" Clay smiled at her.

"Get the word of my imprisonment to the top of Mount Whitey and I'm more than sure he will reach out himself to offer you some kind of a deal," she said after clearing her throat.

"Well-well, does sound like a thought through plan, princess," Clay sneered at her, before leaving her without a clear answer.

Taking one last look at Lexi, Hap followed Clay back to their temporary chapel. Getting straight to the business, Clay started, "So our guest suggested she'd play along and help us get his daddy out from hiding, if we'll agree to let her free after all of it."

"Aye, sounds better than killing her off just to be sure!" Chibs nodded.

"Okay, even if she plays along and all, how can we still be sure that she won't rat on us when we decide to let her go," Tig looked at Clay doubtfully.

"We can't.. "Clay trailed off, turning around to look out the window.

"Unless we can somehow tie her to us, so she'd know that once we go down, she will too. Not a good plan, but beats the others we've had so far by a mile," Bobby who had just arrived shrugged after being brought up to date about the situation.

"Yeah, let's think about that idea. Do I need to put it on vote?" Clay turned back around to face them all. Everyone agreed.

Clay made his way to Happy, as they were heading outside. "You stay, keep an eye on her," he said squeezing his shoulder.

"Maybe the prospect.." Happy tried passing on the duty. He really didn't want to be here with just her. Her presence alone messed with his head, not to mention having to actually keep her close by.

"No, I need you here, just to be sure there's no chances of her getting a jump on us," Clay refused.

"Alright," Happy surrendered with a sigh.

After watching the roaring line of Harleys disappear behind the trees, Happy drudgingly dragged his feet back inside. There was only one thing to do to keep his mind from wondering what the hell was wrong with him, specifically about why he felt so reluctant dealing with her.

He reached for the bottle of scotch, just to ease the hurricane of thoughts overwhelming his brain, without even realizing that this time it was he who was being watched.


	6. So you can sharpen your knife

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

"So… do you always get to be the babysitter?" Lexi finally asked in a slighly less shaking voice than before, standing hands crossed in the hallway and eyeing Happy who was busy pouring out bourbon. Her question was answered with a simple glower, as he emptied the glass with one gulp and right away started filling it up again.

Lexi knew she was pushing it, but still couldn't keep herself from mumbling "Would be easier to drink straight from the bottle" just loud enough for him to hear.

"Watch it, princess," he growled, turning his head to glare at her once more, before landing on the couch with the golden liquor in his glass dangerously close to spilling everywhere around him.

"So the fact that they all left and I'm still here means that you took my offer?" Lexi spoke out. Well it was obvious that since they hadn't let her go nor kill her, she still must have had some use. But she wanted to hear it from him. Or maybe she simply wanted to talk to someone, even if it was the dangerous looking biker, who for some reason seemed to be more interested in staring at the ceiling, than talking to her.

"Okay then… "Lexi rolled her eyes at her silent companion. "Do I have to stay in there?" she pointed at her cellblock. As it turned out, being held against your will was just as much scary as it was… well in the absence of a better word- simply boring. Boring as hell.

After a long and quiet pause, he finally looked at her from where he was sitting, "No."

She regretted her question instantly. What the fuck was she thinking? She didn't want to stay in the same room with him, even more so after that stupid dream.

Inspite of that, she still found herself walking towards Happy, stopping to sit on the second couch across from him.

The silence was dreadful, but she was so not going to give in first. "Yes, I'd like a glass of whatever you're having, thanks," she said after a while, apparently unable to control her mouth.

Much to her surprise, he actually stood up to pour her one. Reaching out to take it, Lexi accidentally grazed his fingers, causing her to almost drop the glass, as she without thinking quickly pulled her hand away. Somehow though, he got a hold of the falling glass on the very last minute.

Raising it once again, he held it out to her, only this time not letting it go even when her fingers were gripping onto it as if her life depended on it. "Don't make me catch you from falling down," he finally let go of the glass and went back to the other side. There was actually more truth to his sentence than he himself knew. She had never been a party-girl, so when she did drink, not much was needed for her to be all over the place, not even remembering her own name. But she was not planning on letting him see any of that. Oh god, actully she didn't want anyone to ever stumble upon her in such a state.

However, one glass turned into three and soon the bottle was almost empty. Although it still did not add much to the conversation. Or rather the lack of one.

Though, that was actually especially surprising on her part, cause under the silent front there was a whole inner-debate going on inside of Lexi's head about the idea of trying to speak about random stuff. Just to erase the suffocating silence.

At some point Happy rose to put on some music. Apparently the silence was annoying him as well.

She had wanted to comment on the song choice, but decided against it. It was safe to say that there was a lot of toungue-biting involved with her sitting across from the tattooed statue of silence.

After an hour and one glass of fiery liquid too many, she felt unable to keep up with the game of silence they had so masterfully played until that very moment.

"What's with the name?" she wondered squinting her eyes at him.

"Nothing," he continued with his one-worded answers.

"Nickname?" she tried again.

"No."

"Why you?" Lexi had to hold on to the table, to keep the world from spinning.

"Me what?" Happy stared at her with a raised eyebrow.

"Why are you here, and not some trainee of yours or whatever you call those that want to become members of your wonderful law-abiding club?"

That question turned out to be two-steps back on the quest of getting him to talk with more than one word at a time. He got up without saying anything, and walked to the window.

"Did I hit a nerve? Is this guarding me some kind of a punishment to you?" Lexi chuckled at his turned back.

"Oh c'mon, I'm a good and willing listener," she said with a voice full of irony.

"Will you be quiet?" he snapped, still looking out the window. That's when she finally understood what had caught his attention. There was a sound of bikes closing up and considering by the way he was acting, and the fact that it was almost midnight, it was either a really well planned surprise party or someone without an invitation.

Happy was already on his phone talking to someone and walking back and forth so fast it was making her already buzzing head even dizzier.

"We have to go," he started dragging her toward the front door without an explanation.

"Geez, I can walk," Lexi muttered, as he continued jerking her forward.

They were just about to reach the front door, when the outside fire-show kicked off. It sounded like they, whoever they were, had come with an army. They were simply everywhere. The shots were coming from all sides and the loud noise was physically hurting her ears.

"Stay put," Hap yelled at her, as he pulled her down with him on top. Everything around them was shattering to pieces but the only thing her drunken mind could really grasp was the fact, that she could feel him against her. As Happy was loading his gun right next to her head, Lexi was busy trying to study his face. Those seemingly black eyes were actually not that dark, more like dark-brown. He smelled like leather and whiskey and something else she couldn't exactly point out. Suddenly his eyes met hers.

"You okay?" Happy asked in his gravelly voice, his lips moving just inches away from hers.

"Yeah," she nodded. Unable to stare into his eyes for more than a few seconds straight, she averted her gaze. The thing that caught her eye was blood, oozing through his white t-shirt and dripping down his muscular arm.

"Are you?"

* * *

THANK YOU for all the follows, faves and reviews! You are amazing! As always let me know what you think and sorry about the little cliffhanger. :)


	7. Get your motor running

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

"Ripped through," he stared back into Lexi's startled eyes, trying not to wince at the pain coming from his bleeding wound. He had felt the bullet go straight through the top of his left shoulder while he had been busy pushing her down on the floor. _At least it was me and not her_, he thought feeling a weird kind of relief.

Hap knew it was a matter of seconds, before strangers outside barged in. Although it was already a bit suspicious that they hadn't done it right away. Why bother shooting from the outside, when it was pretty obvious they had an upper-hand in the situation, considering the manpower and element of surprise. Something was off. He urged Lexi to crawl behind the cupboard in the middle of the hallway, following her with his gun aimed at the front door. They were still under attack, but the firing was slowly starting to calm down. Soon it was all over and he was ready for them to come inside, desperate to put a bullet in whoever was stupid enough to come at him guns blazing. Still nothing happened. Instead he could hear bikes riding in the opposite direction. Carefully Happy made his way to the now broken window, just in time to see the last one ride off. _Motherfucking Mayans, _he cursed at the taillight fading away behind the trees. He was dying to go after them, but silent steps coming up behind him were holding him back. He couldn't simply leave Lexi here, nor take her with him on a wild hunting trip.

"Who were they?" she couldn't help but ask.

Ignoring her question, Happy flipped out his phone and dialed Clay. "Mayans. Cabin's pretty messed up, we're okay, I guess it was them letting us know the truce is over."

"Yea, pres, I know I can't," he said after a long pause of listening to Clay's orders.

"Let's go," he showed at the door with his head.

"Go how? You're bleeding like crazy," she couldn't take her eyes off his blood soaked shirt. She was right, he had to stop the bleeding before getting on the bike. Carefully he took off his kutte to remove the bloody t-shirt underneath it, while at the same time bringing the first-aid kit from the bathroom. His head was clear as the day, she on the other hand was visibly stumbling over her own two feet.

Cleaning himself, standing in front of a mirror, his eyes drifted to her. Catching her blatant stare.

…

Lexi watched Happy throw bloody tissues into the dustbin. Actually she couldn't drag her eyes from his bare back. He was covered in muscles and tattoos, the combination was simply arousing. Her drunk mind was desperate to go and put her hands on him. Trace those lines with her fingers, while letting him do the same to her. Not that she had any tattoos. It didn't matter though, she just couldn't stop her mind from imagining his hands touching every inch of her body.

Moving her gaze from his back to the reflection of his front in the mirror, her eyes met his. As if being caught with her fingers in the cookie-jar, she quickly turned her head away.

"So where's the next castle tower I'm going to be locked into?" she asked trying to erase her dirty thoughts. Were they evident on her face? Could he tell?

"I need you to pull this tight," he, as always, ignored her question and barked out an order. At least he also seemed to be oblivious to her lust for him.

She took the opportunity to go closer and moved behind him. Wrapping the bandage around his arm, she pulled it as tight as she could. Letting go of the tied up ends, she mocked, "Can you even hold on to the bike?"

Happy turned them both around in a millisecond. Pinning her between his barely covered sizzling hot body and the cold as ice mirror.

His hands on both sides of her, he looked down at her, "You better behave once we're on the road, princess."

Confused at how to react, as her buzzing head was screaming at her to quietly back down, while her betrayer of a body was aching for her to get even closer to him, Lexi started laughing. "What exactly do you consider to be an act of misbehavior, Mr. Grumpy?"

He merely stared down at her for a second, before dropping his hands and straightening up.

…

After searching around for a clean shirt, they were all set to go. It was still so dark outside that he barely saw her doubtful expression when walking toward his bike. "Put it on," Happy held out a helmet.

He got on with a smooth movement and waited for her to follow his lead. "This dress is too tight for acrobatics needed to get on and well… stay on as a lady," she muttered.

"I don't care, not like I can see anything anyways," he was impatient. "Get on." Actually he could see pretty well from that distance, as she lifted her dress to get her leg over the bike. Now thinking about it, it had been a bad idea to look or even know about the fact that she sat there right behind him, almost nothing really separating her barely covered body from him.

Linking her hands around him, Lexi slid closer. Happy tried hard not to think about taking her right then and there. Even if he eventually managed to avert his attention to absolutely anything else, his dick was not following the same idea. It was hard as a rock from simply thinking about her for a second... or two seconds.

"Waiting for the lights to turn green or something?" Lexi mumbled under her breath behind his back.

Happy couldn't help but smirk at her drunken boldness. Nothing like the shaking wallflower from the previous day. Roaring up his bike, they left the sad swiss cheese looking cabin behind. Clay had told him not to bring her to the clubhouse, so instead he was forced to take her to his place, at least temporarily.

Soon enough they were in front of his tiny one bedroom house. He was reluctant on keeping her there, but understood the necessity. It was easier to hide her here, than right next to a place where people came to repair their cars.

Happy had more or less expected her to scream as soon as she got off from the moving bike, or cause some other kind of a scandal on the street, in order to get someone to come to her rescue, but instead she was quietly observing the house he was directing her into.

"Don't try running, screaming or anything else in that category. Cause even if you manage to get away somehow, don't think that we won't find you again, little girl," Happy threatened.

She nodded mildly, while looking around. "I know that the deal we hopefully still have on the plate is my best choice."

"It's your only choice," he corrected with a stone cold look on his face.

"Lighten up, dude, I'm behaving, aren't I?" Lexi turned her back to him. Giving Happy a perfect chance to covertly stare at her tight ass. She looked over her shoulder to add something, but catching the target of his gaze, quickly turned around without saying a thing.

"Eeh… can I take a shower?" she blurted out after collecting her thoughts for a second, still keeping her blushing face away from him.

With an agreeing grunt from Happy, Lexi disappeared in the direction he showed her. It was almost morning and he had yet to come up with a real plan here. Like where was she going to sleep, as he only had one bed and a tiny couch. Also should he still tie her up just in case, or could he trust her not to try something while he was dead to the world? Happy could practically feel his brain fuming, as Lexi finally appeared, wrapped in one of his towels.

"I know this is a long shot, but do you perhaps have something for me to wear? That dress was an awful miss on my part, when getting dressed to be kidnapped, you know," she stood next to the TV he had put on to kill the silence, and the sound of the water that made him super aware of the fact that she was naked and not that far away from him.

"Take one of my shirts, I'll get you some clothes tomorrow, "he said without directly looking at her. The peripheral vision alone turned out to be a dreadful temptation.

"Hm, okay ," she disappeared behind the closed doors.

She came out again, only this time he couldn't avoid looking her over from head to toe. The combo of damp hair and men's t-shirt turned out to be way sexier than the too tight dress she had been wearing before.

"What now?" Lexi asked keeping herself in a safe distance from him.

"Go sleep," he looked pointedly at his bedroom door.

"And where are you going to sleep?" she raised her eyebrows at him.


	8. Can't seem to see straight

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

"Not in there," he reassured, finding her astonished expression more than amusing. Mentally he had to add 'unfortunately' to his sentence, cause he would have loved to just lay next to her hot body, and why not under and above it as well… But sadly he had more pressing issues to deal with. Number one on the list- his bleeding/aching shoulder.

Whipping out his cell, he dialed Jax's number.

"Hap, you got out okay?" Jax asked, not bothering with greetings.

"Yeah, we're at my place. I got hit thou, doesn't feel like it's serious, but motherfucker is bleeding me dry," Happy grunted at the situation he was in. He probably would not have gotten that hole in his body, if he hadn't been forced to play a god damn babysitter.

"I'll be there with Tara in fifteen," Jax promised.

"Appreciate it, brother! One more thing, could Tara perhaps bring over some chicks clothing?" Happy suddenly remembered, eyeing Lexi who looked literally edible in his shirt.

"Taking that guard-duty seriously I see," Jax let out a small laugh before ending the call.

Happy hated being mocked. He had worked hard for the image on someone who was the opposite of caring and soft. But this Lexi-situation had turned him into a personal assistant, who when not taking bullets for her, dealt with supplementing her wardrobe apparently.

And all that without getting anything in return from her, sadly.

…

Lexi could still sense the drunkenness and that specific feeling in this situation was bound to be disastorous. The way his shirt smelled on her, so clean and yet manly at the same time made her head dizzy. Also the thought of sleeping in the same bed as him, had been more in the lines of arousing than frightening. All in all those intoxicated thoughts were definitely moving in the direction that was labelled under trouble and Lexi was trying hard to dispel those lustful ideas before his observing eyes could read them on her face.

"Can I ask something?" she took a step closer to where he was sitting.

"Shoot," he growled.

"What's the plan here, now that the cabin is in... how should we say it... in need of a renovation? Am I like going to stay here with just you?" she wondered, feeling torn about what kind of an answer she was hoping to hear.

He turned his attention back to the TV, "Will see."

They both turned their heads at the sound of a motorcycle slowing down in front of Happy's house. Afraid it might be the same guys shooting at them earlier, Lexi searched for Happy's eyes, her pulse quickening by the second.

As if reading her mind, he quietly shook his head and went to open the door, leaving Lexi all alone with the thought of how ridiculous it was that she was feeling safe with her capturer. His simple gesture had been enough to ease her worry. Happy was dangerous, but her intoxicated mind was all too willing to leave that notion to the side and treat him as the one person who'd save her from whatever was coming their way next.

It turned out to be the VP she had briefly seen at the cabin. Lexi was pretty sure his name was Jax. He was followed in by a brunette women and Happy. The woman gave her a small smile and turned to face Hap. "Let me see the wound," she said putting down her medical kit.

Happy, revealing his tattooed torso looked her way, motioning with his head at his bedroom door. Feeling that it was not the time to argue, she left the room.

What felt like half an hour later, she was lying in his bed, trying to listen to what they were talking in the other room. Unfortunately they had had the sense to crank up the volume of the TV, so she was pretty clueless on what was going on behind the closed door.

She jumped to her feet, hearing the door slowly open. It was the woman who had patched Happy up, holding on to a small bag.

"I brought you something to wear, I hope they fit. I'll try getting you something else as well, as I now have an idea of what you look like," she walked inside with a wary smile on her face.

"Thanks," Lexi took the bag she was holding out.

With a nod the women turned to leave. "It's a messed up world, what do you get from it?" Lex's voice sounded sharp, "I mean you're a doctor or something, why do you associate with criminals? Help me understand."

"I'm sorry you're in this situation," she turned around, "I really am, and this is probably hard for you to believe, but they're not bad people."

"So you're okay with what they're doing?" Lexi was staring at her incredulously.

She opened her mouth to answer, but was distracted by Jax appearing on the doorway, "Tara, everything good here?"

"Yeah," Tara nodded, throwing one last glance at the obviously irritated Lexi before following Jax outside.

The conversation with Tara had brought Lexi back from the drunken cloud of oblivion. The women knew what they did, and simply stood by telling her that they were actually not that bad. The way she had blindly justified their actions had struck Lexi like lighting, kicking her rage and sanity back in. What was she thinking, feeling safe with Happy. Or even worse, feeling attracted to him. He was a criminal holding her in captivity. Her sobering mind was screaming at her to make one last attempt of running away. This was her real chance, they were inside a town and not between outgrown forest with miles of nothing and no-one surrounding it. She simply had to be smarter this time. Smart enough to keep him from instantly following her. She looked at the window, it only opened up a little, making it impossible for her to sneak out from there. "Guess it has to be the hard way again," she mumbled, thinking about a way to get Happy in the bedroom, while she was outside of it, free to walk out the door, without his watchful eye.

…

Happy thought about going to check on her, but guessed that as it had been quiet since Jax and Tara left, she had probably turned in for the night.

However he was wrong.

"Can't sleep." Happy couldn't tell whether it was a question or a statement. He watched her make her way to the other end of the tiny couch he was sitting on. She stood there waiting for him to say something before sitting down. He merely nodded once, jaw tight. Allowing her to join him.

"Maybe a drink would help?" she suggested, pouting her lips to him.

"Go ahead," he looked toward the bottle of whiskey standing in the cupboard under the TV. She moved to it eagerly and he couldn't look away as she bent down, almost revealing her ass to him. Staying with her was a constant temptation and he was in a serious need of a good fuck. One way or another he was determined to bang some crow eater tomorrow.

"Want one?" she looked at him a bit nervously.

"Yeah," he watched her fill up the glasses.

She sat down next to him a little closer than she had before, her body turned toward him. She gulped the drink down in one sip, trying to hide the face that was caused by the way whiskey burned her throat. He did the same and placed the glass on the table, next to hers.

Happy felt her eyes study his bare chest and with an unexpected move, her hand was on the bandage that Tara had used to cover the stiches. "Does it hurt," she asked biting her lip.

"No," he groaned, feeling his dick react to her touch. She was seriously an expert on giving him blue balls.

Her hand moved down on his body and he caught it right before it reached his pants. "What're ya doin?" he demanded, although at the same time he couldn't really believe he had just stopped her.

She took a deep breath and attacked his lips. Happy pushed her away, but didn't let her out of his grasp.

"I'm sorry," she stammered, eyes wide. Happy, unable to hide his smirk, slowly moved his head in front of her, wrapping his lips carefully around her trembling lower lip. Touching it with his tongue made her gasp. He pulled away again to see the look in her eyes, but they were closed. "Look at me," Happy commanded. She raised her eyelids and he couldn't hold on any longer. He captured Lexi's mouth, his tongue demanding access. Letting go of her shoulders, his hands found their way to her perfect ass, squeezing it and pulling her on his lap. She was grinding against him and he was already hard.

"To the bedroom," she murmured between kisses.

He didn't need her to tell that twice. Lexi scooped up in his hands, Happy moved toward his room.

He placed her on the bed, hands roaming underneath her shirt, cupping her boobs over her bra. He was dying to be inside her, but wanted to make sure that this was something she really wanted as well.

"I wanna taste you," he breathed against her, moving down on her body to pull down her underwear. Running his finger over her wet entrance, he was almost ready to explode. Pushing her legs wider apart and running his tongue over her clit, she let out a moan filled with lust. She was so ready that it didn't take long, until she was quivering underneath him, screaming out in pleasure.

…

He was so good with his mouth that she was on the verge of forgetting all about her plan to escape. It had already gone way further, than she had initially planned, but being all honest, there was not a voice in her head that regretted those last minutes of heaven on earth.

Still she needed to do it now or never. It was her chance, he was so off-guard.

"My turn," she kissed his neck, tugging at him to let her on top. As he was underneath her, his dark eyes fixated on hers, she was actually finding it hard to physically move. The way he looked at her, it was simply put orgasmic.

"But first, let me bring us something to drink," she bent down to whispered in his ear, afraid he'd see through her lie, if she'd look him in the eyes.

"Don't move," she dragged her hand down his torso, her voice hoarse.

She was out the door and it didn't look like he suspected a thing. Lexi couldn't really believe that she had gone that far, as to let him go down on her, but it had been too hard to stop, and all in all it had worked out just the way she had planned. She got to the door and opened it, without making a sound. She was outside. In a man's t-shirt and no underwear, but at least, she got out.

* * *

Can she get away this time? Let me know what you think.

As always, thank you for all the feedback, you're the best! :)


	9. You're my kryptonite

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

Something was holding her back. As if taking another step forward was somehow a mistake. Like unconsciously she wanted to go back inside and stay with him… Which was crazy and stupid and frankly made her worry about her mental health, cause how could a sane person ever feel that way about some guy who has been holding a gun to her head, figuratively as well as literally.

It was still dark outside and there was not a single person in sight. Lexi had no phone, no money, nothing really. Thankfully she did recognize her surroundings enough to at least know which way to walk. Charming was a small town after all.

Lexi's gut was telling her to start running instead of simply strolling, she'd already wasted too much time wavering on his front steps, trying to figure out what the hell was wrong with her brain. All she knew, Happy could have already been on to her plan, about to bust out of his house, his loaded gun aimed at her back.

That thought managed to push Lexi forward. She was quickly on the street, moving hurriedly towards her apartment building. She had decided against going to the police or asking some bystanders help, at least for now. SAMCRO probably had the whole police department on their payroll anyways. And how could some neighbor of Hap's really help her in the long term. Her only real option was to run and hide, to get the hell away from Charming, SAMCRO and Happy, and never to come back. She was more than sure that if she'd rat on them, she'd be held in Charming for the investigation and however that turned out, she would be definitely on their hit-list.

But if she'd simply hide from them and not talk about the things that had happened to anyone, there was at least a chance they would leave her be. But first she needed some money and clothes to get on the first bus out of the hell that had occupyed this little town.

Lexi moved like a shadow, hiding in the bushes when hearing a sound of a vehicle closing up. She felt chills simply thinking about how furious Happy must have been when he finally realized she was gone. Hell hath no fury like a biker fooled. "Good dammit," she muttered, scraping herself with another sharp branch while trying to get out of the bush she had crawled into hearing something with a motor coming up behind the corner. She was barefoot, in a man's t-shirt and probably had a leaf or two stuck in her messed up hair. So in addition to trying to hide from a certain biker, she was also attempting not to catch any unnecessary attention to herself from other people. Even though she had not seen herself in a mirror, Lexi was more than sure that she looked like someone who had jumped over a nuthouse's wall.

Her apartment building was finally in sight. As it turned out, she was practically living in the same neighborhood as Hap. At least had been living. She had no intention on staying there more than a few minutes. Just enough time to get her things and bolt.

It was a two-story building, with her apartment on the second floor. She made her way upstairs to the securely locked door that was not making her life any easier. She didn't believe in keeping a spare key under her door mat or something. Lexi had always figured that when in need of it, she could simply call her best friend, who was keeping it safe in her place, and she'd gladly help her out. Only this time it was the middle of the night, and she had no time, nor a phone. Looking at the flowerpot outside her door, Lexi picked it up without a doubt and threw the heavy brown pot through the window. The glass shattered and she reached through the hole to open the window up properly.

"What's going on there, I'm calling the police," a shaky female voice yelled at her from the doorway of her neighbor's apartment.

"Hey, miss Jude, it's me, Lexi," she smiled at the old women holding what looked like a vase in her raised hand. "I couldn't sleep, came out to get some fresh air and the stupid door locked behind me, sorry if I woke you."

"Oh, sweetie, it's okay, I was up anyways. Want to come over? I can make you some herbal tea. Works like magic when I can't sleep," she waved her over.

"Another time, thanks for the offer, though," she forced on a smile.

It had been one thing to break a glass. Getting in through its shattered pieces, having nothing covering your feet, turned out to be a whole other dimension. She groaned, feeling a small piece of glass get stuck under her toe as she finally got in. She pulled it out trying not to whimper and turned around.

The place looked just like she had left it. No-one had been here. Walking around she noticed her answering machine's light blink. She pressed play and moved to her dresser to get rid of Happy's shirt. Most of the voicemails were from her boss, wondering about why she hadn't turned in for her shift. She was busy throwing clothes in her bag, when the last one started playing. She recognized the voice instantly. It was her dad.

_Lexi, I need you to contact me. It's urgent. Call your grandma Bella-Rose, she'll give you my number. _

"Oh wow, you do give a damn, though still not enough to come here personally and see for yourself whether I'm okay or not," Lexi mumbled, closing the zipper of her bag.

_Call grandma Bella-Rose_. Well that was bound to be difficult, as she didn't have a living grandmother or a one named Bella-Rose in general. Her dad had managed to pass the information as a code she cracked immediately though, she had to give him that. Bella-Rose was a bed and breakfast he had taken her and her mother more than once when they were still pretending to be a functional family. Until she finally understood, who her father actually was, Lexi had always thought about those times they'd spent there with warmth in her heart. How foolish of her. Those 'family moments' had actually been all about his father's mission to clear the earth from color and the place was his league's regular meeting spot. It was only when Lexi got older, that she started understanding the connection between those visits and the movings from one small town to another.

She opened her laptop to scribble down Bella-Rose's number, as well as to look for the first bus that could take her away from Charming. She was in luck, there was a bus heading out in half an hour. Lexi wrote down its information as well as the next ones, just in case she somehow managed to miss the first.

She was just about to get up to gather her things, when she heard the all too fucking familiar sound of a Harley coming to a halt in front of her building. Running to the broken window, she saw a man coming off of it. Lexi turned on her heals, heart beating like a drum-solo and grabbed her bag. She was not going to wait idly for Happy to get to her. This time she was going to fight. Or at least run really fast.

Lexi was on the fire escape on the other side of the apartment in a second and was trying hard to climb down without drawing attention.

…

Happy was lying on the bed, taste of her sweetness still on his lips. The night had turned out way better than expected. He grabbed a cigarette from the bedside table, lit it and closed his eyes for a second. The only thing he could see was her face when he was working his magic between her legs. The thought of being inside her made his dick throb.

"What's taking so long," he yelled out getting suspicious. But there was no answer. He put out his cigarette and climbed out of the bed.

"You sneaky little bitch," he muttered, rage building up inside him, as he noticed that she was nowhere to be seen. Grabbing a shirt, his kutte and keys, Hap was out the door.

_FUCK,FUCK,FUCK, _he wasn't sure if he was more furious at her or himself for letting her play him so easily. He had obviously been thinking with his manhood, rather than with his brain. Happy got on his bike and headed out searching for her, while at the same time mentally beating himself up for letting something like that even happen. He knew he should have told Clay, but just couldn't make the call. Shit was too embarrassing to even say it out loud to himself. He needed to find her, before the whole thing unraveled.

The streets were empty, not a single sign of her. And she could not have been that hard to miss, as she did leave with practically no clothes on. He chose the route that lead from his place to the police station. But she was not on it.

He stopped next to a police car and whipped out his cell. Happy had no other choice, he needed help.

"Hey man," a sleepy or drunk voice greeted from the other side.

"Juice, I need a favor," Happy started, "can you get me Lexi's address, I need to get something from there."

"What, now? You know what time it is?" Juice argued.

"Yeah now," Happy insisted, his voice calm and serious.

"Alright man, I'll text it to you," Juice agreed.

"Thanks."

Where else could she have been. He needed to try everything before acknowledging his defeat. Juice was quick, he got the address in seconds, and it was quite close to where he lived. Thinking about the small distance, it seemed reasonable that she at least went there to get a change of clothes.

He slowed down in front of her apartment building, next to an already parked Harley. Lexi lived on the second floor and Happy saw that she had obviously been there, or she had been mugged. One way or another, someone had mercilessly destroyed her window. He squeezed himself in through it, as the door was locked up.

…

Lexi got down from the fire escape and peaked around the corner. The guy who had arrived on a Harley was taking his time smoking next to his bike. It didn't look like he was hunting someone, which made her courageous enough to get a bit nearer. On a closer inspection the guy was definitely not Happy. Lexi sighed with relief, feeling her pulse start to slow down. She still had a change.

She hailed a cab and was soon waiting for her ride to safety. "Only ten more minutes," she paced back and forth, waiting for the bus to come.

…

Happy was inside her apartment, but besides him it was painfully empty. She had been here though, her closet was practically turned upside down. He noticed a piece of paper with a number and what looked like a bus schedule written on it on the small glass table. He grabbed it with him. The first one on the list was just about to leave to Oregon.

He ran down to his bike and headed for the bus stop. He could already see her standing there, blonde hair waving in the wind. She turned her head and seeing him come her way started running. He ditched his bike and started chasing after her on foot.

"Time has run out, baby," he grabbed her hand from behind, "this night could have ended way better for you, believe me."

* * *

I'm frankly a bit lost on how he should punish her, without letting others know about this little fiasco.. Ideas?

But as always THANK YOU THANK YOU for reading! :)


	10. She's a little runaway

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

"Let go off me, I will scream," she threatened, trying to get her hand back from the big caveman in biker gear, acting like she was a sparkle of fire he had just discover and decided to never let go.

"I dare you," he smirked, looking as if he had already won this tiny battle they were having.

Lexi opened her mouth to scream at the top of her lungs. Her plea for help was immediately hushed by his free hand forcefully pressing down on her mouth. The look on his face was pure gloat. It angered her like nothing else, so she instinctively jabbed her teeth into the calloused hand covering up half of her face.

"You little gash," he sputtered, pulling his hand away from her mouth. She couldn't see that clearly, as it was still dark outside, especially under the trees they were standing, but by the way he inspected his palm for a second, she felt like she had managed to pull some blood. _Good, _it was her time to gloat. She used the sudden opening to surprise him with another painful gift, by aiming her right fist straight to his face.

As it turned out, even his head was rock hard, cause by the looks of it, her clever idea had hurt her hand more than his cheek. Or maybe he was simply that much better with his stone cold poker face.

He didn't even waver, instead he yanked her closer, "You wanna play it rough, huh? Fine by me, someone obviously needs to teach you some manners." He started dragging her further into the park that she had ran to.

"No please," she begged, afraid of what was coming next. No matter how much she tried blocking his movement, he strode on like a force of nature. It was like trying to tackle an endlessly rolling stone.

"Put your hands on the tree," he commanded finally stopping behind her, shoving her toward a tree trunk . She looked over her shoulder to see what he was up to. The devilish smirk was back on, causing shivers to run down her spine. "Do it," he repeated, watching her reluctantly place her shaking palms against the rugged surface.

"Please don't hurt me," she pleaded, hearing him walk around behind her.

"And why the hell not? You clearly like smacking-games, and up to now you have done everything to deserve a little punishment, Princess Runaway." Lexi could hear the grin in his voice.

"I think a little spanking session could possibly cure you from that disease of always trying to sneak away, or what do you think, "Happy growled into her ear as he had come to stand right behind her. His hands moved from her waist to her jeans zipper, opening it up with a fast movement and pulling her pants together with her knickers down around her ankles. Leaving her standing there, cool breeze caressing her bare bottom. Although she wasn't exactly sure whether it was the wind or just the feel of his piercing stare, that made her shiver unwillingly.

Happy's raised hand landed on her buttock without warning. It didn't hurt as much as it left a fiery sensation. He was obviously not trying to simply cause her pain, he was using just enough force to leave the spot his palm touched sore and burning.

"You feel like wanting to run away again?" Happy asked, his gravelly voice echoing around her.

"Mmmno ," she moaned as another slap landed on her bare ass.

"What was that?" he turned his attention to her other cheek.

"No," she spat out angrily, looking over her shoulder as she did.

"Good," he gently patted her burning buttcheek with his hand.

Stepping up to her from behind, broken branches underneath his feet crackling, Hap bent down and whispered in her ear, "And did I hear you moan?" His hand slowly moved down on her buttocks and straight between her legs making her arch her back in surprise. Feeling his finger softy trace a line through her wet folds, she let out a gasp. Even though she hated him with a true passion, she still wanted him with that same powerful passion as well.

With a grunt he pulled away, "Let's go."

…

He watched her silently pull up her pants. She was visibly shaking. Again there was that annoying feeling of doubt when it came to her. Had he gone too far? No. She deserved it, they had a deal and she broke it and on top of it left him on his bed waiting and wanting. Although he might have gone too far in the end by touching her, but he just had to know, if spanking had any effect on her as well. Oh and it did, her pussy was so deliciously wet and ready. He simply needed to get her pants back up again quick, before he would have thrust himself in her without asking.

The tightness of his pants and another set of blue balls in sight were getting him angry all over again. Reminding him of how he had gotten into this situation in the first place, almost letting her leave town. He would have never lived it down. 'Killer got played by a Barbie doll', he could hear Tig's laughter accompanying that never ending mockery. Thankfully he had managed to save the situation on the very last minute.

"Next time, I won't be able to control myself to stop it so quick, in case you think of trying something like that again. Don't," he stared her down, as they got to his bike.

She remained quiet and he hated that look of embarrassment on her face. He reached for a pack of smokes in his kutte's pocket, instead his fingers caught that piece of paper he had taken with him when leaving Lexi's apartment. He pulled it out and waved it at her. "Whose number is it?"

This was the first time since the incident in the park that she looked at him. Her eyes were wide and deciding.

"Spit it out and beware, I will find out if you choose to lie," he held his dark eyes at hers.

She clearly debated with herself before finally sighing, "It's a way to my dad."

He had his cell out in an instant.

"I have a number," he announced, while shoving his helmet at Lexi.

"Chapel first thing in the morning, tell others," Clay's voice was calm and collected, although Hap could still tell he was pleased with the news.

"Alright," Happy put his phone away.

"Hold your horses. It's not his number. It is simply a way for ME to contact him. You on the other hand have no use of it," Lexi snorted, pulling her hair to one side.

"Well then I guess we now have a real use of you," he signaled at her to climb behind him.

* * *

As suggested, a little spanking-themed punishment. Hope no-one got offended by it. :D

Thank you for reading and I'm always glad to read your thoughts and suggestions.


	11. No time to say good-bye

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

The sun was already rising when they finally got to TM. Happy had figured it was better to keep her close at all times, unless he wanted another reason to punish her. Not that he would have minded getting his hands on her ass again, but explaining her success at getting away more than once would have been excruciating.

"Morning sunshines," Tig greeted Happy and Lexi as they were climbing down from his bike. "You good, bro?" he referred to his gunshot wound.

"Yeah, I'm good. Can you keep an eye on her? Need to have a word with Clay," Happy reached out, pushing Lexi toward him.

"Sure thing," Tig's grin was frightening. "Come to me, baby."

Happy got inside, the familiar scent of cigarettes and sex was filling the air. It suddenly struck to him, he hadn't really been there for a while. He had been too busy playing baby-sitting with Lexi for the last few days.

"What is she doing here?" Clay demanded catching a glimpse of her through the window.

"We need her to make the call, it's not Weston's number directly, so there's no reason for tracking it or something, it's a god damn bed and breakfast," Happy slumped down on the coach.

"You think we can trust her to do as we say?" Clay seemed to deliberate for a moment.

"Maybe," Happy watched Clay make his way to the chapel.

"Get her in here," was all he said before disappearing behind the chapel's doors.

…

"Did you have fun with Killah?" Tig murmured in her ear, as he flew is arm over her shoulder, dragging her forward.

"No," she gulped, wanting to duck and run. The guy was seriously giving her the creeps.

"Too bad, babe, too bad. Maybe you two should have banged, that always cheers me up, you know" he laughed and began to hum some weird melody.

She flushed, it hadn't been that far from it.

"Come here," Happy stood at the doorway, his eyes going from Tig's hand on her shoulder to her blushing cheeks.

"Miss Weston, so good to see you again," Clay gestured at her to take a seat. "I hear you managed to get us a number," he sat down at the head of the table, "though I'm not sure how exactly?"

Lexi peaked at Hap who was standing by her side. She did not want to elaborate on her failed runaways and by logic neither did Happy. "I suddenly remembered," she spoke out in a weak voice.

"That's fortunate," the smile on Clay's face was ominous.

"So we need you to reach out to him, tell him you managed to run away and need his protection. And as I'm betting he is a careful son of a bitch, he will give you a place to meet, too precautious to come and get you himself," he said in a casual voice, "and of course as promised, we'll let you go once all this is over.

"So?" he asked, like she had a choice. In reality disagreeing was obviously not an option. One look at his stone cold stare made that sure.

"Let's get this over with," she sighed. She felt the wrongness of her cooperation, but not enough to sacrifice herself for that bastard. Even as much as it hurt her deep inside, she knew her father really did deserve everything that was coming to him. At least that was what she repeated to herself over and over again while dialing the number a few hours later.

A friendly female voice answered on a second ring.

"Hi, I was told to call this number in order to contact AJ Weston. I'm Alexandra," she said, feeling the weight of threatening gazes coming from the bikers surrounding her.

"Miss, I'm sorry, but I have no information about this AJ Weston," she answered in a calm and collected voice. Lexi's eyes wandered around the room, before she tried again, "I see, how about Joan West?" It was a code name her father had taught her when she was a little girl learning the alphabet. It had been his way of teaching her that ordering matters, in every aspect of life. Just in a way that mixing letter up in his name would turn it into something clearly wrong, so did mixing different racial groups.

"Can you write down the number?" the girl on the other end said after a moment of silence.

"Yes," Lexi's eyes rested on Happy's, who was sitting right across from her. Something in his dark eyes calmed her, instead of agitating her, like they generally did.

They waited for another hour to map down the exact ways in which Lexi's conversation with her dad could possibly go. It was like rehearsing for a play and she was starting to freak out. Not only hadn't see talked to her father in a very long time, she was now forced to lie to him, practically on a gunpoint.

"Lexi?" a familiar voice answered.

"How did you know it was me?" she couldn't help but ask.

"Only you had the means to get that specific number. You okay?" he almost sounded concerned.

"Not really," she burst into tears, the realness of the situation finally getting to her. Although crying was not planned, she knew it actually helped making the whole thing even more believable.

"I can't go home, I don't know what to do," she sniffled.

"Where are you?" he asked.

"In some cheap motel," Lexi said, staring at the reaper engraved into the big wooden table in front of her.

"Do you think you can get to Morada Christian Center by tonight?" her father's voice was sharp.

"I think so," she nodded, although he couldn't see that.

"Good, make sure you're not followed," was all he said before ending the call.

Lexi looked up at the men before her. "Can I go now?" she wiped her cheek with the back of her hand.

"Not yet, honey," Clay smiled at her, "can't have you out there spoiling our surprise party, but after that you're free as a bird."

"Hap, you're staying with Lexi. Make sure there's no way for her to reach out," he turned to Happy.

Happy followed her outside. She turned around to ask him whether they were going back to his house, but not considering how close behind her he actually was, she literally bumped into him.  
"Sorry," Lexi cringed, realizing her hands were resting on his abdomen. The feel of his abs underneath her palms made her want tear that shirt off of him.

Quickly she stepped back, trying to play it off nonchalantly. "Are we going back to your place?" she looked at his face.

"Why? Wanna finish what we started?" Happy smirked.

"Honestly I just want to lay down and wait for this awful day to be over," she said hastily.

"We're staying here," he half-smiled. "You can go sleep in one of the dorm-rooms."

"Oh how very generous," she couldn't suppress a yawn. The sleep deprivation was definitely playing a role in her lack of control over her inappropriate thoughts.

…

Happy made sure there was no way for her to get out or get a word out. He left her sleeping and rejoined the club area. He didn't like being left behind on the whole thing, but also didn't protest, as he understood, it was his last day with Lexi. Even as he didn't want to admit this, he knew she had at some point managed to crawl under his skin a bit.

"Plan is all set," Clay pulled him aside. "Once Weston is dead, we'll get back, get her fingerprints on the murder weapon and let her go," Clay started, "there's no way she'll go to the cops, as aside from the fingerprints, she also had a motive, fucker killed her boyfriend, and the call record proves she talked to him, possibly to get his whereabouts."

"There's no way she'll talk. But if she does, well, too bad for all of us," Clay patted him on the shoulder. "We'll clear the clubhouse out by the evening, only you and Lexi will stay here, so that when we come back there will be no unnecessary set of eye seeing the grand finale of our little deal."

"Got it," Happy nodded, pressing his lips together. What they were doing, it felt wrong, but it was better than the alternative. At least he was not forced to eliminate her as a threat to the club.

…

By the evening the club house was so quiet, everyone was gone except for her and Happy, who was sitting by the pool table, observing her like a hawk.

"You know it would be more fun for both of us if you'd join me," she turned to him. Trying to play against herself was pretty boring.

He got up and took the cue she was holding in her right hand. "Hey!" she protested, as he threw it across the floor. He was towering in front of her with an unreadable expression. Taking a step closer, he pressed his hands on her hips and propped her up on the pool table.

Yet again his simple touch had managed to wake up that little devil inside of her, who only cared about getting what she wanted. Which was him.

His hands traveled further south until they stopped on her knees. Just to push her legs apart, enough to make room for him between them.

"It's time to say good-bye," he whispered against her ear, before starting to slowly kiss his way across her cheek. He stopped at the corner of her mouth.

She opened her eyes to take in the look in his. He wanted her, she wanted him. There was no point in denying it. And just like he said, it was their good-bye. "It is."

With a smile crossing her lips, she raised her hands to his neck and pulled his head closer. Capturing his lips in a way that left no time for breathing.

However, the sound of a door creaking open made them pull away from each other, before they even got to the really fun parts. The way Happy instantly tensed and grabbed for his gun, she knew, it was not someone they were expecting.

"Hide," he whispered, looking around in the dimly lit room.

The painful silence was cut in half by a gunshot and the sound of a falling body that followed it. Horror made Lexi clasp a hand over her mouth to keep herself from screaming. Someone was coming her way, as she could hear the sound of boots coming closer by the second. But before she could even see who it was, a familiar gravelly voice saying, "Lexi?" had her sigh with relief.

"Happy?" she searched around for where his voice had come from.

"I'm here," Happy was in front of her, pulling her out from underneath the pool table.

"Who was that?" she looked for answers in Hap's face.

"Your personal search-party," a man's voice announced from the darkness.

"Drop it, push it away and get on your knees" he commanded Happy, who had spun around at the speed of light. "Do it, shithead," the stranger walked closer, pointing a gun at Happy's head.

Reluctantly Happy lowered his gun and with a grunt knelt down. "Now you there, come here," the guy gestured at Lexi.

"This is a gift from your father. You get to end that bastard's life," he held out his gun to Lexi.

"What?" she took the gun he was shoving at her.

"Do it," the guy, who Lexi just now started to recognize as one of his father's followers, yelled at her.

"Oh no, no, no," she shook her head. She didn't even need to think. There was no fucking way she could shoot Happy.

"Don't," she fought the guy's hand trying to take his gun back from her. "If you don't do it, I will," he pushed Lexi with a force that sent her falling down, bashing her head against the pool table's corner on the way. Ignoring the sharp pain and the feel of something warm run down her forehead, she looked up.

"You idiots are messing with the wrong people," the guy said aiming his gun at Happy.

* * *

**Thank you so much for reading! **

**Hope you enjoyed it. **


	12. Leaves turn blue and the sky green

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

There was no time to waver, no time to scribble down pros and cons. It was just a matter of seconds before it all went to hell either way. Before she even registered what just happened, there was a sound of a gunshot piercing her ears and a wave of horror following it.

Lexi looked at her shaking hands as if they belonged to someone else. With a muffled shriek she dropped down Happy's heavy black gun, which she had landed right next to when she had fallen not more than a minute ago. By the look of it she had managed to hit the intruder somewhere around his neck, as he was on the floor twitching and trying to cover up the wound that was bleeding like crazy with both of his hands.

There was not enough air to breathe and she felt her sight go fuzzy before it all went black.

…

Happy caught a hold of her before her head could touch floor. He scooped her up and gently carried her limp body to the couch. Sitting next to her for a second, he looked around. He had an unconscious girl, two dead bodies and a gun that had killed both of them with her fingerprints on it. Whether she would ever see it the way he did or not, Happy knew it was Lexi's only way out. No-one here was going to pin those murders on her, unless she took the first step in that direction. Having something to hold over her head was the only way Clay was ever going to let her live. So whatever had gone wrong in the Morada Christian Center, cause something was obviously off, otherwise those two guys would not have come here, she was still going to be free from all of this.

Happy carefully bagged the murder weapon and hid it away before taking out his phone and calling Clay. Only that he did not pick up, nor did Jax or Juice or anyone else. _Shit,_ he tried to call Ope, just as he barged in.

"What the fuck?" Opie stepped over the pool of blood that surrounded the guy Hap had killed first.

"What happened?" Happy demanded ignoring the questioning look on Opie's face.

"It was a god damn trap, they're all in jail. I tried to go after those bastards and when I came back they were all being cuffed and …" Opie's eyes travelled to Lexi's still body. "Is she?"

"No, she passed out after shooting one of them," Happy looked over his shoulder. _To save my life_, he added mentally. There was no need to point that out to Opie. Happy was thankful to her, but he hadn't asked her to do anything. That had been her choice.

"What? She did? I thought those were Westons's guys, here to get her," Opie looked confused.

"They were. It got out of hand. I don't know.. She just," Happy couldn't find the words to admit it out loud. He wouldn't stand here without her.

Not wanting to stay in debt, he knew well what he had to do to pay her back. She needed a way out and he needed to help her out, before the situation turned even worse.

"Will you deal with all this? I'll go contact lawyers and Gemma," Opie let it slide. Lexi's questionable decisions were not exactly the most pressing issues on hand.

"Yeah, I'll call in prospects to help clean it up," he nodded, "call me when you know something."

Just as Opie was out of sight, Happy heard Lexi move. Casting a glance over his shoulder to face her, Hap saw that she was sitting on the couch, gripping onto it so strong her knuckles were turning white. Her eyes were hovering over the dead body. _Fuck_. He had meant to cover that up before she came to consciousness.

As he took a step closer, her hand rose to her chest. She looked up and he could see her eyes watering up. The mere sight of her was awful and he had no idea of what to do or say. He could see her coming apart at the seams and there was nothing he could do about it.

"You have to go," he said in a low, intense voice.

"Is he dead?" she glanced up at him, her body still hyperventilating.

"Yeah and I'll take care of it. You need to get out of here, out of Charming," he stared right back to her glimmering eyes.

"I killed him," her tear-filled eyes went back to the dead guy as she covered her mouth with a hand to muffle her cries.

"It's over, you have to go. NOW!" Happy raised his voice, managing to draw back her attention.

"How could I do that to someone, what have I turned into?" her voice was full of regret as she looked at him.

"JUST FUCKING GO, you won't get another chance," he yelled at her, unable to keep his own emotions under control.

Lexi staggered up and with one last look at the guy lying dead on the floor, headed for the door. He grabbed her hand as she was about to pass him, causing her to flinch at his touch.

"This will never come up, that gun will stay well hidden, I promise you, but only if you will stay quiet about everything that has been happening in those last few days as well. If not, well, we all go down together," he let go of her hand, trying not to look at the hurt in her eyes.

Without saying anything, she nodded and disappeared behind the wall to grab her bag. She was out before he had the chance to mentally say good-bye.

…

Lexi felt dirty and she felt sick. Most of all she felt like wanting cry herself into the next decade, maybe even century. There was no redemption to her actions. Cause whatever happened next, there simply was no do-over. She was going to have to live with herself and her past. There was no bright future for her anymore and yet under all that realization, somewhere deep inside she still knew, that being put back into that situation, she would make the same choice. And that idea only made her hate herself that much more.

Sitting on the bus and passing the 'Come Again' sign that demarcated the line between Charming and her dark future, she said good-bye to the person she had been up until this day.

* * *

**But their journey is not over yet ;) **

**Thank you for reading! **


	13. I've got the anger of a burning sun

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

What's the word that describes the state of mind where all you can concentrate on is just_ that_ one thing? Obsession? But when it's like some really-really bad shit, shit that you know you have no control over? When it owns you, has swallowed you whole. Has possession over your mind like some kind of a relentless demon.

Well it felt like something of that kind, when the only thing Lexi could concentrate on was trying to keep her mind of off all that had gone down in Charming. With whatever means available- booze, sex, even a wee bit of drugs here and there. All in all, if there was a downward spiral, then that was it. And it had led her straight to the epicenter of lives where future had no meaning and past was something you ran from.

…

"Where's everyone" Clay stood in the chapel's doorway looking at the nearly empty room in front of him.

"Ope and Jax are on their way I think, Chibs is still up north and Hap's getting his dick sucked," Tig counted the names on his fingers.

"Get them here," Clay ordered before going back in.

"Time to pull out, bro, we have church," Happy could hear Tig yelling through the closed door.

"Get out," Happy jerked his head toward the door. She knew the deal. Once he was done, it was time to leave anyways. The blonde croweater, he did not know the name of, quietly gathered her clothes, and with a moment of doubt, for deciding whether or not she had the courage to waver a second longer to get her clothes on, she rightfully chose against it. He could hear the whistle and a 'hot damn, baby' that came from the other side of the door, as the practically naked girl disappeared behind it. A smirk formed on his lips thinking about how he still had it- the ability to make them fear and want him at the same time. For a moment a face he had tried hard to forget flashed before his eyes. It had exactly all the signs of fear and desire crossed in it. It had been more than a year since the last time he saw Lexi.

Pushing that last thought out of his head, he took a quick shower and joined others in chapel.

"As you all know, there's a new shipment coming in next week and after that Mayan blast last Thursday we're a bit short of storage space," Clay took a long drag from his cigarette.

"I doubt we can put up a new warehouse that quick," Bobby shook his head.

"No, even without the time issue Blue-Bird's money is still all tied up, with Rosen creating a dummy corporation and everything. Basically no re-building in the near future," after a moment of silence Clay added, "and exactly because of that I was thinking about reaching out over the border."

"Another charter?" Jax looked at Clay.

"Not exactly," Clay rested his elbows on the table, "with those damn Mayans also pressing on Jury's crew, I see a mutual benefit in Sons permanent presence in Indian Hills."

"A patch-over?" Jax raised his eyebrow, "Devil's Tribe isn't exactly outlaws these days, more like book-keepers and bouncers."

"Doesn't matter. They need our protection and we need their space, it's the best solution for both clubs," Clay wasn't backing down.

"So we're riding to Nevada? Fuck, Jury has all that sweet young pussy, gonna be a hell of a patch-over party," Tig nodded approvingly.

"Yeah, but too bad you and Juice are driving the precious cargo" Clay smirked at the pout on Tig's face.

"Oh c'mon, let the prospect go with Juice," Tig seemed to be close to begging.

"Neh, you're going. And nothing can go wrong, I'm serious," Clay added as the smile on his face began to fade.

"I don't feel right pressing this on Jury without warning," Jax looked doubtful.

"Yea, but we need this," Clay slammed down the gavel. "Heading out first thing in the morning."

"Wanna switch? I'll owe you man," Tig followed Happy out of the clubhouse.

"Nope," he couldn't help but grin at the desperation on Tig's face.

"Oh fine, awesome. I'll just pick up hitchhikers so hot you'll be sorry you didn't take my offer."

…

"I just got a call from Jury, he needs us to work at the clubhouse tonight, someone's coming to visit or something," Cherry barged into Lexi's room without knocking.

They had been sharing a small apartment for months now and she had yet to conquer the manual on how to respect other people's privacy when living together. But other than that she was quite okay. Not that Lexi was in a position to judge. Cherry after all had taken her in, right when she had nowhere else to go. She even got her a job that helped to keep her head afloat and at the same time didn't require that much thinking, which was perfect in the sense that Lexi had more or less given up on that brain function in general. There was no point in trying to strive forward, she was damaged and worthless, and simply didn't deserve better.

"Both of us?" Lexi kicked her legs out from under her blanket.

"Yep, should be there around eight."

"Did he say who exactly we're going to entertain?" Lexi asked, rubbing her sleepy eyes.

"Didn't really get into that much detail, but I hope it's some other MC," Cherry truly even looked hopeful. She was forever on a hunt for a man to make her his old lady.

Lexi on the other hand shook with fear every time someone mentioned a club that wasn't Devil's Tribe. She had been wary working for them in the beginning, as the mere sight of a clubhouse had brought on a handful of awful memories she was trying to run away from. But in the end she didn't really have a choice and Cherry had done a good job reassuring her that Devil's Tribe was as small club that simply owned the Maid of Night strip club she was now dancing five nights a week. She was able to work around her schedule enough to avoid also dancing at the clubhouse like other girls, unless Jury specifically asked them all to be there.

Although by now it actually didn't matter that much anymore, for who or where she was dancing. At one point she had simply gotten used to men ogling at her body. Might have also been the result of being forced into taking on some really late shifts- which was the code for private shows with complete nudity. Although money had no real meaning to her, as she was not looking for a way out of that life, basic expenses still turned out to be too much of a burden to simply get by on doing a few rounds around the pole in a bra and panties.

Also after a few nights in the clubhouse she had finally eased up on that as well, as there were no mentions of SOA or the League. It really looked like it indeed was a small club that was doing a good job staying away from the main battlefield.

"Will you ever tell me why you're so afraid of other MCs?" Cherry sat down on the edge of her bed.

"What? I'm not afraid."

"Yeah right. I know that look on your face that appears only when someone mentions the big bad biker-world."

"There's really nothing to tell, I just don't feel that well," Lexi lit the joint laying on her bedside table.

"I doubt_ that_ will make a difference, better take a shower and I'll go make you some coffee."

"Yes, mom," Lexi forced on a smile. If only Cherry knew her story, she'd understand why it was better for her to be a bit out of this world at all times. But that was not something she was planning on sharing. Even after a year, the feel of killing a man was still weighing on her conscious, making her hate herself just as much as everyone else related to her past.

* * *

As always thank you so much for reading! I'm guessing you now have a sense of what's around the corner for Hap and Lexi.. I'll try to get the next chapter up sooner than usual, but until then you can also check out my other stories. :)


	14. Don't hunt me, don't haunt me

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

"Really? This is what you're wearing?" Cherry made a face at her saggy red and white soccer t-shirt.

"What does it matter? Gonna be wearing a god damn lingerie in a matter of hours anyway," Lexi couldn't see the problem in her choice of clothing. She was simply going there to work, which meant stripping down to her bra and knickers to work out some moves, and whenever that part was over getting back home as usual. So there really was no difference in what she chose to wear on the way to the clubhouse and back, as she for sure didn't plan on staying there any longer than workwise necessary. Unlike for example Cherry, who had her sights set on being there as much as possible, swirling around the pole or not.

"Well suit yourself.. Just that you'll stick out like a mariachi player in a rock concert," Cherry shrugged.

"Ain't planning on staying there overtime, you know."

"Oh c'mon, why not, you always duck out as soon as possible. Have some fun for a change, why don't you.."

"I guess I'm just not looking for fun tonight," Lexi gave Cherry a crooked smile through the mirror she was sitting in front of while trying to straighten her flaming red hair. It had taken her some time to get used to not having blonde curls, but it was a necessary sacrifice, just in case she'd run into someone from her past.

Then again, she didn't exactly hide her identity, as she hadn't even bothered with changing her name. In her mind it was simple, if someone was after her, they'd get her eventually anyways, so why prolong the inevitable. But lucky for her, so far no-one had tried anything.

Yet it was still better to alter her appearances just enough to not be so obviously familiar if she'd ever be so unlucky to cross paths with people she hoped on never seeing again.

"Sometimes I just don't get you. You are okay with partying at the Maid, even elsewhere, but never in Devil's clubhouse."

"Let it go, the whole MC thing just isn't my style, okay?" Lexi looked at Cherry over her shoulder. She, unlike her, was wearing a tight pink dress that seemed to be painted on her.

"Alright-alright," Cherry shook her dark hair out of a ponytail, "but we should be heading out soon."

"I'm almost ready."

Just like any other time, as soon as the clubhouse was in eyesight, Lexi let out a breath of relief. Nothing looked out of place. No unfamiliar bikes, no unfamiliar bikers.

"Ladies," Needles greeted, as they got out of Cherry's worn out sedan. His eyes rested on Lexi's shirt for a moment too long, making her doubt the decision to wear it. It looked like Cherry had actually been right. It really did draw attention to her. But still she didn't intend on staying in it, or in the clubhouse for that matter, long enough for those weird looks to start annoying her... at least not more than they already did.

"Others are already here, go change your clothes and they'll fill you in," he gave them both a small smile.

"Sure thing," Cherry returned him a smile as bright as the coulndn't help but roll her eyes, Cherry really was trying too hard.

As it later turned out, they were going to entertain some brother club. A notion that still made Lexi tremble a bit, even as she tried her hardest to remain calm.

"Going to be a great night, I can feel it. Fresh meat and everything," Cherry dabbed on what looked like a tenth coat of lip gloss.

"Yeah, good luck fishing," Lexi felt herself ease a bit as the tequila shots started to work their magic. There was no way she could do that night sober. Well the stripping part of the night wasn't exactly the thing she feared, more like the part of not knowing the name of the MC they were going to flaunt their bodies to. And as there was really no way out of that specific gig, it was better to help her mind adjust to the possible horror.

"You hear that?" Cherry got up, looking like she was about to squeal.

"I hear this bottle calling my name, yeah."

"C'mon, let's go out there and put on that smile I know you have," Cherry started pulling her up by the wrist.

"You go ahead, grab the best ones, I'll be right behind you," she gave her a small wink.

There simply was no easy way to explain to Cherry why she couldn't go out there like her, skipping from anticipation and all. Even with all the help that tequila was offering, fear as big as a mountain had nailed her down to the chair and it felt like her heart was trying to crawl its way out of her throat. "It will be okay," she took another shot before finally pushing herself up to follow Cherry.

But it wasn't okay.

It took her only one glance from the hallway to notice a patch all too fucking familiar and she felt physically sick.

"Sons of Anarchy, I've heard of them," Cherry said, looking at the aforementioned motorcycle club with sparkle in her eyes.

"I..mm, forgot something," Lexi backed into the dorm room they had been getting ready in.

"What?" she could hear Cherry call out behind her as the door swung shut.

There was no simple way out of it, not unless she wanted to specifically draw attention to herself. She also needed the job. Starting her life over once had been hard, starting it over the second time seemed all together impossible. And after all there was this little chance they wouldn't even recognize her, most of them only saw her once and she did look different back then. If she'd simply do her show, avoiding eye contact, maybe they wouldn't even know it's her.

And what if they did?

She hadn't gone to the police. She hadn't ratted on them. Would they even care it's her?

And did _she _even care? A voice somewhere deep inside of her whispered 'Not _that_ much...'. Perhaps she was just afraid of the confrontation, not for her life.

Life... what life? Her whole existence was no more than a downgrading joke, so... if they did choose to end it, it might even be fine by her. Let's be honest, it wasn't like it was ever going to go back to normal anyways..

Yet, even with all that going through her head, she still couldn't bring herself to open that door protecting her from the people who had played a central part in ruining her life. It was way easier to sit down, take another shot, and pray for no-one to notice her absence.

"Here you are? I thought you were giving a private show or something," Cherry startled her. Lexi had been there, trying to drown her sorrows, for over an hour already. Basing on the sounds, the party had kicked off pretty fast and not one girl had yet had the chance to come back to their small dressing room- a fact Lexi was really grateful for.

"I'm not feeling well."

"Maybe it's the tequila that's not making you feel well… You know you should come out before they start asking about you."

"Why would they ask about me?" Lexi's eyes met Cherry's almost too quickly.

"Cause they pay you?" Cherry raised an eyebrow. "Oh and by the way I just heard it's a patch-over."

"What does that mean?"

"It means things are about to change," Cherry ran her fingers through her hair. "Anyways you better get your skinny ass out there," she said before going back out.

…

Happy's eyes drifted over the spread-eagled blond girl in front of him. Flashing Happy a dirty smile, she turned around to face Jax sitting across from him. After giving the girl's behind a good once-over, he let his gaze roam the room. He was going to stay there for a while, helping Devil's Tribe adjust with the changes, so he had enough time to sample and choose from the line-up of girls working for them. He looked up just as a redhead passed him by. Her eyes met his for a second and he had to do a double take. She was a dead ringer for Lexi. But before he could get a better look, she had reached the exit. A soft breeze hit his cheek as the door slowly closed behind her.

He knew the error in wanting to follow the face so familiar to that of which he wanted to forget. Still he couldn't tame his curiosity. Was it possible she had a twin? Or was it simply a coincidence? Maybe he had just been imagining it all? One way or another, he needed to be sure.

As he got out, there was not a single person in near sight. He stepped forward, only the sound of his shoes hitting the gravel filling his ears. Still there was no-one there, other than a couple getting it on on a bench.

Just as he was about to go back in, a small figure appeared from the dark. Lifting, what looked like a branch, it moved to a black sedan and smashed through its back window.

Carefully Happy moved closer, watching the person reach in from the back, to open up driver's side door. Even though it was dark, Happy was quite sure that was not a car you'd want to steal, it was a piece of shit, making the whole thing that much more suspicious.

"Shitty choice," he noted, looking down at the redhead trying to work on the wires.

She looked up and it was his turn to be caught off-guard.

* * *

As promised- a quick update. As you could see, she was about to face her demons, but seeing Hap, her old habit- running away from him- kicked in. :D


	15. Stuck in a puddle full of fear and tears

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

With a heavy sigh, Lexi dropped the pulled out wires she had been holding in her hands. Now that was something she had to explain to Cherry later, if there even was such a thing as 'later'.

It was one of those few times, when she could really read Happy's expression as clear as the day- he was shocked and speechless, leaving it all up to her to start that inevitable and downright dreadful conversation.

"Please, just pretend you didn't see me, okay?" Lexi staggered out of the car. It was actually a good thing she couldn't get the car started, as those shots of tequila had definitely hindered her ability to coordinate her sight and movements.

His hands grabbed a hold of her, as he pushed her behind the car. Making sure no-one could possibly see them from the clubhouse and backing her against the trunk, he finally let her go.

"Why the fuck are you here? What were you thinking? I told you to get away," somehow he was able to yell and whisper at the same time.

"I work here, not that it's any of your business. And I did get away, it's not my fucking fault you managed to stumble upon me. It's not like I knew you were coming here, so get off that high horse of yours and leave me the hell alone."

"After everything that happened in Charming, you came here to be a croweater? Are you stupid? I gave you a way out, to go and start your life over, to leave all the MC hell behind you, and you just ended up here, huh?" he glared at her. If she hadn't been so full of drunken boldness, she might have actually been on the verge of crying simply because of the anger waving off of him.

"Oh sorry, daddy, for not succeeding at those high goals you had set for me. I wonder what went wrong?" she looked up, pretending to think about that. "Oh, I know, I think it might have been something about you guys ruining my life, I don't know, does it ring any bells to you?

"And hey, not that it really matters, I'm not a croweater, I'm just here for the night to put on a show for you. Ain't that just great?" she added sarcastically, giving him a smile that never reached her eyes.

"So you're a god damn dancer now?" he spat out.

"I think the term 'stripper-whore' also covers it very well."

Lexi smirked at his gaze travelling over her trench coat. "What? You want a sneak peak?"

"You need to get out of here, before someone else sees you," his voice was somehow softer now.

"That's what I was trying to do, but now, after having this sweet little eye-opening talk with you, I realize that I really don't care about who recognizes me. I kind of also need this job… so if you'd be so nice and get the fuck out of my way, there's a pole calling for me."

"Why are you doing this?" he slammed a hand in front of her, blocking her way.

"Why? Cause you won. Isn't this what you all wanted? To hurt him? I bet he's turning in his grave, knowing what I'm up to," she snorted. "Oh yeah congrats by the way, I heard you actually did finally get him, in some tattoo parlor apparently… So now that your job is done, mind telling me what he did to deserve all that?"

"Gang-raped Clay's wife."

Her eyes went wide as this new information sank in. He really was a monster. "I guess he got what was coming for him. I have to get back in."

"Hate us, all right I get that, why live that hate out on yourself?" Happy squinted his eyes at her.

"Really?" the fake smile, she had so far managed keep up, faded away. "Maybe because when you kill a man and get away with it you simply don't deserve a better life, at least in my book you don't."

"I'm sorry that happened to you," he actually looked sincere.

"Well it was my choice and those are the consequences I have to deal with, so just stop whatever this 'apologizing' thing is, I want nothing to do with any of you," she was finally able to get past him.

Getting a few steps toward the house without hearing him follow her, she had to peak over her shoulder. It wasn't like him to let her have the last word. Against all her expectations, he didn't try to stop her this time, he simply stood there, one hand resting on Cherry's now really messed up car.

"Where have you been?" Needles was smoking on the porch.

"Sorry, I needed some fresh air," Lexi smiled at him apologetically.

"Well go get in," he motioned at the door.

She nodded silently, pulling the door open. The party was as wild as ever.

"Get up there, Gina has been swinging there so long I'm afraid she might even be too tired to keep her duck-face on," Cherry hurried past her.

Cautiously Lexi moved closer to the small stage with a pole positioned between two lines of couches. Smiling at the relief on Gina's face, she let her take a final bow and gather her clothes as well as the bills thrown at her.

"Here we go," she mumbled quietly, quickly scanning the room. No-one was paying specific attention to her. At least no-one looked like they had had a revelation while seeing her face. Which was a good sign. Maybe Happy really was the only one with enough of a good eye to place her face.

…

Happy felt sick. It was not like him to feel sorry for something he or the club did. With a job like his, there simply was no room or reason for feeling bad. Yet here he was, trying to keep himself from punching the car from sheer frustration. They had really fucked her life up beyond belief and he felt genuinely shitty about all of it.

He got back in just in time to see Lexi get up on the stage. Thankfully no-one else really did seem to pay that close attention to her, she was just some chick about to take off her clothes in front of them. As much as he didn't want to go in there, making her feel even more awful than she probably already did, he also couldn't stay away. He just had to keep an eye on her, in case someone started something.

Happy took a seat, while she was faced to the other side. Instantly he saw her smile falter as she finally turned around and noticed him watching her. He almost waited for her to storm off, or something like that, but instead she stepped forward, while at the same time slowly losing her coat and leaving herself to stand there in a sparkling black and red underwear.

The prospect sitting across from him let out a long approving whistle. Hearing that, Happy's blood went into a serious boiling mode. He had to clench his fists in order to keep himself from physically dragging her off of that pole she was now sliding down from.

The anger was even forceful enough to keep him from getting all turned on by seeing her bend down in almost nothing. Never ever had a striptease been as painful to watch as this.

With a look directed at him, saying 'fuck you', she reached behind her back to unclasp her bra. He gulped, seeing those two perfect tits bounce up and down as she moved around on the stage. At this point even his rage wasn't enough to keep his blood from moving south.

"Take it off, baby," someone shouted a little while later. Searching around for the source, Happy abruptly stood up. Those hungry looks on the other men's faces pushed him into a full-blown murder-mode. A round of cheers forced his stare back on the stage, just in time to see those black and red panties fly over his head. It took him a moment to gather the fact, that she was now standing there, butt naked, with a room full of horny man ogling at her, practically eating her with their eyes. All while he, unlike everyone else, couldn't even enjoy the sight, as his eyes were now only seeing red.

Fortunately her full-on naked show didn't last that long. If it had, he would probably have had to join her on the stage, just to end that nightmare himself.

"Just wow, like oh wow," that stupid prospect appeared next to him.

Happy just glared past him, while listening to Jury declare that his girls were also glad to offer private shows.

"Did you hear that? I think I'll try to get a room with this redheaded beauty," the prospect said.

That got his full attention. He couldn't even help but direct his murder-glare on the poor fellow. There simply was no way to fake indifference at that point.

"She's mine."


	16. When it's not war nor love

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

"Come with me," Happy commanded, pulling Lexi's hand as she got down from the stage.

She knew well enough, that now, after the private shows thing had been officially called out, there was no way she could simply go home after her stage gig. She had to do at least one private dance before it was okay for her to duck out... And Happy was definitely not the one she wanted to give that timeslot to, if she had any say in the matter.

"No," she muttered, trying to get her hand back from his grasp, hoping no-one from the Devils or Sons saw that.

"Don't make a scene," he said in a hushed voice as if reading her mind.

"Ahh. Where do you think you're even dragging me?" she let him lead her out to the hallway, hoping for there to be a bit smaller amount of wondering eyes on them.

"You're going home," he glared at the small redhead stumbling behind him in a black silky robe. There was no way anyone was going to see her private show. They had already seen more than enough and the thought made him angrier than he wanted to admit.

"No way," she forced him to stop by grabbing a hold of the doorway with her free hand, "I'm here to work, you asshole, and if you don't like it, then by all means you go home, but leave me the hell alone."

"Everything alright? I can't tell whether those are fuck-faces or angry-faces?" Needles had silently appeared next to them.

"We're good," Happy gave him a short look.

"She gives one hell of a show, you chose well," he patted Happy's shoulder before moving along.

He could feel a muscle in his jaw twitch thinking of what he had just implied on.

"How long have you been here?" he cast a look at her.

"Long enough for him to know what he's talking about," Lexi smirked, as if reading his mind. "And long enough for roots to start growing underneath my feet if I have to continue standing in this hallway. I'm not going anywhere until my official workday here is over, so either get in that room with me or I'll go find someone else who will."

He didn't respond. Neither did he move. As it was pointless standing there, arguing and drawing attention, Lexi simply turned around and started walking back in. She didn't have to look over her shoulder to know that he was right behind her. _Fuck_, she thought, hoping that something, absolutely anything, would happen before they got to one of those free rooms with the intention of being all up close and personal.

Passing Jury on her way, she gave him a weak smile. Noticing who exactly was following her, he responded with an approving nod. Guess at least she was doing her job right, just like Cherry and other girls, as they were all busy entertaining guys from Charming in one way or another. Truth be told, now she was actually even a bit glad that it had been Hap, who had apparently kind of staked his claim for the evening, cause it would have been the definition of bad luck, if she'd been forced to dance to Clay or someone else capable of recognizing her. But then again the fact that it actually was Happy, didn't make it really a good luck either.

"Any special requests?" Lexi peered at him as they entered the free room, trying to act like being alone with him wasn't freaking her out.

"You don't have to do anything, we'll just stay here for some time. Then I'll take you home," he sat down on the bed, letting his hand slide over his tattooed head, making him look like the weird mixture of frustration and calmness.

"And yet you're still a bit delusional, so listen close- I'm not going anywhere with you. Stop pretending you're some chivalrous prince, here to save me."

"I ain't no prince, but I do owe you," his dark and deep eyes found hers.

She snorted and turned her back to him while walking to the music player in the corner of the room. She didn't want him to see the fear that was so obviously written on her face. It was clear as the day to her that simply staying inside that room, doing nothing with him, wouldn't actually be any better than giving him a lap dance.

Truly she just couldn't handle being in such a small space with him. What would they do? Chat about weather or how the gas prices had been going up lately?

Besides absolutely everything he did or say was so god damn confusing and made her want to scream and rage. Why couldn't he have just ignored her? Why did he have to be such an aching reminder of everything that had happened between them? Not that her mind hadn't already been replaying her past on repeat, but him being here made her remember the almost good parts as well, and those were the memories that perhaps scared her even more than anything else.

She couldn't help but think about the last time he had his hands on her. Or that night in the park. Or the time in the cabin right before she got away.. _Stop, _she yelled at herself mentally. Those thoughts, his presence and all those shots of tequila she had devoured earlier were kind of turning her on. This was basically the worst thing to happen while she was standing in front of that certain smoking hot biker, who would probably be all too willing to let her have her way with him. It was an internal battle she couldn't afford to lose. But she was also not going to throw in the towel and simply run away this time.

Turning around to face him, she glared at him one last time before letting her robe slide down her body, "this is who I am now, so enjoy the show and drop that savior mission, don't need anything from you."

She half hoped for him to protest, to grab the fallen robe from the floor and toss it back to her, saying he was serious about her not having to do this. But at the same time she couldn't also help but enjoy the way his eyes scanned her from head to toe, stopping to hover over her sparkling bra. She tried hard to block all lustful thoughts out from her head and to fill it with music instead.

Lexi's one hand moved to her hair and the other down her body as she slowly made her way in front of him with Marvin Gaye's "Let's get it on" echoing through the room.

Laying her hands on his strong shoulders, Lexi pulled herself up on the bed to straddle him. For some reason his stare was just as angry and serious as hers. She arched her back while sensually swaying her hips.

Reaching behind her back, she released the clasp of her bra, letting it loosely cover up her breasts.

As he had been quiet for so long, it actually quite startled her, when his gruff voice pulled her attention. "You're playing with fire."

"Been burned too much to care," she stared back at him, before letting her bra drop onto his lap.

He turned his head to the side to avoid looking right at her exposed nipples.

"Oh, don't waste it, it's the last close up of me you'll ever see," she smirked, her voice full of sarcasm.

"I warned you," his raspy voice announced as he took in the sight of her exposed chest, while his hands found her back to pull her even closer.

"Tell me to stop," he said while leaning in and running his tongue over her instantly hardening nipple, sending a jolt of fire down south.

"Aah," she gasped at his touch. It seemed to have encouraged him as he took it as an invitation to continue and close his mouth over the top of her right boob while raising his left hand to roughly cup the other one.

This was nothing like the private shows she had given before. Yes, they were allowed to touch her, but she didn't have to have sex with them, neither did she ever really want to. But Happy's touch made her lose her mind with a second and there was no way she was going to be able to stop him, if he'd take it any further.

While working on her breasts, his free hand traveled along her bottom, pulling her crotch against his obvious hard-on. His calloused hand worked its way under her underwear, stroking and squeezing her right butt cheek.

He was in so many places all at once, that she didn't even realize the exact moment that he had managed to tear her lacy panties into shreds. After quickly getting rid of them, his hand found its way back to her behind and started moving inwards. She let out a moan as his fingers touched her clit and without a warning it moved along and was up her entrance.

"Stand up and turn around," he commanded.

Doing as she'd been told, Lexi could hear him unbuckle his belt and push down his pants over her own hard breathing. Looking over her shoulder, she took in the sight of him rolling a condom on his impressive length. The internal battle was long lost, she needed to get him out of her system just as much as she needed him to leave her alone.

Happy reached out and with his palms on either side of her hips, he pulled Lexi back to him, with her front still not facing him. He slid his hands between her legs to push them wider apart, making room for his palm to effortlessly cup her crotch. "You're so wet," he murmured, while applying special pressure on her clit.

Her only response was a whimper.

Lexi could hear him swallow hard and with a grunt he pulled her to sit on his lap, helping her slide right onto his rock hard cock.

He filled her so tight it was almost too much. It was almost too good.

As she had been rocking up and down on him for a while, feeling like she was about to explode, he placed his fingers over her clit, rubbing it with speed that made it impossible for her to hold out any longer. She came with a shriek so loud she was afraid someone would barge in thinking one of them had died. Her throbbing around his member must have had an effect on him as well, as he came almost right after her with a grunt that was buried into her shoulder.

As she was trying to get off of him, he latched a hand over her middle to hold her in place, him still inside of her, as he continued to quietly nibble on her neck.

With those soft kisses that landed on her shoulder, it doomed on her. They hadn't even shared a single kiss. It had just been a crazy, hot, animalistic sex... which was good, cause after all it never was about them making love.

Yet now he was ruining it all.

Fighting her way to stand up, she looked around for something to cover her naked body. Her underwear was now unusable and her bra seemed to be missing. She almost skipped to her robe lying on the floor.

"It doesn't change anything, I still want nothing to do with you," she wrapped it tight around her, yet still feeling naked under his gloating gaze.

"You sure?"

There was something weird in the look that accompanied that loaded question.

* * *

**Thank you for reading. Hope you liked it. ;)**


	17. That's when the real darkness arrives

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

**AN: Warning! If you're easily offended, then you might want to skip the ending of this chapter. **

"Oh yeah, I'm sure," Lexi glanced down at Happy before turning around to leave. "Wasn't really that impressive," she added without looking back at him, as her fist closed around the doorknob.

Not giving Hap the pleasure to respond, she skipped out, quickly shutting the door behind her, while at the same time silently gloating over her success at having the last word. Which of course was a total bullshit, but still, his ego needed to be pulled down a notch. He was nothing if not impressive and even with all the resentment she had towards him, she couldn't deny- he had driven her to the highest of highs. Yet it still felt all too bittersweet to really enjoy, as she thought about it while making her way to the dressing room, where she was instantly face to face with Cherry, whose car she had oh so not-gently messed up just a few hours ago. Her list of regretful decisions was forever growing apparently.

"Eeh, Cher, please don't kill me," Lexi said, carefully stepping behind the chair the dark haired girl was sitting on while re-applying her make-up.

Looking at Lexi through the mirror in front of her, Cherry eyed her questioningly, "What're you talking about?"

"I.. well.. khm. How to put it? I threw a rock through your car window and then tried to start it up from the wires… unsuccessfully," Lexi bit her lip while saying that, really hoping for Cherry to be a bit too drunk to care at the moment.

"You did what? Why in the right mind?" Cherry spun around in her chair, confusion flaring in her big eyes.

"I'll explain later, I promise. Long story short, I just needed to get away fast and I didn't have the time to come back in to search for your keys."

"Are you shittin' me?"

"No, but I'll pay for the repair and everything. Can we just deal with it later, please? I'm sorry," Lexi apologized, unable to read Cherry's expression.

"I really don't get you sometimes," Cherry got up, "this is just bat shit crazy, there better be a real explanation there tomorrow, not some shit about you feeling sick or any other of those go-to excuses you always whip out."

Lexi nodded, watching Cherry head for the door. She stopped in front of it and turned on her heels. "Where were you anyways? I scanned the room for you before, don't say you had a private party," Cherry gazed at her curiously.

"Yeah, I was with someone," Lexi said in an instant. "I mean I gave a private dance," she corrected herself immediately.

"Hmm," Cherry eyed her with a dirty grin, "who?"

"I.. I don't know his name, one of the Sons," Lexi lied, trying to avoid looking straight in her inspecting eyes.

"Mmm, delicious, better tell me about that one later as well," Cherry gave Lexi a wink before she disappeared behind the black door.

Hoping for tomorrow to come with ideas like no other, she slumped down on the red sofa and closed her eyes. She needed one hell of a story to cover up all that had gone down. There was no way she was going to tell Cherry everything about Sons, Hap and her. Rubbing her eyes, she looked around for her bag. It was time to go home.

Calling herself a cab, she picked up her belongings and stuffed them inside her duffel bag, deciding to go out with her robe and not with that soccer t-shirt she had come in with. Telling herself it was just because it would have probably brought more attention than she wanted and not simply because she didn't want him to see her in such a hideous thing, she closed the door of the dressing room behind her and hurried out.

From the corner of her eye she instantly noticed Happy sitting on one of the couches, talking to his VP. He definitely saw her leave too, but lucky for her didn't decide to following. At least so it seemed during the time Lexi was still inside the building.

When she got up the next morning, or rather the next afternoon, Cherry had yet to arrive back home. Guessing she had really scored with one of the Sons, Lexi flipped open their work schedule. Comparing the timetable on her laptop with the clock, she let out a heavy sigh. She was supposed to head in soon, Cherry on the other hand had a day off. That lucky bitch. Although them not having to work together in the evening was also a blessing, as the night had not brought Lexi any ideas on what to tell Cherry about the car incident.

Hoping Cherry didn't drop in any minute, Lexi started getting ready by taking a quick shower. Running a soap bar over her shoulder, she couldn't help but think about Happy's lips on her skin, or his hands running all over her body. With every single thought that crossed her mind, she felt as if she was actually getting dirtier… and hornier, instead of getting clean.

As she got to the strip bar a few hours later, she was not mentally ready to see Needles talking to two reaper-covered backs. And of course one of them just had to be Happy. A jolt sped through her lower abdomen at his mere sight. The other one was the crazy-eyed one she'd had the displeasure to meet in Charming. Tig was it?

As she was putting on her lacy and not that much coverage-giving costume, the door burst open just as a sound of thunder filled the room. The weather had been getting worse by the second. Feeling simply put startled, Lexi glanced at the entrance. It was Lacey, who at the moment looked like she'd been taking a bath, while fully clothed.

"You look fresh," Lexi couldn't help but comment.

"It's unbelievable, I almost couldn't see the road with all that rain making the asphalt reflect every single streetlight straight to my eyes," she sighed, trying to comb through her soaking wet hair.

"It wasn't so bad when I got here," Lexi dashed on a coat of mascara. "Not that I would know, I had to take the cab, Cherry didn't find her way back home." Both girls let out a short laugh, it was no secret that Cherry was always on a hunt for an Old Man.

"Oh, before I forget, I spoke to Needles. He wants us to go on stage together in the last round," Lacey yelled over the roar that her hairdryer was making.

"Okay, but who's going on first? I can go if you want some time to get used to roof and not heavy rain over your head," Lexi offered, looking at Lacey who was lost underneath a bush of black hair.

"What?" she turned her head.

"I said I can go on first so you can dry off," she repeated.

"Oh good, thanks hon!"

Lexi was all too eager to get the night over with. How long where those SAMCRO guys going to stay here anyways? A nerve died with every second she spent on thinking about them, two when she actually saw them.

The room was quite packed, even with the weather that would have suggested otherwise. Guess they were giving shows so good that even a real storm wasn't capable of keeping their loyal customers away. One of them being her least favorite- Larry. He was always too hands on, even as he had been thrown out because of that on multiple occasions. Last time he had tried to put his dollar-bills along with his fingers right underneath her panties. The horrible situation still haunting her, she was determined to not go near him tonight, even if he held a million dollar bill, a house and a fucking airplane between his nasty fingers.

Letting her eyes travel over others sitting around the stage, she didn't even have to search in order to find the one she'd been looking for. Happy was sitting right at the end of the stage, his ominous dark eyes glued on her. He looked pissed, unlike Tig next to him, who was already eating her alive with his observing eyes.

The thunder outside must have kicked in another gear, as it was now literally making the lights inside twinkle. She hadn't even gotten to the part where her bra usually decided to call it a night, when everything went pitch black. She couldn't even see her own hands.

"Your hotness left no room for the electricity, doll face," someone from the crowd she no longer could see called out.

As it was pointless to simply stand there, holding on to the pole in a blacked out room that was giving her a bit of a claustrophobic feel, Lexi decided to go out through the back exit and wait for a some kind of a solution on the porch. She got out, moving slowly along with the walls, and took in the rainy fresh air. Standing there it was clear that it was not just them, who were suffering in the darkness. The whole street was as black as the night.

A hand latched over her middle, pulling her to a manly embrace. Figuring it had to be Happy, she didn't bother with trying to turn around, "I'll press my heels trough your toes, if you don't step away from me immediately."

"Oh, c'mon baby, I paid good money to get in, I'm going to get what I came here for," an unexpected voice murmured in her ear. It was nothing like the raspiness that Happy possessed. "Don't worry, I'll pay you later, you little tight-assed slut," his other hand started ripping off her underwear.

Kicking her elbows into his ribs has strong as she could, Lexi was able to turn herself around. Only to stare into Larry's rage-filled eyes.

"Don't make me hurt you," Larry threatened, as he pushed her back against the table that stood in the middle of the porch and positioned himself between her legs which were trying hard to somehow kick him in his ugly face.

She was doing everything, including scratching and kicking, to get him off of her, but he was just that much stronger.

Lexi screamed for help, although the thunder was making it sound like nothing more than a weak whisper.

* * *

Thank you for reading! :)

So yeah it got a little dark, metaphorically as well as literally.. I'll try not to leave you hanging for long and update real soon!


	18. Never wanted you to know

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

"STOP!" Lexi begged.

"Shut it, bitch!" Larry's fist landed on her cheek.

He backed away from her for a second, just to get her underwear out of the way. With that she was able to kick him in the groin, as he was not putting any effort to pinning her down. She managed to hurt him enough to have him hunch down in pain and by that give her a chance to bolt for the door. However it still wasn't enough, Larry was back on his feet within seconds.

He got to Lexi just as she was able to open up the door just a little bit. Screaming on top of her lungs as he dragged her back to darkness of the porch, Lexi was about to give up. It felt like she was being struck with every single bolt of lightning that touched the ground. Lexi was so deep in her defeat and misery that she didn't even register when all of a sudden Larry was pulled away from her.

"You okay?" her savior asked. Lexi looked up to see the face of a guy who had gotten there just in time. If she hadn't been so freaked out by everything, she would have actually been more than surprised that it was Tig. As hard as she tried, words just didn't roll over her lips. Instead tears started welling up in her eyes as she watched Larry run away straight into the storm.

Tig tried to help her up from the floor that she had now sunk onto, but being touched by him made her cry out loud.

Suddenly the door opened again, this time with Happy barging through it. Although it was still so dark, Lexi was able to recognize him simply by his dark silhouette. Taking in the situation of Lexi crying on the floor and Tig crouching over her, he instantly pushed Tig away.

"What the fuck?" Happy slammed him against the wall.

"Calm down, man, I didn't do that to her,"Tig's voice was as angry as Hap's, "I fucking saved her ass."

As Happy let his hands drop from where they had been pinning Tig against the wall, he slowly turned around to look at the weeping stack of sadness. With a small nod she got up.

Happy took a step towards her. "Who was it?"

"A regular… Larry," she whispered between sobs.

"I will kill him," Happy growled, his face confirming the promise he had just made.

"Go inside and we'll take care of it," Hap's voice was as cold as a stone, although his eyes got a bit more gentle once they locked with hers.

In contrary to everything that had ever happened between them, he was the only person in that whole place she really felt safe with. At least at that moment and up to some extent.

Without thinking Lexi reached out and wrapped her fingers around his hand. Surprising herself just as much as him. Happy looked down at her tiny hands latched around his, holding on with a strength he didn't know she even had. As much as he wanted to go and murder that son of a bitch that had done that to her, he just couldn't force himself into pulling his hand away from her. He wasn't going to leave her.

For a second he had even forgotten about Tig's presence. Raising his gaze and casting a look at him, Tig had the most curious expression on his face. One that said he was not going to go into it right away, but he was definitely going to question him about it later.

"Why don't you take her home, bro, I'll pull some of the Devils and we'll find that fucker," Tig said with a hint of a sneaky smile playing on his lips.

Happy nodded. Although he really needed to hurt someone, he also needed to make sure she got home safe and sound.

"Let's go," he stared into her watery and frightened eyes.

"Need to get my things," she cleared her throat.

The electricity was still out, so they had to stumble their way back to the dressing room. She was still holding onto his hand. Not in a fingers-entwined lovey-dovey kind of way, but in a way that reassured her, that he was right behind her every step of the way in those dark hallways.

"Did he?" he asked as they got out of the building and were walking towards his bike.

"No," Lexi shook her head as she took the helmet he was holding out to her.

With a silent nod he motioned at her to get behind him. Other than asking her for the directions they didn't exchange a word until they were standing in front of her and Cherry's front door.

"I'll check it out," Happy stopped her from entering the apartment first.

She agreed and let him go in to take a look around, while patiently watching him from the hallway.

"All clear," he appeared from the last room, "who are you living with?"

"With a friend," Lexi leaned against the front door she had now closed behind her.

"Female?" he questioned.

"Yeah."

"Okay, give me your cell, I'll put in my number so you can call if there's anything," he held out his hand.

As she handed her phone to him, Lexi took a long look at the leather clad biker in front of her. How ironic it was that the guy that had been her personal prison guard had at some point turned into a man that was capable of calming her down with his mere presence.

"Stay," she said in a voice not much louder than a whisper.

His eyes that had just been glued to the screen in his hands were instantly back on her.

"I don't wanna be alone tonight," she dropped her eyes to the floor, unable to take on the intensity that his stare was applying.

"I'm no good at comforting," his normally gravelly tone was somehow smoother.

"I don't need comfort, I need to feel safe," Lexi gulped audibly, "and for some god damn reason I can't explain, right now I feel safe with you."

* * *

So short, I know, SORRY! It was either this now, or a longer wait, and I kind of promised to get this out soon. So here you go, hope you enjoy in nontheless.

Also would be so awesome if you'd let me know what you think Hap will answer, cause I for one still don't know.


	19. The way lost souls heal

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

"Have to take a call," Happy said, his eyes staying on hers. He waited for Lexi to nod, before he turned around and walked out the door. Lexi didn't miss the fact that he had not given her a straight answer, although simply by the way he had looked at her it was clear. He was going to stay.

She felt a shiver run through her body, due to the dampness of her clothes. When feeling dirty and cold, there was only one solution- a hot bath. She left her front door unlocked for Hap and went to the bathroom to put the water running.

Looking at the bathroom mirror was not a pretty sight. The sore spot on her cheek, where Larry's fist had landed, was starting to change color. She not only felt, but also looked terrible. Her eyes red from all that crying, her hair wet and messy and make up running all over her face. She stripped down and inspected her body. There were several bruises forming in places Larry had grabbed her. With a look like that there was no stripping in the near future, as even make up wouldn't be enough to hide all those terrible marks her body was covered in.

Cleaning up her face first, she stepped inside the tub, hoping that if she closed her eyes, she would somehow wake up with everything that had happened being just a horrible nightmare.

...

Happy slid his hand over his face, leaning onto his bike. There literally was nothing good in Lexi's life anymore. And as much as he tried to convince himself otherwise, he just couldn't stop caring about it. After all he was to blame, at least partially. They all were. Kidnapping someone's relative was a stupid move from the beginning. She had done nothing wrong and yet suffered for all that followed. It was driving him crazy. And then when he saw her down on the ground, half-naked and crying, with Tig crouching over her. He simply lost his shit.

The guy who had done that to her.. oh he was going to pay. And every bone in him was aching for him to be the one in charge of that retribution. But at the same time he couldn't just leave her all alone, even more so after she had asked him to stay. Probably for the first time in his life, he felt like choosing some bitch's needs over his own, and it scared him.

Whipping out his phone, he gave Tig a call.

"Hey man, we already have him," Tig said right after picking up, "idiot went straight home."

"Good, can you take care of it?" Happy hoped Tig wasn't going to go into all those questions he was probably dying to throw at him.

"Yeah, he'll never show his face in this town again," Tig said, "if he even has a face to show after tonight… I'm thinking of cutting something off, not sure yet what exactly."

"Oh yes you will," Happy stared at Lexi's windows just as one of them lit up, "see you tomorrow."

"You're staying with her? Really?" Tig couldn't help but ask.

"Yeah."

"Shit man, who is she? I'll find out one way or another." There was a hint of a smirk in Tig's voice. "And she can't be just someone you banged or want to bang, you don't get attached with those kinds."

"I'm not attached, I just owe her," Happy muttered. He really didn't want to explain any further. Really even if he wanted to, he couldn't. She was too tied up with SAMCRO already and he was going to his best to keep others from finding out who exactly she was.

"Yeah, yeah. We'll talk tomorrow, bro."

As Happy got back in, it was all too quiet. He peeked inside both bedrooms and she was in neither one. Just as he was about to turn around to head for the kitchen, he heard water splashing in the joining bathroom.

Without taking time to think about manners when it came to people's privacy, he straight up walked into the dimly lit room, finding Lexi lying in the tub, her eyes closed. She apparently hadn't bothered with bubbly stuff, as the water was so clear he could see every nuance of her perfectly curvy body.

She opened her eyes and looked at him, by that interrupting his ogling.

"It's taken care off, you'll never see that guy in this town again," Happy tried to focus his eyes on her face. Not that it helped with the growing tightness in his pants. He was dying to join her, but even he was not bold enough to make a move on her just a few hours after she was almost raped.

He reached for the door, turning his back to her.

"Happy," her voice made his head snap back. "Thank you," she said with absolute sincerity.

Giving her a small nod, he left her alone.

Taking off his hoodie that was soaking wet like everything else he was wearing, he wasn't exactly sure what to do next.

He grabbed himself a beer from the fridge and waited for her, flipping through channels.

…

"I don't really have men's clothing in here, but you can have one of those not-that-manly bathrobes in there while your clothes are in the dryer," she said standing in the doorway and pointing behind her.

"Feel free to raid the kitchen as well."

He stood and took of his kutte. Moving towards her, he pulled his white t-shirt over his head, by that letting her take in his tattooed torso. She let him get past her by going to the kitchen to grab herself some water. Partly cause she really was thirsty, partly because she needed an excuse not to stare at his half-naked hotness.

She almost cracked a smile once he appeared in her kitchen's doorway, wearing nothing but his black boxers. Apparently he didn't feel comfortable with those flowery bathrobes she had so generously offered.

"Happy.. I..," she started, eyeing him carefully, "I don't know what you think about all of it. Me asking you to stay here and everything… I just want you to be close to me tonight if that's okay with you."

"Lead the way." It for some reason sounded like a question.

Lexi took it as him agreeing to her terms- meaning that she just wanted him next to her in her bed, and not in her.

He looked anything but cuddly, so when he pulled her back to him, as they had gotten under the covers, she was more than surprised. He didn't even try anything with the hand that he had thrown over her. Actually he even made sure his man parts weren't exactly pressed against her. Lexi forced her eyes shut and hoped for sleep to take over.

She woke up early. It had been a dreamless and restless night, but still she felt fresh and calm. After all it could have all gone down way worse. And although it was Tig, who she really needed to thank, it was the man behind her back that had made her feel almost as if nothing bad had ever even happened.

He was still right there, in almost the same position. Only his hand had moved from her middle to her leg. Also unlike when they were falling asleep, now there was nothing separating her lower back from his definite hard-on.

She couldn't tell whether he was still sleeping or not. But by the way his fingers slightly slid along her leg, she was quite sure he wasn't.

Lexi moved her own hand over his. Raising it up a bit, she lifted her leg enough to make room for his hand between her thighs. As he gladly took over from there, it was no more a question whether he was up or not.

Slowly but firmly his hand moved until it met with her pajama bottoms. She pushed her hips up enough for him to pull them fully off.

His fingers went straight to work as they entered her folds from behind. She was already soaking wet and couldn't help but moan as he picked up a rhythm so wonderful it was like magic on her clit.

Leaving her on verge of almost getting to the cloud nine, his palm closed around her hip and pulled her, to her lay on her back.

His dark eyes were glowing with lust and excitement. As were hers probably. She reached for her silky black and white blouse and pulled it over her head, letting his eyes take in her bare breasts. Just as his left hand started taking care of one of her nipples, his mouth sucked on the other.

"I want you," Lexi moaned between short breaths, "inside."

His lips travelled up to her neck. With every kiss she felt a tremble run through her body.

As Happy's kisses made their way to her face, he positioned himself between her thighs, while at the same time helping his fully erect member out from his boxers and placing it right at her entrance.

"Condom," she whispered just as his mouth finally got to hers.

Not breaking apart from his lips, she reached for her bedside table's drawer to pull it out. He was working on putting it on before she even had the chance to protest at his mouth leaving hers.

Just as their lips locked again, Lexi felt him enter her in one smooth move. She whimpered as he started picking up speed. With every thrust he was hitting just the right spot and soon there was nothing she could do to stop herself from totally coming apart. Throbbing around him as he continued to work on his own release, he came with a grunt while she was still driving on her last pleasure waves.

"Let's take a bath," he said after a while, his lips tickling her throat as he spoke, "fucking can't get that sight of you in there out of my head otherwise."

With a snort she crawled out from underneath him.

Stopping with her back to him, she cast Happy a dirty glance over her shoulder that he didn't need words to translate. "You coming?"

It wasn't long before she could hear Hap close the bathroom door behind him. Lexi turned to him and wasn't disappointed. He was naked and already ready for the second round.

"It's only half-way full," she motioned to the bathtub.

With a wicked grin on his lips, he took a step towards her. Gently pushing back her curly red locks that were covering up her boob and letting his hands roam over her shivering body, he erased the distance between them.

She yelped in surprise as he picked her up and pinned her against the door. Allowing one of her legs to touch the ground, he started grinding against her, letting his impressive length tease her clit.

"Stay still," he ordered gruffly as she tried to move closer.

She opened her eyes, and they were hungry. There was no strength in her to keep herself still, as he was stroking her in all of those part that made her want to move and moan.

"Sorry, but no," she couldn't wait any longer. Wrapping her fingers around his cock, she helped herself onto him. He then took over, by slowly pressing himself so far in it almost hurt.

"Ohh, give it to me," she pleaded, surprising even herself with the hoarseness of her voice.

He exhaled sharply as he began pounding into her.

If there was one thing that guy could to, then it was rocking her world. As they were leaning against the door, being entwined with each other and breathing heavily, she couldn't think of a better place she could be.

"I think it's ready," she murmured into his ear.

"Get in," Happy commanded, pushing himself away from her.

Just as she was trying to do as he said, he stopped her. "Sorry about all this," he gently touched the sore spot on her cheek, which for sure was looking even nastier than it felt.

"Let's not ruin this right now," Lexi took his hand to make him follow her into the tub.

* * *

Too soon? I sure hope not. I think they both needed a bit of release from everything that's going on.

Also a very special thank you to everyone, who helped with brainstorming!

As always let me know what you think and I really hope you liked it.


	20. Crave you

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

AN: I stumbled upon this song- Jem- Falling for you. And I have to say it would be the theme song of this story if there would be such a thing.

The lyrics are practically about them. They are both so scared of their feelings and afraid to just let go and try, but at the same time also can't help but fall for each other. And the dark melody also fits so perfectly.. Okay anyways that's the song they're listening to.

* * *

"Gentlemen first," Lexi said, a wicked grin curling her lips as she watched the naked men beside her.

What was this feeling? Butterflies? That shit was wrong. It was just a hook-up. And yet suddenly it had started to mess with her head. Trying to distract herself from overanalyzing, Lexi decided to put on some music.

It was a slow rock song she couldn't remember the name of. Happy watched her quietly and she had a sudden urge to cover herself up. Which would have been stupid, considering everything they had just done and were probably going to do in the very near future.

Heading toward the tub, wanting to be at least under the water, she got confused for a second. Was she supposed to be across from him or directly in his embrace? She was starting to overthink again. _"Just get in and see which way the wind blows you," _she tried to encourage herself, throwing her leg over the edge.

As she was trying to positon herself so that they'd be facing each other, he softly grabbed her thigh, pulling her to him.

"Oh, okay," she got comfortable with her back against his chest.

He slid his palm across her middle and then upwards, cupping her boob and squeezing it lightly. She could hear him sigh behind her back and she was glad he didn't say a word. Words and thoughts were unnecessary and capable of ruining it all.

He caressed her, letting his hand travel along her body, until it took a vacation between her legs. She moaned, feeling his teeth bite down on her shoulder, as his finger teased her entrance.

_Coz I can feel it, baby_

_I feel like I'm falling for you_

_But I'm scared to, let go_

_I'm scared coz my heart has been hurt so_

She listened to the song that had just started playing, wondering if he was paying attention to the lyrics too.

A loud bang brought her out of her bubble. "Oh shit. Cherry," she realized and jumped up, splashing water all around them.

"And?" he looked confused.

"Don't want her to see you here, you have to go," she wrapped a towel around her dripping wet body and hurried out of the bathroom, leaving him all alone and scowling.

"Hey Cher! Congrats! Took some time, but at least you finally did find your way back here," Lexi chuckled lightly.

"Gee, what has gotten you so cheerful?" Cherry wondered, eyeing her with curiosity. "Oh god, what happened there?" she pointed at the bruise on her cheek.

"Larry happened," she shuddered at the memory. "Attacked me during the blackout, thankfully some guy heard my cries and got there in time."

"What? Oh god, that asshole. So sorry that happened to you, babe."

"Could have been worse, so yeah, I'm okay.. You heading in today?" Lexi tried to steer the conversation away from that topic.

"In a few hours, should get some sleep first. I'm a fricking zombie at this point. SAMCRO just left the building."

"And you stayed behind? Well anyhow go get some rest then," Lexi gave her a smile, wanting to avoid that topic as well.

"I will," with a long yawn, she opened the door to her room, "and I still want to hear everything about the car and all."

"Oh and hey, Lex," Cherry called out, stopping to cast a look back at her, "nice bike out there in our driveway by the way."

Lexi was speechless, she had totally forgotten about that. With a smirk Cherry disappeared inside her room. The way she knew everything about the MC world, she probably had also noticed the tags on it. SOA-tags.

"Fuck," she mumbled under her breath.

She had yet to come up with a good explanation for everything. And now the list of unexplainable things had expanded by one very specific motorcycle. _"Have to find myself a playwright who'd work everything in that list into one half-believable story," _she thought, unsure of what she should do next. Bath-time was officially over and Happy needed to go, that she was sure of.

She got out his clothes that were still in the dryer since the previous night. Gathering them into a ball in her hands, she went back to the bathroom. He hadn't moved a muscle.

"Got your clothes here," Lexi held them out to him like some kind of a peace offering.

"She already knows I'm here, so there's no reason to stop now," he rested his head on the edge of the tub and closed his eyes.

"You heard that?" She knew those walls were not that soundproof, but still. "Well considering the thickness of our walls there's even more reason for us to push the stop button and that here is my cue to leave you to get dressed."

"Fine," he got up. She would have been lying, if she had said she wasn't temped. And by the glint of satisfaction in his eyes as he stood there in front of her, letting her take in his naked body as he got out, it was clear he knew it too. He knew exactly what he was doing to her mind.

"Okay, bye then," she impatiently held the front door open for him once they were out of the bathroom. He was taking his time getting to it and it was excruciating.

Happy had blasted a smirk on his face that told her it was not the last time she was going to see him. He was not done with her. Not yet.

As she stood there, holding one hand on the door and the other on her hip, he took a step closer. Making it look like he was going to touch her cheek, he raised his hand, but it didn't end up on her face. Instead he moved it down, enough to get a good hold of her towel and yank it off totally.

Taking it with him, he left her standing in her hallway. Buck-naked. It took her a moment to realize what had just happened. And another to slam the door shut, before one of her neighbors accidentally happened to pass by. After all, she was not offering free shows.

…

It was the next day when her phone rang, as she was busy pretending to watch the TV, while in reality she was silently threading the moment Cherry would wake up and attack her with questions she couldn't and wouldn't answer.

"Yea?"

"How are you?" Needles spoke on the other end.

"I'm okay, a bit blue and purple at places, but other than that I'm fine," she said honestly. She really was fine, up until the moment her mind started re-living the awful memory.

"That problem is all taken care of, don't worry about seeing him ever again."

"I know. Thank you for handling it. I'm guessing you're also calling about work?"

"I am. Are you okay with working here even after that incident?"

"When life knocks you down, you can't stay down. By that I mean that I'll hit the stage as soon as I'm presentable again."

"Could you come in to work the room tonight, not the stage? Lisa just called in sick."

"I have a real shiner on my face, but if I'd put on a costume that comes with some sort of a mask, then we could make it work I guess."

"Good-good, see ya later then, darling." Lexi could hear the relief in his tired voice.

"See ya."

She wasn't really looking forward to going back to work so soon, but at least it gave her another opportunity to dodge from Cherry's questions. Plus a reason to go shopping.

It turned out not to be such an easy quest, finding a proper strip club worthy costume with a mask. Especially in such a short notice. As she was not planning on looking either like a trick-or-treater or a sparkling ball queen, and yet those were only kinds Lexi could find, it was a pure luck when she accidentally dropped her eyes on a lower self and noticed something black and lacey. Picking it up, it was perfect. She put the mask on, to see if it even covered anything, and stood in front of the mirror that was placed between the shelves.

"She looks pretty, daddy, I want that, but in pink. And with flowers," a whispering voice commented. Searching for the source through the mirror, Lexi noticed a tiny girl pointing at her.

"I'm not sure if they have it in pink, sweetie," the man holding onto her hand said.

"But they have a similar one in white, and you can draw your own pink flowers on it," Lexi turned around and smiled at the little one.

"How does that sound, Ally?" her father asked, bending down to see her daughter's face lit up with a smile as she nodded franticly.

"Thank you so much, we've been searching for something like that for hours. She wants to look extra pretty for her eight birthday party."

"Glad I could help," Lexi gave the father a smile, while removing her mask.

"And mind if I say, my daughter was right, you looked really beautiful with that mask… as well as without," the dark-haired man said, flashing his pearl white teeth. Keeping his smile on as he held her gaze, he added, "your face looks familiar, do I know you from somewhere."

With that last line her smile disappeared. "Are you kidding me? Yes, I work at Maid of Night, and I doubt my face was the thing that looked familiar to you. The fact I dance there doesn't make me a hooker who would fall for clever lines and wouldn't care that you have your child with you, you bastard," she scowled at him.

"Fuck you," she muttered and took off right before his daughter got back to where they were standing with a white mask in her hand and a smile blasted on her face.

It was not the first time that some guy who had recognized her from the club had come up to her, thinking she was an easy lay.

Feeling annoyed, she paid for the mask and went straight to the club.

…

After a few hours of preparations, the night was in full swing. She helped with taking drinks to the tables, as well as entertaining customers with some sweet talk and light lap dances. Needles had talked other girls into wearing masks as well and it actually looked great. Gave the whole place a mysterious vibe.

Alongside with the black and lacey mask, Lexi was wearing a black mini-dress with a low cut back. She had decided to straighten her red hair and put on some rather heavy eye makeup.

She was in the middle of walking back to the bar, when she noticed the guy she had told off walk in.

"Are you serious?" she met him half way.

"Can I just explain? Just hear me out and I'll go," he motioned at her to sit down.

"I'm listening," she crossed her arms and decided not to move.

"Okay here's the thing. I've never been here, honestly. I came here simply because you told me you worked here and I hoped to catch you here, to explain. I figured out where I know you. I'm a doctor and I remember you coming in with one of my patients, Rita, a few weeks ago when she sprained her ankle."

"I see," Lexi nodded, keeping her gaze on the ground.

"And for the part of me giving you a compliment, while my kid was just a few steps away from us, I'm a single father and it's hard to meet new people with her and a fulltime job, so as I felt like you were a genuinely nice person, I though why not try to get acquainted. I'm sorry, if I somehow managed to insult you. I just wanted to come clear about it and I can go now, if you want me to."

Feeling stupid and judgmental, she gave him a wry smile. "Now I feel kind of bad, jumping into conclusions like that, can we just pretend that never happened and I'll get you a drink?"

"That would be really nice," he smiled, "I'm Ben by the way."

"Lexi," she shook his hand.

They had been talking for over an hour, with her occasionally going to other tables, when she saw Happy walk in with some other local guys from his MC. Lexi noticed him look as if he was searching for something. Once his eyes found her, he stopped his scanning. Sitting down in a separated booth with the others, he kept on staring her way.

Lexi tried not to look at Hap. She was talking to another person and it would have been rude.

Ben was a nice guy. She could tell it fifteen minutes into the conversation. He even looked quite uncomfortable with their surroundings, as men's occasional roars pulled his attention to the stage, where Nora was rolling around in nothing but her G-string.

From her peripheral vision she saw Happy coming up to them just as Ben took her hand in his.

"So I'm just going to say it, so here it goes," he looked nervous holding onto her hand, "I'd like to take you out somewhere nice."

"Oh... okay, why not," she grinned, feeling him ease up instantly. She couldn't even remember the last time she was on a proper date and she was actually looking forward to it.

Lexi turned her head just in time to see Happy come to a halt in front of her. Reaching out, he grabbed a hold of her arm and pulled her up, "come with me."

"What? No!" she resisted his attempt to lead her away from Ben.

"The lady said no," Ben stood up facing Happy.

She had to give him points for his courage, Happy looked murderous and a second away from snapping, and most guys would simply not have stepped against a man like him.

"It's okay, give me a call tomorrow," she smiled at Ben apologetically, while pushing Happy backwards. She simply didn't want to see the bloodbath Happy was probably preparing for in his mind, so it was easier to go with him.

Pulling him to the back of the room, where there were several empty couches, she suddenly stopped, letting go of him and crossing her arms over her chest.

"You can't do that, come here and drag me away whenever you want," she was furious.

"I can and I will," he glared at her.

"I'm not some pony you can buy, ride and own."

"Let's go sit down," his started pulling her again.

"No, let go of me. I will come with you, but if try to drag me again, I'll kick and scream."

He snorted, but eventually let go. Lexi looked behind, Ben was already gone and she was not so sure he would call her after all. Especially when taking account the scene Hap had just arranged.

He slumped down on one of couches and against her better judgment, she followed him to it. Without a warning Happy reached out and pulled Lexi down, making her straddle him.

"This is my job," she made point to look in his eyes saying that. But it was hard to keep her thoughts as she could feel his hands travel along her bare legs up to her hips. "And if you want my company, then even you have to wait, just like any other one in here," she finished her sentence.

"What were you talking about with that guy? Why should he call you tomorrow?"

"Cause he asked me out and I said yes."

"You wanna date that douche?"

"Maybe," she stared at him, "ain't really any of your business though."

She almost cracked a smile seeing his brows furrow.

"Is this any of my business?" Happy asked, taking his right hand off her hip and putting it between her legs.

"Definitely not the right time or place," she tried to get off his lap, but his other hand was holding her still.

"You sure?" he slid his hand up and underneath her dress.

"I am.. mmh," she moaned as his finger pushed her clit through the fabric of her thongs. She was already wet.

"This is a place for imagination only, so no touching, aammh, don't say that I didn't warn you when one of the bouncers throws your sorry ass out of here, mmmm," she tried not to react at his finger drawing circles on her most sensitive spot.

He didn't answer and she was forced to open her eyes and look at him to see the reason of his sudden silence. He was looking down at where his fingers were dancing on her, a devilish grin on his lips. With the hand he had used to hold her in place, he lifted the front of her dress up, enabling him to see her black and red thong for a second, before he pulled it down altogether. Leaving her bare-bottomed and with a finger slowly moving up and then inside her. All that in a room full of people.

She glanced over her shoulder. Thankfully everyone else seemed to be concentrating on the stage show. "_Thank you, Destiny!" _Lexi thought as Happy pushed in another finger.

She couldn't keep herself from moaning and whimpering as he was driving her straight to Nirvana, neither could she keep herself still, and it seemed like he was enjoying it just as much as she did.

She couldn't take much longer and once she saw the hungry look on his face, she came, contracting around the fingers that were still inside her.

"Now THAT you should do on that stage. Just wonderful," she heard someone say behind her back.

Turning around she saw Tig stand there, clapping his hands and grinning, and there was no way Happy hadn't seen him come up to them. She instantly jumped off him and started adjusting her clothes.

"You jerk," she shouted at Happy before storming off.

* * *

This turned out so long.. for me at least. So as always I hope you like it and I'd love to hear you thoughts about the ending and also about Ben and oh well everything else too :D!

AND if by any chance you still feel like reading something more from me, then I would selfishly like to announce here that I started a new story- "Far from never". So if you have the time and interest, then go check out that one too.

Enjoy your weekend!


	21. Bad moon rising

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

She had reached a whole new level of embarrassment. Yeah, she had willingly gone along with it, well knowing that there were people around them, but still he had intentionally let Tig see it all. And she was mad… Fucking furious really. Wishing she'd had the sense to give him a slap across his smug face, Lexi promised herself it was the end of their little thing. Whatever it had been, it was over now.

Looking at the clock in the dressing room and wishing it was closing time, she groaned in frustration. The night was far from over. She was bound to see him again, even if not right away, then on some other day. And guessing that since the moment Happy had arrived in Indian Hills it had been a god damn rollercoaster, it was probably going to continue the same way, until he eventually went back to where he belonged. The problem was that she had no clue of how long he was going to stay here or how she was going to avoid him during that time.

…

"Oops, my bad, bro," Tig threw up his hands looking at the back of the girl who'd just yelled in Hap's face. Man did she storm off angry. "Was she the one I saved the other night?"

Happy knew it had been a real dick move, but he had his reasons. First of all he just couldn't stop himself once he saw she was so close, even as he could already guess at that point that she'd freak out knowing that Tig had seen it all.

The other reason was the simple fact that he just wanted to give her something to remember him by, when she went out with that dipshit. That stupid motherfucker who'd had the audacity to stand up against him. Where did he think they were? In some Hollywood movie where the good guys eventually still won, no matter what the odds? No. Fucker was not realizing how things worked in reality. Happy would have snapped him like a twig, if he had taken another step forward or if Lexi hadn't intervened by dragging him away from that idiot.

Maybe there was a third reason, him wanting to punish her for accepting that shitheads invitation, but on that idea he did not want to dwell on. He wasn't jealous after all. She was just a good lay he didn't seem to get enough off and she was also simply the girl he wanted to repay, for what she had done for him, and that was all. He definitely was not jealous because he had feelings for her. He wasn't even that sure of his ability to feel romantic feelings other than what his dick occasionally made him feel.

Looking at Tig stand with his hands up, as if someone had their gun pointed at him, he stood up as well. "Yeah she was and it's all good, bitch got what she wanted from me."

"And YOU got nothing," Tig scoffed at him.

"I got plenty," he looked around to see if she was anywhere in sight.

"So what's the deal with her, where do you know her from?"

He wasn't going to lie to his brother, but he was also not going to put Lexi's life in danger again. So he decided on giving him an answer that was the truth, but not all of it. "Banged her at the patch-over party."

"She any good? I'd love to push up on that one," Tig daydreamed.

As much as it made his insides wince, he couldn't tell Tig straight up front that he for some reason didn't want anyone other than himself around her. But thankfully knowing she'd say no to him anyways, no matter how much he tired, he gave Tig a shrug saying, "You can try."

Plus she had also been right about one thing, he did not own her. Even as he did think so at times, she was not his Old Lady. Not even a regular fuck he could tell his brothers about. She was his dirty little secret.

"Anyways I actually wasn't planning on heading over here to just cock-block you, I got a call from Jury. Shit's about to go down with Mayans."

"Those fuckers never learn. Let's go," Happy patted his pocket to make sure his gun was ready for some action.

…

Thankfully Happy and Tig had both taken off by the time she got out of the dressing room. Faking a few smiles and putting on some flirtatious banter, Lexi couldn't wait for the night to be over. She hadn't even made any real money. Because of different reasons she hadn't really managed to work her way through the well paying customers circle. Counting the dollars she had made, Lexi angrily shoved them into her purse along with her other things, before going out to hail herself a cab.

She was asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow. It had been that kind of a night. She hadn't even bothered with taking off her clothes or removing the smudged make-up.

She woke up with a headache. Well actually without one, but right after she started thinking about the previous night, it was there..

She took a long, hot shower, whishing Cherry had made some coffee and then gone out. She really wasn't feeling like facing another person. Putting on a bathrobe, she dragged her feet to the kitchen. The coffee pot was hot a full, so at least one of her prayers had been answered. The other one though… Cherry was sitting at their kitchen table, looking her way with eagerness in her eyes.

"Morning hon, sit and start spilling the beans," she kicked a stool toward her with her leg, not waiting for her answer.

"Can't it wait? I had a rough night," Lexi filled her cup with steaming black liquid and mixed it with milk before sitting down.

"Oh I bet you did, but I have already waited, so no," she smiled at her weirdly, as if hinting to something or rather someone.

"Fine, what do you want to know?" A part of her wanted to avoid topics like that with all costs, another wanted to just get it over with. At least that ways she wouldn't have to avoid Cherry no more.

"Let's start with my car, what happened there?"

There was a long pause before Lexi finally opened her mouth. Lies were burying her and she needed to drop them not create new ones. Also she still hadn't really thought of a lie that would make sense. So half-truths were all she had to give her.

"I needed to get away from the clubhouse… because I saw them… saw him."

"Saw who?" Cherry was literally sitting on the edge of her seat.

"Sons," she took a silent sip from her mug, "I kind of knew them before I came here. I'm on the outs with the club, so I beg of you not to talk to any of them about me. They didn't recognize me and I'd like it to stay that way."

"What happened? What about the guy who was here the other night?"

"I can't really tell what happened there and I'd appreciate if you wouldn't ask. I just need to stay under the radar, it's not like they're searching for me or anything, but still," Lexi watched Cherry nod in agreement, " about the guy… well he was the only one who did recognize me, he and I had a thing I guess, so I think he won't say anything to the others." At least she hoped he wouldn't.

"Had a thing? You were his Old Lady?" Cherry fired questions her way.

"Oh no-no, definitely not. We just hooked up a few times, but like I said, they're not searching for me, so I don't think he'd specifically point me out to club, no real reason to do that."

At least so she had though up until this point. Happy wouldn't do that to her.. or would he? All the things she had just said to Cherry, about Sons not searching for her and it not being that serious in general, it had been more in the lines of reassurance to Cherry than anything she herself was sure of. Mainly just so that Cherry wouldn't think she's on some kind of a Son's hit list that could hurt her as well, forcing her into doing something stupid because of that.

In reality she had no idea what they had decided on the club level. Would they deal with her somehow, if others besides Hap found out she's here? Or would they just leave her be? After all nothing had changed, she hadn't said a word. How could she, when in the end she was basically just a guilty as they were. But maybe to them she was still a threat? She just didn't know and exactly because of that it was safer to remain hidden.

Or maybe it was time for her to change the scenery again? Because even if Hap and Tig went back to Charming, Devil's Tribe was now officially Sons of Anarchy, which meant that this was probably not the last time guys from mother charter came up for a visit. If that was the deal, then there were things she really needed to think through.

"I just want to distance myself from them as much as possible, so I hope I don't have to regret telling you this. I really hope I can trust you, Cher."

"Of course, babe. I'm just glad you finally opened up a bit." Cherry took her hand in hers. "And maybe someday you'll tell me about everything else as well. Like who's that mystery Son you've been playing nasty with. With details," Cherry winked at her.

"Maybe," Lexi answered, although knowing for sure that she would never be able to tell her everything.

…

She had a day off and it surprised her when her phone went off later that afternoon. It was an unknown number and Lexi instantly thought of just ignoring it. Then again it could have been Needles or someone else from the club calling her from a prepay. It had happened before.

"Yes?"

"Hi, Lexi. Can you talk?" a man on the other end asked.

"Mm, sure, but who is this?" Lexi wondered, as she couldn't place the voice.

"It's Ben, remember from the last night?"

"Oh, Ben. So sorry, I thought you weren't going to call after that incident."

"No, a promise is a promise," he chuckled lightly, "So I was wondering if you're free today. Or tomorrow? Or if you're even still interested."

She couldn't help but like the way he seemed a bit nervous even through the phone. Being around macho men who worked hard to maintain their image as confident bad-boys, it was really sweet and refreshing. "I'd love to. What time are you picking me up?"

"How about around eight?" Ben asked.

"Wonderful," Lexi could feel a smile forming on her lips. She was really looking forward to it. Looking forward to someone to keep her mind away from Happy and the shit that came with him. She gave him her address and pried a little about where they were going, so she'd know what to wear.

"I'm sure you'll look elegant and beautiful in anything, so it really doesn't matter."

"If you say so, see you later then," she grinned at his compliment.

He was charming. And she couldn't stop herself from comparing every aspect of him with Happy. Who of course was far from charming, but then again won when it came to being sizzling hot and making her pant from just thinking about him.

But then again as much as her body yearned for Happy to win it all, her brain knew there was no future with him, never were, so why prolong the inevitable.

Lexi was ready well before eight. She had put on a little black dress that was conservative in a way that it was almost down to her knees, but then again it showed off her cleavage. In a tasteful way. Paired with black pumps, silver accessories and curly hair-do, she was all ready to go out and have a great evening.

Ben was there exactly at eight. As he walked up to her compartment building's door, Lexi eyed him from her second floor window. He looked handsome with his well-fitting navy blue suit.

She met him half-way down and unlike what she had come accustomed to, he didn't stop to ogle at her boobs, instead he greeted her with a kiss on her cheek, before taking her hand and helping her to the car.

"There's a table waiting for us at this restaurant I really think you're going to like," Ben said as he drove them to the place.

Looking down at her lap, she thought about how great it was he had come with a car. Otherwise that dress would have been a nightmare. All of a sudden the stupidity of her thoughts caught up with her. She was not going out with a biker. Of course Ben was going to pick her up with a car. Why was she even thinking about bikes and dresses?

They got to the restaurant and she had to agree. She did like it. It was fancy and full of people looking just as good. For a second she almost felt like she could belong there. Be one of the rich and glamorous. Then the reality crashed down. Yeah, she could pretend she wasn't a stripper, even quit her job and actually not be one, but being an unpunished murdered, that was something she was going to carry with her for the rest of her life, and it definitely didn't help her blend in with the fancy crowd.

"This way, miss," the waitress pulled her out of her thoughts. Well even as it was not a place for the likes of her, she was at least going to try to enjoy her date.

"You look really beautiful, I think I'll have to thank my daughter again for getting your attention," Ben said as he held out a chair for her.

"Thank you," Lexi smiled, feeling a flush reach her cheeks. He was drowning her in the sea of compliments.

"So how long have you been a single father?" she couldn't keep the words from flying over her lips. She really was rusty when it came to dating. "Geez, sorry, didn't mean to attack you like that, I'm bad at this, you don't have to answer," she felt embarrassed.

"No, it's okay. Her mother and I split ways when she was three, which means it's been just the two of us for five years already," Ben smiled, unfazed by her bluntness. "But what about you, were you born here?"

"No, I recently moved here from a little town called Charming," she hoped for there to be no follow-up questions about the reasons why she moved.

"And how do you like it so far?" Ben continued, as if feeling her past was a touchy subject. Unlike her, he was not trying to start it of like an interrogation.

"It's quite peaceful." Well at least in contrast to Charming, which was not so charming and peaceful after all.

He was good a keeping the conversation light and fun. By the time they were finished with eating, she was actually really glad she'd agreed to going out with him. Ben was not only polite and decent, he was also fun. As they were walking back to his car, she actually felt her cheeks hurt from all that smiling.

"I had a really nice time with you," Lexi looked at him, as they were just about to turn to her street.

"Me too and I really hope that this won't be the last time…"

She didn't even hear the end of his sentence, as her mind was only focused on one thing- a bike parked in her driveway with a dark figure leaning over it. _"Oh no!" _she felt like everything good about that evening was about to crash down… hard.

"You know that guy? Is it the one from last night?" Ben asked, looking at Lexi for answers.

"Yeah."

She got out of the car and for a moment forgot about Ben's presence. "Why are you here?" she demanded stopping in front of Happy.

"Needed to see you. How was your little date with mister perfect?" he glowered at Ben who had come up to stand next to her.

"Great and now that you've seen me and have all your answers, could you please get the hell out of here?"

"Sure," he stood up and she could see the nearly empty whiskey bottle in his hand, "don't want to keep you from showing him what's underneath that pretty little dress of yours."

"Hey man, a little respect for the lady," Ben stepped in front of her.

"Phhf, yeah she's a real classy lady," Happy snorted.

It happened all so fast, but by the time she could react, Ben had pushed him. Happy staggered a few steps back, before he started coming at Ben with murder in his eyes.

"STOP," she yelled, getting between them.

"Get out of the way," Happy growled, trying to push her to the side.

As he raised his arm, Lexi could see the white T-shirt underneath his kutte. Well it used to be white, at that moment it was more red than white actually.

"You're bleeding," Lexi gasped.

* * *

THANK YOU for the awesome feedback I got for the previous chapter. I love to hear your thoughts!

I hope you also liked this chapter. Feel free to let me know what you think about Happy's justifications for his actions in the last chapter and Lexi's date with Ben.

Until next time! :)


	22. Remember the threat

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

"Why are you bleeding?" she gawked at him with wide eyes, while reaching out to his kutte to see better.

"It's nothing, get out of my way," Happy didn't remove his eyes from Ben.

"It is not nothing if your shirt is so red that I'm afraid it might attract bulls from across the Atlantic Ocean," she was helpless with pushing back Happy, so she instead backed up against Ben to make him move further away from Hap's reach. "A gunshot?" she demanded, trying to avert Happy's attention from his attempt to get to Ben.

"No," he growled, finally taking a second to look at Lexi.

"Let me see," she saw an opportunity to force Happy to stand still.

He mumbled something, as she lifted up his blood-soaked shirt, but didn't push her away.

"Fuck, were you stabbed? Why didn't you go to the ER?" she eyed the bloody band-aid right under his smiley face tattoos. Whatever wound was underneath it, it was definitely not stitched up.

"Not your problem, it'll heal on its own."

She threw a glance over her shoulder, Ben seemed calm and collected, but there was something sad in the look he gave her.

"Could you take a look?" she asked. Saying it out loud felt just as bad as she had imagined. Yeah Ben definitely wanted to use his medical skills on a guy who had his fists ready for a meet-up with his face.

"Sure," Ben nodded, although he didn't bother with trying to hide the resentment on his face.

"I fucking dare you to put your hands on me again," Happy glared at Ben, as he shoved down the shirt Lexi had been holding up.

"Just shut up, if you're stupid enough not to go to the ER on your own, then you're going to let him stich you up," she waved a finger at him.

Happy's face was a picture of outrage and for a second she really regretted her courage to say all that to his face, but as he didn't bounce on her and just continued giving both her and Ben his death glares, she knew that even as he was not exactly backing down, he was at least willing to call out a temporary truce.

"Let's continue this show inside, why don't we… I'd hate to explain all this to Ms. Greenday who's bound to appear on her window any second now."

"I'll get my medical kit," Ben motioned at his car.

Lexi mouthed him a silent thank you, before following Happy inside.

...

_**5 hours earlier **_

"Get the bikes in," Jury told the prospects.

A snitch had warned them about the upcoming Mayan attack. It had been brewing for days, since the patch over had become public. Mayans were far from pleased with Sons permanent presence in Indian Hills. It had been their territory in which Tribe was just a low-key player. Now however, since the Devil's Tribe was an official SOA charter, the peace or rather Mayan domination was over.

They'd had almost 12 hours to prepare and that time had been essential. They didn't have the manpower, but they did have the element of surprise.

"You hear that?" Needles looked at Jury as the familiar sound reached their ears.

"Alright, everyone ready?" Jury asked.

Their plan was to box them in, fire from two sides. And it had all turned out more or less the way they had wanted. Mayans didn't see it coming and as soon as they did, they were desperate to get the hell out of there.

Happy and Tig were both on the outside when the action kicked off. Once Mayans got the clear picture of how they had been trapped, they were quick to turn their bikes around. Happy saw one of them drive right past him and without really thinking, he jumped at him, pushing him off of his bike. However the guy was quick to grab for his knife, while at same Happy was having a hard time getting to his, as the gun in his hands had flown out of his grip during his daredevil stunt. Before he could even get up, the little Mayan shithead had managed crawl onto him to drag his cutter over his abdomen.

Happy pushed him off and reached for the gun that was laying not that far from him. But before he could get to it, there was a bang. The Mayan guy wasn't going to get up again.

Happy turned his head to see Tig with his arm held out for him.

"I got you, bro," Tig helped him up.

It had been stupid to try a stunt like that, when he could have just shot him off of his bike, but for some reason he was off his game and his mind was full of clouds hindering his ability to think straight.

"How deep?" Tig asked, helping Hap inside. The Mayans who'd been lucky enough to dodge their bullets were all gone and the ones who weren't were lying dead on the ground. Other than Happy no one on their side had been injured.

"Just a slash," Happy inspected the blood oozing line under his shirt.

"You sure? Looks nasty," Needles handed Hap a bottle of Jack, while some sweetbutt hurried over to dress the wound.

"Yeah, I'm good," Happy raised the bottle to his lips.

"What the fuck was that?" Tig appeared next to him a little while later, keeping his voice low.

"Nothing, thought I'd get him," Happy shrugged. The sudden movement had been a mistake. Even as the blade hadn't gone that deep, it still hurt like a bitch and the pills the girl had given him had yet to kick in.

"Talked to Clay, he thinks we should head back to Charming with the shipment tonight, now that Mayans are licking their wounds and all, think you can ride?" Tig had slumped down next to him.

"I guess, but I need to finish something here before, might take some time, I'll catch up with you later," Happy was now gulping down whiskey like it was water for multiple reasons. First of all it helped with the pain. Second of all it helped him to get ready to deal with that unfinished business of his. Shit he'd done in the strip club was becoming more stupid with every minute he spent thinking about it. Mainly cause it was making getting back on Lexi's good side that much harder and he needed to do that tonight, if he was going to go back to Charming tomorrow.

He needed a proper good-bye with her. And even though he should have gone with his brothers, it wasn't like they weren't protected. While Tig and Juice took the truck, they had Tacoma guys securing them from back and front. He wasn't needed there as much as he himself needed the last night with her.

"Even with Mayans out of the way for a while, you shouldn't ride alone at night right now," Tig cast him a look that almost came off as sincere worry.

"I'll wait for the morning light, mom," Happy snorted.

If it was his last time with her, then hell yeah he was going to have a whole night full of activity and not just a quickie.

"Oh ohh I get it now, you're going to see that pussy of yours?" Tig smirked. "Where and when? Loved your last show, didn't think you'll get another chance after that though…"

"Fuck you," Happy pushed himself up. Sex was going to be painful with that gap in his stomach, but still definitely worth it.

As he got to her house, he could already feel the cut bleeding through the bandage. But it didn't matter. He was going to have her. For the last time. She was going to be his.

But she was not answering her god damn phone, nor was she home. That much he did manage to find out, when that tart from the clubhouse that Lexi lived with passed by him. So he just waited, smoking and finishing the bottle he had taken with him, until she finally appeared with that fucker from the previous night.

…

_**Present **_

"What?" she couldn't help but ask after what felt like a shower of glares from Happy.

He opened his mouth to answered, but closed it when he saw Ben enter the kitchen.

"Take your shirt off," Ben ordered, laying out the things he needed.

The air in that small room was so full of hostility that she decided to take a little breather in the living room, while at the same time praying for those two to not go at each other's throats when she's not there to break it up. Lexi sat down on the couch and with a heavy sigh rubbed her temples.

When she opened her eyes up again, her gaze focused on the table, where there was a note from Cherry. She raised her eyebrow and took it in her hands. They never left notes like that to each other.

_Hey, babe! I couldn't reach you on the phone so I left you this sorry little note. So long story short, what I didn't get to tell you the other night was that I actually met this awesome guy at the Tribe's patch over party. He's a prospect in Charming and I decided to hitch a ride with the Sons who are heading out tonight. I don't know if I'm coming back or not, all I know is that I have to go and see if it could be something real. I really think he could be the one for me. We'll figure something out about the apartment, if I'm actually going to stay there. I'll give you a call tomorrow. _

_Oh btw, in case he's gone by the time you get back here, your biker-boy has been waiting for you in our driveway over an hour already. Nice catch, hon. Never thought you'd go for the scary-looking ones. _

_Cherry, _

_Xx_

Cherry had gone to Charming? Sons were heading out tonight? Why was Happy here then? He'd been waiting for her so long? Cherry was possibly not coming back?

A thousand questions bounced around in her head and she simply didn't have the energy to process them all. So she just shoved them all to the depths of her mind and reluctantly went back to the kitchen.

She gulped as her eyes travelled along Happy's tattooed chest. Even with a bloody cut on him, he looked smoking hot. Did he really come here to say good-bye?

Ben was just finishing with the stiches, when his phone rang.

"Think you can figure out how to put this on yourself?" Ben practically threw the bandage on Happy's lap, before removing his gloves and answering his cell. As Ben disappeared to the hallway, Lexi moved to Happy.

Taking the bandage from his hands, she gently placed it on the stiches.

"We need to talk." It was not a request, nor a command. It was somewhere in between, but Lexi knew she needed that conversation just as much as he did, so she decided to go along with it and nodded.

"It was my daughter, I have to go," Ben stood in the doorway, "you gonna be okay here?"

"Yeah," Lexi walked to him, aware of Happy's eyes burning holes in her back.

"I'll give you a call tomorrow," Ben bend down, making it look like he was about to kiss her cheek.

However he was far from the cheek area. The kiss landed right on her lips and she could have sworn she heard a real animal growl coming from Happy's throat.

"I'll let myself out," he made sure to grin at Happy, before heading for the door.

…

_**The next morning in Charming**_

"What's she doing here?" Clay demanded from Juice, seeing Cherry coming out from the truck.

"She said she wanted a ride," Juice started babbling.

"I know I'm not supposed to be her, I just need to talk to someone," Cherry hurried to them.

"There's no-one here you need to talk to, you get that, sweetbutt?" Clay was clearly furious.

"Please, I just.." she started, but Clay was already walking away from there.

"Get her out of here," Clay shouted over his shoulder to Juice.

"But I… Clay… I have some information," she called over her shoulder as Juice dragged her in the opposite way.

"What information," Clay spun around.

"About a girl you might be looking for… Lexi," Cherry felt like the worst person in the whole white word, but it was either this or her not even getting a chance to see Half-Sack.

* * *

Quite packed chapter, right? I did some time-jumping here and there, hope you didn't mind.

So now the real question is, will she really tell Clay where Lexi is? And how will the good-bye scene end? You'll find out in the next chapter. ;)

And as I was asked how often do I usually update, then I'd say you will find it all out probably after 3-4 days. So in August?

Anyhow I hope you enjoyed it and I'd appreciate your feedback.

Have a nice week in the meanwhile!


	23. Don't leave the light on when I'm gone

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

**AN: Okay, so this took a bit longer than expected. Sorry about that!**

* * *

"Let's talk then," Lexi said, leaning back on the doorway she was still standing in.

Happy just glared at her without saying a word.

"Do I need to remind you that you were the one who came here for a chat?" she quirked an eyebrow.

He shifted uncomfortably before opening his mouth. "Don't think that your boyfriend's going to get away with it just like that."

"Get away with what? Patching you up?" she couldn't believe his ingratitude.

He on the other hand couldn't believe she hadn't reacted to the boyfriend tag at all. Fucking hell, he had pointedly let the B-word drop and she didn't even flinch.

"Is that all you wanted to say? Cause I'm tired and frankly not up to having this conversation with you right now," Lexi rolled her eyes at the half-naked guy sitting in her kitchen.

"No," he responded, rubbing a hand over his head.

"I'll go get you a clean shirt or something then," she said, afraid that she might give in to his naked hotness otherwise, "so you can ride home all warm and fuzzy."

A glint of a smirk on Happy's face made clear that her face had definitely given away the real reason behind her sudden offer.

"No need," he shook his head, obviously enjoying the way her eyes seemed to fail when trying to avoid staring at his ink-covered muscles. So he did have a chance here after all, even if she considered that fucker to be her boyfriend and all.

Happy stood up, feeling a sharp pain run through him with the movement, and took a few steps in her way.

"Don't," she held out a hand to stop him from getting even closer.

"What you're trying here, that ain't talking, and in that case you can just go. But if you do have something to share, then I'm one big ear," she said, taking a step away from him by backing to the hallway.

She could feel his need to snap at her, but something was holding him back from doing it. So instead he just looked like he had smelled rotten tomatoes and wanted to barf. Leaving him to collect his thoughts or whatever the hell went on behind those dark eyes of his, Lexi moved to the living room.

"I came to say good-bye," he finally grunted, following her to the other room.

"Okay, bye then," she turned her back to him, afraid that with looking straight at him she'd just forget about all those reasons that made this thing they had a really bad idea.

"And that I didn't have to let Tig see you like that," he said so silently that she just had to spun around to see if it even was him talking or just the wind coming in through the window crack.

"Was that a biker version of an apology? You didn't have to do it? I'd say that's an understatement," Lexi blinked at him.

"I don't believe in apologies, won't change shit, I'm just saying that I know I didn't have to do that," he replied in his raspy voice, causing her to snort out loud.

"Geez," she burst into laughter, "and all this time I was here thinking you had to do it, what's wrong with me… Thanks for clearing it up." Unable to control her chuckling, she continued, "And might I say- wow, just wow, with word-choosing ability like yours, in another life you would have made a great politician."

"What do you want me to say here?" he didn't find any of this funny.

"Just be honest with me, I don't care if you apologize or not, you're right, it wouldn't change a thing. But even as you do admit you didn't have to do what you did, there must have been a reason. What was it? Did you just want to humiliate me? Show everyone what a man you were, managing to get your hand up my skirt just like that? What? What was it huh?" she demanded, peering at him.

"Nothing, I just went with it," he studied her face to see if she believed his bullshit of a lie.

"Don't give me that crap. Just say it out. Be a fucking man and admit it," she looked more like an angry bee than anything else at that point.

"Fine, I wanted you to have something do remember me by when you went out with that douche and so I couldn't stop even as I saw Tig watching us," Happy finally admitted with a growl, looking past her and out the window.

Even as the women inside her heart cheered for the jealousy she had brought out in him, the women occupying her brain thought it was far from an acceptable way to show affection to a woman, no matter how jealous he got. "Fucking man-brain, just so you'd know, everything I've thought about you in those past few days can be summed up in one word- anger, and not 'oh god, I wish I had your hands on me again."

"Whatever. You wanted the truth. Ain't my fault you don't like it," he was definitely annoyed with her reaction. He had just basically talked about feelings, which he never did for that matter, and she had slammed it all back at his face.

"Why do we always do this? Whenever we're not fucking each other's brains out, we just have to argue like some old married couple?" she sighed, sitting down on the couch and running a hand over her face.

"I didn't come here to argue, I came to say good-bye, you were the one who wanted to go into all that shit, I'm betting Charming stuff ain't that far on your list of other topics to discuss?" he sat down next to her, although between them there was a gap two real and one imaginable person could have easily filled out.

"Let's just stop okay? I got what I wanted to hear, you go to say your good-bye, let's just finish this thing right here and now," she just wanted him to stand up and walk out the door without looking back. That thing they were doing, it was destructive on both ends.

"It's not the good-bye I wanted. I'm not going to search you out again after this. I'm going back to Charming in the morning and even if I end up here again on club business or whatever, I'll make sure to stay clear of you. I know this thing has to end just as clearly as you do, I just want to end it in the right way," he finally told her what he needed to say.

She could feel his eyes on her as he said that. Scanning her from head to toe.

"Is that your way of asking me to take my clothes off for you one last time? Is this what I have to do, for you to let me go on with my life?" she stood up, reaching out behind her back. Deep inside Lexi knew she needed an end like that just as much as he did, but still she was not going to let him enjoy it like it was his victory. She was going to give him what he wanted, but in a way that would make him feel bad about it as well.

"If this is the only way you'll promise to stay clear of me, promise to not come crashing into my life whenever you want, then yeah, I'll do it," she unzipped her dress and let it fall around her ankles.

"Go on. Take me. Have me," she offered him her hand. "And then just leave me."

There was not a hint of joy in his eyes as he took the hand she was holding out. Letting her lead him to the bedroom, he even thought about leaving. But despite the need to bolt growing stronger inside of him, he knew he couldn't. It had to end like that, with one last night together. One last time together.

But all that in a way that left no opening for a possible replay. It just had to end on slightly bad terms.

She stopped in front of her bed, taking in the feel of his hands running over her shoulders and down to her fingertips. His mouth was on her neck and a familiar feeling reached her abdomen. He entwined their fingers and kissed his way up to her jawline.

Turning her around, her pressed his lips on hers. As he devoured her mouth, letting their tongues meet in the middle, he reached behind her back to unclasp her strapless bra. It fell to the floor beneath them and he left her lips to take care of her breasts.

He bit down on her nipple, and even as she let out a yelp in surprise, she actually liked it. With that he moved further south, dropping on his knees and pulling down her panties. A moan escaped her lips at the feel of his tongue running over her clit. He started sucking and nibbling at it and she felt her knees buckling under her. Pressing her nails into his shoulders for support, she screamed out in pure pleasure, as he made her come with his mouth.

As he got back up, she could see him wince due to the movement. He was definitely not going to be able to be on top, so she gently pushed him backwards, until his legs hit the bed.

He got on his back, and as much as he tried to hide it, she could see it in his face, even that hurt. She wanted to say that she would make him feel better, but neither one of them had said a word so far and it was better to leave it like that.

She helped him out of his jeans and teased his rock hard length with her mouth, before climbing on top of it. Closing her eyes, she lowered herself onto him. She didn't want to see his face, the finality of their 'relationship' was getting to her and she could feel her eyes starting to tear up.

His fingers were leaving bruises on her hips, while she wiggled on his dick and just as she heard his breaths starting to quicken up, his finger started rubbing her clit to make her come with him.

They came almost simultaneously and she wanted to just lie on top of him for the rest of the night, but knowing it would psychically hurt him and also mentally her, she got off of him as soon as her legs were back from the state of jello.

"I'm gonna take a shower… please be gone by the time I'm out," she quickly glanced at the man beside her, feeling the lump in her throat starting to get bigger by the second.

With a silent nod, he pulled her face closer. Running his fingers over her cheek, he locked his lips with hers and didn't let go. After what felt like more than a few minutes, she was able to get up, a single tear streaming down her face. She locked herself in the bathroom and letting the water run to cover her crying, she dropped to the floor and just let go of all those emotions curled up inside of her.

When she finally got out, he was gone. A part of her had hoped he'd still be there, another wished he'd left her a note saying all those things she knew he never would. In reality however, he was just gone. Exactly like she had asked him to.

…

_**Next morning in Charming**_

"What did you just say?" Clay demanded in a hushed voice, eyes squinted due to the morning sun.

"I… nothing, I just, forget about it," Cherry couldn't believe she'd just done that. What kind of a friend would do something like that?

"Get her in there," Clay motioned at the garage.

"No, please," Cherry begged as she was pushed through the double doors.

"Leave us," Clay told Juice, who then left without protest, closing the doors behind him.

"Start talking." There wasn't a way to miss the threat in Clay's voice.

"I really don't know anything. I just heard some of your guys talking about someone named Lexi when they were in Indian Hills," she tried to lie her way out of it. Not only had she herself stepped right into a field of quicksand, she had managed to drag Lexi in it as well.

"I wouldn't try that. Where is she now?" Clay grabbed Cherry by the throat, seeing right through her pathetic try. There was no one so stupid in his club to go around talking about that bitch, while also using her real name. Which meant that she really was there and had opened up her pretty little mouth. And that was not going to fly.

"I don't know," Cherry choked.

As Clay pressed down a bit harder, she finally croaked, "She's my roommate."

He let her free and headed for the door, "You'll stay in the clubhouse until I say otherwise." Turning to Juice, who was standing by the door, he added, "Take her phone and make sure she can't reach out."

"And then call the others," Clay ordered. "Church at noon."

* * *

Guess who's in trouble and doesn't even know about it..

Would love to hear you thoughts on it! Also I kind of loved the hate Cherry got in the previous chapter. Yet I wonder maybe she did redeemed herself in this one enough to not get what was otherwise coming for her?

And huge thank you to everyone who has ever reviewed or followed or favorited. Love you guys! You're keeping this story alive!


	24. Under the water

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

_Little side note: Thankfully I got a review asking me about Hap's membership status, whether he's a NOMAD or not. That reminded me that I think I have never exactly mentioned here that I'm not exactly following the show. I may use certain things that have happened, but all in all I'm not really following the exact timeline. That said, Happy is a full-patched Redwood Original since the start of this story. That's why he got to vote with the others in the earlier chapters._

* * *

He'd gotten on the road way earlier than originally planned. Well then again things going like that had actually been clear from the moment he saw Lexi with that asshole. There was not a chance in hell they would have had fun until sunrise after her date. And even as he did eventually get to have his 'fun' with her, it wasn't exactly in the way he had meant it to happen. He couldn't even believe a good fuck like that had managed to make him… sad.

When he finally rode into to the TM parking lot, he instantly took in the full line of bikes. It was rather weird, considering it wasn't even twelve yet.

"Hap," came in a familiar Scottish accent.

"Hey, bro, what's up?" he killed of his engine and looked at Chibs.

"Church is up, don't know why exactly, but Clay seems to be on edge because of it," Chibs rested his hand on the bike that was next to Hap's.

"Church? Now?" Happy found it bizarre.

"Aye."

"Everyone here already?" Happy asked, in his head wondering what it was all about.

"Yeah," Chibs pushed his sunglasses on top of his head, as they made their way inside, "why didn't you come back with the others, lad?"

"Needed to tie up some loose ends," Happy didn't like talking about her. She was a topic better left untouched. No need for someone to take an interest in her identity, just because they would probably think it's weird that he of all people stayed there longer just to spend time with some mysterious bitch. He was already sliding on thin ice, with even just Tig knowing too much about her.

"I hope you untied her after it as well," Chibs smirked.

Happy grunted, not knowing what to say to that. Thankfully he got out of the unwanted lime light, as Clay motioned him and Chibs in.

"So I was just reminded of a threat I thought we had already handled. A little birdy hitched a ride with mister dumbass over there," Clay got right to the chase and pointed at Juice, "and told me she had information in exchange for us letting her stay here."

"Naturally I'm a listen first, throw asses out later kind of guy, so what I found out was that that little Weston gash is feeling cozy in Indian Hills. And as you remember we already voted on her more than once, all concluding in a decision that there was no real need to hunt her down, as we had enough shit to hold over her pretty little head," Clay grinned at first, "_but_ by what I got out of that Nevada- tart who was stupid enough to come here, our Aryan-Princess has been running her mouth."

"What? What did she say?" Jax butted in.

"Well by the way the sweet butt suggested that she knows the whereabouts of a girl we might be looking for, hitting a Jackpot with the right name, I'd say plenty. If she was brave enough to tell her roommate that she's on the outs with us, then it's a fair guess she might as well told her all. And once that kind of a story-telling door is open, none of us is safe, which is why we are here right now," Clay leaned forward.

"It needs to be decided quickly. Can't have her spill any more of those stories. I'd say we take care of it, like we did with her father," Clay was scanning the table.

Happy felt like a bucket of cold water was dumped on his head. Was this really happening? He felt his fists clench in an aching need to hurt someone and yet he should have been concentrating on finding a way out of this. He couldn't vote on killing her again. He knew he couldn't and no one would understand. Hell they'd probably presume he'd be the first one to volunteer for the job.

In any other circumstance, he would.

But right at that point, he couldn't even think about someone aiming their gun at her head. Leaving her lying on the bloody floor, eyes open but no hint of a life going on behind them. No, he couldn't even bare to think about her like that.

But what was there to say or do, to keep her from that already practically set in place fate?

There would be no use in pointing at the evidence they had against her, like he'd done before. To Clay it wouldn't change a thing. That excuse was dead and gone.

Could he lie to his club, his family, and just say he'll do it, but instead help her escape- only this time somewhere far away? From the club, as well as from him?

No, he couldn't lie to his brothers like that. He'd already lied way over his limits just to protect her.

This left him with only one possible solution, one that could very easily turn to shit within minutes. For her, as well as for him. But time was running out, as the others argued about the need to kill her, which meant he needed to make his decision and he needed to make it right away, before it was too late.

However opening his mouth felt like jumping head first into a hole without a solid bottom. He closed it up, trying to push out his feelings instead. If he'd just let it slide, he'd eventually forget about her. He would go back to his emotionless state of mind, the one that had managed to force him through life without looking back, without feeling remorse.

However as soon as Happy decided he was going to remain silent, her face popped into his mind. The look in her eyes as they laid next to each other. Her eyes appearing to be made of glass, as the water started to search its way out of them.

They were always battling like enemies, but at this time and space, he just couldn't pick the opposing team, cause even as he could still see himself stand against her when needed, he couldn't see himself doing that alongside with his brothers. Not like that.

Happy already knew he would probably regret saying it, but in the end also knew he would regret even more if he didn't even try.

"She won't be a problem," Happy said out, surprising even himself with the sudden certainty in his voice. All eyes were instantly on him, waiting for a clarification.

"I should have told you before, but wanted to wait until I got back here, do to it right," he chose his words very carefully. "I knew she was there. I was with her… I am with her."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Clay demanded.

"She won't rat, I'll make sure of it, and about that bitch who got here before me, she knows shit. Just overheard us talking about how you guys might react, Lexi might have also mentioned she was hiding from the club, but nothing else, but a mistake like that will never happen again," he looked around in the room.

The air was thick with tension. Bobby was literally eyeing him with an open mouth and Tig simply looked like he had finally managed to solve a crossword he had already given up on.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Clay glowered.

"That's the truth," he held Clay's gaze.

"So what I'm hearing is that Killer got himself an Old Lady?" Tig smirked, obviously enjoying himself.

He thought about not answering, as that was not what he had meant. Not at all. But with the looks that came from Clay and Jax, he didn't see another way out of it.

"I guess," he grunted.

Yeah, he had been right. He already regretted his words.

"Since when has this been going on? Ah, never mind, just get her down here then, I wanna talk to her personally. Hell, I still can't wrap my head around, but then again I can't see why you would protect her if it wasn't true. Anyhow this ain't over until I get a good sense of what she's all about, Old Lady or not," the threat in Clay's voice was crystal clear.

Silently he nodded. How in the hell was he going to get her down here. He hadn't thought that far, not at all. He also forgot to think about what his words were implying to.. An Old Lady? That sounded like bullshit even to his own ears. No wonder no-one around the table seemed to be able to just go with it. Besides Tig maybe..

And to top it all off, he had still lied to them. He had no idea what Lexi had told that bitch, or what he was going to have to do to make that Nevada gash play along with all that nonsense he had just mixed together. Cause it wasn't only Lexi's head on the line anymore, it was both of theirs.

The truth wasn't going to set either of them free.

It was too busy with digging their graves.

* * *

I wonder if you saw this coming..

To give out a little spoiler... someone's going to be royally pissed off by the turn of events.

As always I'm really thankful to every reader! And to all of you who have reviewed on those last few chapters, I've really been amazed with your responses! Thank you so much, that's such a huge part of my motivation. Also you guys are funny as hell.


	25. Will the guns come out?

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

"Tig, go with him," Clay didn't remove his eyes from Happy. The look he gave him was accompanied with a shadow of doubt. He wasn't buying it. Clay was following his own instincts and those for sure were screaming that there was something wrong with his sudden declaration of… ownership?

"Gladly," Tig grinned, looking rather smug.

As the meeting closed, Happy found himself striding toward a bottle of Scotch. Not that he needed a drunken mind to complicate the day even more, but he simply couldn't wrap his head around to what he was going to do next, which meant he needed something to ease his nerves.

"You got a bitch seat ready?" Tig squeezed his shoulder. Happy wanted to push the hand away, but it was not the time to lift off. Just as must as he knew Tig saw it all as a big challenge, he also knew he needed to remain calm and not out of character- that much his mind was sure of. He pressed his lips together into a hard line and looked at the half-empty glass in his hands.

He also knew there was someone he needed to see before heading out again.

"We should get going. Meet me out front, I'll go take a piss," Happy ignored his questioning look and made his way past him.

Instead of going to the bathroom, he got out through the backdoor. He wasn't sure where that bitch was held, but seeing the prospect inside the garage, leaning against the door that lead to a little supply room, he was more than sure he was already on a right track.

"Chibs is looking for you," Happy said as casually as he could, closing up to him.

"Oh, but Juice told me to keep an eye on…" Half-Sack trailed off, pointing at the door behind him.

"Go," Happy frowned at him impatiently, "I'll stay."

"Okay, man," he half-ran past him.

Happy had just seen Chibs ride out, when he was crossing the lot to get to garage, so it was bound to take the prospect some time to realize Chibs wasn't even anywhere near, leaving that same time for him to get his point across with the gash behind the closed door.

Throwing a quick look over his shoulder, he entered the dimly lit room.

The bitch was sitting on a table, but a soon as she noticed him, got up. Oh how easy it would have been to just kill her off- that way there wouldn't even be a possibility of her opening that big mouth of hers again.

The idea travelling in his head must have been clear to her too.

"Please don't hurt me," she begged, taking a step back, her hands searching for something to hold onto.

"I will, if you won't shut the fuck up," Happy stepped forward, until she was trapped between the wall and him.

"I don't know anything else, I swear!" she continued her whining.

"You listen to me real close now, you stupid cunt," he pressed her right cheek against the wall and bent down to her left ear, his voice low and bleak, "you don't know anything else, besides what you've already told, and Lexi didn't tell you shit, you just overheard us talking, got that?"

Releasing her face, he took a small step back, to see her eyes, "Am I clear?"

She nodded, a horrified look on her make-up smudged face.

"Cause otherwise Clay will kill her," he glared at her, "and I will personally kill you."

"I won't say a word, I promise," she nodded, silent tears falling down her face.

"You better not.. and nothing about me talking to you either," he threatened, turning his back to her and walking out, "or I will burn you alive."

Not a minute after he got out, Half-Sack re-appeared. "I couldn't find him," he said, seemingly out of breath.

With a grim shrug, Happy took off. Now that the _easier_ part of the day was over, he needed to get back to Indian Hills as quickly as possible- just to collect a certain someone, who definitely wasn't going to shrink under his gaze and agree to whatever he wanted her to agree with.

Tig was already by the bikes, when Happy got there.

"Hey maybe we should come back through Vegas, I would make one hell of a best man, you know," he chuckled at his sudden realization, or maybe at the face his brilliant idea brought up on Hap.

Happy simply glared at him to shut up.

How the hell was he even in that mess. Shit! To top it all off, he couldn't even see a way out it, and that was making him want to run off a hill, head first. None of this was even remotely funny.

…

Half-Sack had been sitting outside the room Cherry was held in for more than a few hours already. He was dying to just open the door, talk to her. After all she had apparently come here for him. But no matter how much he wanted to see her, he couldn't, just as he couldn't let anyone else enter either- it had been a very strict order.

He sat down against the wall and closed his eyes, listening to the drilling sounds coming from behind the wall. The noises were so loud that he didn't even hear a pair of high-heel boots coming to a stop in front of him.

"Who's that bitch?" Gemma demanded, looking down at him.

"No-one, just a Tribe hang-around," he got up, patting the dust of his jeans.

"And why is she in there?" Gemma pointed at the door he was guarding.

"Just.. I.. well.." he stammered, unable to find a good explanation.

"Just what? Spit it out! I could literally hear your heart skip a beat when she got out of that truck in the morning," Gemma took a step closer, now pointing her ringed finger right at him.

She squinted her eyes, reading the sad expression on Half-Sack's face.

"Why was Clay so mad?" she continued her questioning.

"She told him something… it was a club thing, you don't have to worry about it, Gemma" he forced on a smile, hoping that would make her leave him be.

"No, it was before that, he was angry the minute he laid his eyes on her, what happened in Indian Hills? He hit her, didn't he?" Gemma searched for the answers in his eyes.

He didn't need to tell anything else, his sad apologetic look was all she needed, to fill the gaps. She already knew, she just needed him to affirm… and he did.

"That stupid…" she stormed past him, yanking open the door in her way.

"Gemma," Half-Sack got in right after her.

His eyes locked with Cherry's and just as she was just about to open her mouth, a broomstick landed on her face.

"My nose," she cried out, looking at the pool of blood in her hands, "why did you do that? I've done exactly the way you guys have told me."

"Take her to the ER," Gemma turned to look at Half-Sack.

"I'm not supposed to let her leave," he mumbled, unable to take his eyes off of the bloody-faced girl in front of him.

"That's why you're escorting her. Get her patched up and then back here."

Half-Sack nodded. It wasn't like he could have just left her there, down on the floor, practically swimming in her own blood.

"Take this," he got Cherry a rag to keep the blood from spilling everywhere.

"Take her out through the office, that way others won't see you guys leaving," Gemma said before going in the opposite way.

"Sorry bout that," Half-Sack said as they got to the hospital.

"Who was she?" Cherry asked.

"Clay's Old Lady."

"Just great," Cherry said, voice full of irony.

Her nose was pretty much broken in half and even as the doctor managed to put it back in one straight line, it was bound to be an ugly, colorful and altogether eye-catching sight for weeks to come.

She looked around in the doctor's office she was sitting in, while waiting for the paperwork to be done. Her eyes travelled from the computer to the pretty picture frame, to the phone, to the doctor himself… and then back to the phone. That there was her one and only chance to reach out, which meant she needed to be quick and clever.

"Would you mind?" she hesitantly turned to Half-Sack. "Ah, never mind actually."

"What is it?" he asked softly, lifting his eyes to meet hers.

"It just that… Well I haven't really eaten anything since like yesterday afternoon… I thought maybe you could grab me something from the vending machine, besides it's not like I could jump out the 5th floor window while you're in the hallway… but I do understand if you can't let me out of your sight even for a second," she gave him a wry and understanding smile.

The doctor looked at them for a second, raising his eyebrow at their weird conversation.

Half-Sack must have noticed that too, as he gave her a meaningful look before standing up. "I'll be right back."

As soon as the door closed, she turned to the doctor.

"Is it possible for me to get two copies? From the x-rays and all? I didn't want my overprotective boyfriend here to hear that, but I kind of need an extra copy of all that for a work place he doesn't really approve of," she put on her best good-girl face.

"Yeah sure," he gave her a weird look, but still got up to leave the room.

As soon as Cherry was all alone, she hurried to the phone. Dialing their home number, she prayed for Lexi to pick up.

"Pick up," she mumbled, wrapping the phone cord around her shaking fingers.

"Hello?" a familiar voice answered.

"Lex, it's me, Cherry," she kept her eyes on the doorknob.

"Was about time you called, so how did it go with the love of your life?"

"Listen to me, I don't have much time to explain. I'm in Charming. SAMCROW knows where you are. I'm so sorry, but I think you're in danger."

"What? What are you talking about? How would they know?"

"I told Clay. I'm sorry it slipped out. You need to hide."

"How could it slip out? Fuck. What did you do?!"

"I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking and it was the only thing I could say to make him listen to me," Cherry knew how bad it sounded.

"You bitch? You pointedly sold me out?" Lexi yelled at her.

"I'm sorry. Please forgive me! As soon as I realized what I did, I tried to lie, but he didn't buy any of it. I know you hate me now, but please know that I tried to take it back. I made a mistake, I'm sorry."

"You're sorry? You stupid whore. Better keep your eyes on your back, cause if I ever see your face again, you'll be SORRY you ever knew me."

"Please, Lexi," Cherry begged, but Lexi had already ended the call.

As much as Cherry knew she was the sole person to blame for the shit-storm about to rain down on both of them, she had least managed to give her a chance to get one step ahead of it all.

…

Lexi also knew one thing- this time she was prepared. Even as she had so far been so sure that if a day like that would come, she'd just let it- figuring that there was no point in fighting, when she had already lost it all- she couldn't shake off the sadly all too familiar survival-adrenalin that had kicked in the minute Cherry dropped the big SOA-bomb on her.

Fighting with her shaking hands, she pulled out her pre-packed suitcase.

However it didn't only hold her belongings, it was also a home to her very much loaded 38''. Guess a part of her had always known she'd never just back down.

* * *

Thank you for reading and thank you for supporting this story! Lots of love to you all!

Now about this chapter- I know it's a cliffhanger … and yes, I hate those too. :D

BUT I'm already working on the next one, so it won't take that long.

And about Cherry, I couldn't help but let her meddle some more. Well at least this time she had good intentions... however was it a good move? Will see.


	26. If only you dug a little deeper

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

Lexi wasn't going to wait for the killing squad, she was going to run. However if it did go the other way, with them arriving sooner than she expected, she was at least psychically ready to stand for herself… well her gun was. Taking a quick look around the apartment, she gathered the remaining items into her already half-packed suitcase. Thankfully she had saved some cash for an emergency like this, just enough to get a ticket somewhere far away and then start that life-shit all over again- this time definitely in a town without a single MC in sight. It had already been a next level of stupidity to step into the same bucket of hellhole twice.

She was just about to take off, when an alarming noise made her run to the window.

"Oh no-no. FUCK!" she muttered through gritted teeth. She couldn't really tell from that far away, who exactly was coming up for a visit, but there was definitely more than one bike heading in her direction, and it didn't take a genius to know it was SAMCROW.

Making sure her gun's safety was off, she paced to her suitcase. Looking at it, she realized it was only going to slow her down. Quickly she flipped open the top part and pulled out her cash and phone. Phone- could they trace her through it? Probably.

Lexi dropped it and pocketed the money. This left her with empty hands. She was going crazy. Where had she put her gun? It wasn't on the ground, neither was it on the table. Where fuck was it? That was the one thing she couldn't leave without.

Going through her suitcase again, she finally found it- she'd put it into the place her cell and cash had previously been.

All of a sudden it was quiet, which could have only meant one thing.

They were already on their way up.

She hurried to the kitchen- it offered the best view to the front door. Shaking like a leaf, she peeked outside. It was Tig, he was casually leaning over his bike. There was another Harley next to his, with its owner nowhere in sight.

To them she must have been an easy job- they didn't even bother with coming in together. Great. That meant they were underestimating her. Maybe they weren't even aware of the fact that she knew they were coming for her. She might have even had a chance here. A small one, but still.

There was a silent knock on her door. Yeah, definitely she was going to go and open the door to whoever it was. Maybe even offer that person coffee and cake? Yeah right.

After a few more knocks on the door it got quiet. She was literally holding her breath, while her heart was working overtime, wishing they'd just go away, to maybe look for her at work or the clubhouse. After all they didn't have a single reason to think that she was hiding from them in there. Unless of course Cherry had blabbed again and considering everything, it was not that unlikely.

And she probably had, cause the next thing she could hear was her door getting kicked open.

In fear and trembling, she raised her 38''. "_This is it."_

"Lexi?" Happy's raspy voice shouted out.

Really? They sent him? Did he volunteer or something? She didn't exactly have time, or a clear mind for that matter, to process feelings, but simply knowing it was him… it hit her heart like a wrecking ball.

"Lex… whooah," he stopped in the hallway, looking right at her before his eyes moved to the barrel aimed at his heart.

"Put it down," he hissed, not showing any signs of fear.

"I swear to God, if you take a step closer, I will shoot you," she warned.

"What the fuck are you doing? Just give it to me," Happy expectantly held out his hand. Like she was actually going to give him the only thing that kept her alive at that point.

"No," she spat out, hating the fact that she couldn't keep her voice from trembling.

"I ain't kidding, put it down. Now!" Happy dropped his hand, clearly furious.

"I ain't kidding either. If I see you reach for something, I will fucking shoot you without a doubt."

"Jesus Christ," his hand slid over his head and he turned around, "how the hell did you find out? I know, I didn't think it through, but you ain't got a choice here, so put that gun away and lets go."

"I got a warning-call. And if you really think I'm going to walk out, hands held high, so you could kill me in some dark alley, then I think I really should shoot you just for being such an idiot."

"Kill you?" he turned back around. "If I fucking wanted to kill you… you'd be dead."

"Yeah right, why you here then? Missed me?" she kept on aiming at him.

"To take you back to Charming. I handled the Clay-situation. Who'd you get the call from anyways?" he growled while eyeing her questioningly.

"None of your business and what do you mean you handled the situation. I'm still alive, can't you tell?" she was getting confused.

"No-one is going to kill you. You're under my protection now. I told them," he was looking down on the floor, avoiding her gaze.

"I don't understand, I got a call that basically told me to run for my life."

"I don't know who has been telling you that shit, but it ain't the deal. Your fucking idiot of a roommate told Clay that she knows where you are, Clay assumed from there that you've been talking… but it doesn't matter, I cleared it all out. So just trust me and let's get going. Put that gun down."

"You can't just tell me to trust you, why would I believe in anything you say. It's not making any sense."

After mumbling something that ended with 'fricking women', he took a step closer.

"Don't!" she shook her head.

"Fine," he stopped moving, "I told them that Cherry overheard us talking and that you haven't said shit to anyone, other than me. Also that the bitch knew nothing, as she didn't hear anything specific… " Happy looked down again, "then I told them you're with me and they won't have to worry about you anymore, so now you just need to have a talk with Clay and it's all good."

"With you?" she raised an eyebrow. "What does that even mean?"

"It means you're mine and I'm responsible. Now get your stuff and let's go, I've explained enough."

"Yours? Like an Old Lady?" She had heard enough in the Devil's Tribe clubhouse to know exactly what that meant.

"Yeah, I guess. You just have to play the part, cause it's the only thing keeping you safe now," there was something weird in the way he looked at her. He almost seemed to be afraid, or embarrassed.

"Are you fucking kidding me? You asshole!" she finally dropped the gun to the kitchen counter. There were countless thoughts passing through her and she couldn't even begin to understand a single one of them. She felt trapped like a cage animal and exactly because of that she couldn't even look him in the eyes.

"So let me get this straight, instead of simply letting me know that shit's about to hit the fan and by that giving me an opportunity to drop off the map, you fricking declared me yours like some dog you found behind the dumpster?" she kept her eyes on the gun.

"Oh and to top it all off, you now expect me to follow you back to Charming, the one place in the whole world you know I will never feel safe," she could feel her blood starting to boil. "And even that's not all. I'm now also forced into a fake relationship that will kill of every chance of a normal life, cause surely if I would ever blow the cover, by for example falling in love with someone, I'm dead. Am I right?"

He hadn't thought of it like that at all. Neither had he expected that kind of a reaction. After all he had, against all odds, tried to help her, to keep her alive. And yet she didn't see any of it.

"Take it. I'd rather you kill me now, than force me into a lifetime of torture," she pushed the gun in his direction.

"It's done," he said in a low voice.

Yeah it was done, without her having any say in it.

"You know what?" Lexi grabbed the first thing in her reach- a banana.

"I…" she threw it at him.

"fucking…" she picked up an apple, but he managed to duck just before it hit his head.

"hate you!" Lexi grabbed a handful from the bowl that held a mixture of raisins and cereal and launched it at him.

"Are you done?" he growled, wiping off the things that had managed to stick to his clothes. "Cause if I see you throw another thing in my way, I'll spank your ass like the last time, and it won't stop there."

With what sounded like a collection of various ways to express anger, she whirred past him.

"Just take whatever fits your pockets. I'll send prospects to get the rest later," Happy said, moving to stand in front of her front door. Just in case she decided to do something stupid again.

"You're going to be so sorry for doing this to me," she crossed her arms, coming to stand in front of him.

With a grunt he opened the door.

Occasionally checking, whether she was still following him, they made their way out.

"You have a collar ready for me, in case I get lost when you take me out for a morning walk?" Lexi asked behind him, just before they got to where Tig was standing.

"What did you guys do for so long? You can express your _love _when we get back home, or when I can see it as well," Tig commented, emphasizing the word 'love'.

As neither of them answered a thing, he took a closer look at the crumpy couple. That's when his eyes stopped on Hap's shoulder.

"Is that?" he raised his eyebrow, pointing at the cereal flakes on top of his kutte. "Kinky," he nodded approvingly, as Happy worked on getting the remains of their little food-war off of him.

* * *

Thank you for reading!

Lexi is quite raging at the moment, so I'm actually even a bit sorry for Hap... and Cherry, if she's unlucky enough to face her.

Personally I'm quite excited for her return to Charming, so I hope to get the next chapter out soon!

Would love to hear your thoughts on the matter as well! :)


	27. Let the games begin

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

"Get on," Happy's raspy voice said it in a way that made her want to literally bark in response. There never was a 'please would you' involved when it came to requests made by the moody biker. Where did he even take the right to be pissed off? He wasn't the one forced into a life in shackles, she was.

Tig watched their passive aggressive communication in silence. He knew something was off. He'd actually known it from the start. No way had Happy simply decided to take himself an Old Lady- especially her. But still he hadn't shared his doubts out loud. Mainly cause it was one hell of an entertainment to watch Hap struggle with whatever he was trying to achieve. In addition, unlike Clay, he also couldn't see a real threat in Lexi. Yeah, she knew stuff, but still the circumstances hadn't changed. She was in over her head. There were no moves for her to make that would have left her out of the list people getting burned once the truth was truly out. Clay was simply seeing demons where there actually weren't any, or if there were some, they were tiny and harmless.

Still he was going to confront Happy about it. Not right away, but at one point. Hap would not have done something like that just on a whim. There must have been a good reason. Trying to figure it out all by himself, Tig's eyes darted between the scowling duo.

He choked on a laugh, when he saw Lexi pointedly step on Hap's toes while trying to climb behind him. Happy growled, but let it slide. Yup, it was definitely going to be fun watching those two.

The road was long and tiresome. Especially since just a few short hours prior they had been on a one just as long, which is also why they made a quick stop at the gas station. "So, Fire-Dragon, weren't you blonde before?" Tig called out, his eyes following Lexi as she strode around Hap's bike to straighten her legs. With Happy still inside to pay, it was a perfect opening to fish for truth.

"Yeah," she gave him a one-worded answer.

"I figured so. That's why I didn't recognize you before. I bet you were real glad that Happy did though," he narrowed his eyes mockingly, waiting for her answer.

"Oh yeah. Happy as hell," she nodded vigorously, not bothering with a smile.

She couldn't drop her anger. It was floating over her like a thunder cloud- just searching for a right place to jab the lightning bolt.

Silently Lexi scanned her surroundings. She had no idea how far away from Charming they were. But whatever the actual distance was, it was already making her anxious. What was she going to tell Clay? Should she lie like Happy had insisted or simply come out with the truth and watch the whole world burn?

And even if she went along with Happy's story, what exactly would happen after that? Would she really have to move back to Charming? If so, then where exactly? To Happy's place? How could that even work? Also what about Ben? She actually liked him… he was nice… unlike some other people in her fucked up life.

In addition to everything else, she knew well that there would always be that constant threat if she really stayed in Charming. She would never be able to walk around freely in that town, without feeling a need to look over her shoulder at any turn for Clay or anyone else having a problem with her and her knowledge on things.

Like for example Tig. Simply basing on the suspicious look in his eyes… it was clear that he didn't really buy their 'relationship' story. However while peeking at him from the corner of her eye, she also remembered one other thing related to him- she hadn't thanked him. He'd saved her from that rapist bastard and she had yet to express her gratitude.

"I never got to thank you… for saving me that night," she said quietly, watching Happy walk back to them.

"No worries, doll. You already thanked me with that free show," he grinned. Instantly making her regret ever mentioning it. Fighting her urge to snap back at the asshole, she put on the helmet while turning her back to him.

The rest of the way was rather uneventful. Until they were past the city limits and she had a sudden urge to throw up all over Hap's back. It felt like she was riding to her execution. Well at least to a trial that decided the matter of whether she would see another day or not.

As they finally pulled into the parking lot and got off of his bike, she instantly felt more than one pair of eyes following her every step.

Although she couldn't tell whether it was for the show or for actual encouragement, she was in fact even a bit relieved feeling Happy's hand on her lower back as they were walking in. The dominant part of her however made her want to slap that hand back to where it came from. How dared he touch her?

"Remember the story?" Happy asked in a hushed voice.

She rolled her eyes. At least a tiny part of her faith was back in her hands again- one that decided whether her life was going to get fucked up royally or a tiny bit less. That alone managed to make the devil inside her cheer- for it was Hap's time to endure the feel of control slipping through the fingers.

Not even giving him a nod, she made a quick step forward, losing his hand from her back in the process.

"Let's talk in there," Clay's gaze matched hers. He was looking annoyed and doubtful.

Silently she followed the president to the backroom.

With Clay sitting down, the table was almost full, leaving only one seat open. She stopped in her tracks and waited. The movement beside her made Lexi snap her head in a flash. Happy looked her deep in the eyes for a tiny second, before walking up to the empty seat and slumping down on it. It probably belonged to him.

Asshole. Of course he was joining the jury, leaving her there to stand for herself all alone.

"So you've been talking," Clay said in a way that made her wonder whether it was a question or a statement. She eyed him for a fleeting moment, debating on what to say. By the way that he managed to look as calm as ever, inspecting her trough the cloud of smoke he had just created, she decided to reply in the same peaceful manner.

"I haven't," she shook her head.

"Not even with Hap?"

"Yeah we've been talking, although not exactly about the things I presume you are hinting at."

"Good," he said it with a smile, but it was clear it was a fake one.

Clay's eyes moved back and forth between her and Hap. "You got your crow already?"

"A crow?" Lexi raised an eyebrow.

"Ink, Happy's ink. You being his Old Lady and all, I assumed you've at least talked about it," he narrowed his eyes at her.

"We haven't. We were keeping this low-key… until now," she couldn't tell the exact moment she'd decided to go along with the crazy story of her and Hap as a MC version of newlyweds, but carrying out the lie had come easier than she had expected. That shit was practically rolling off her lips.

"I see. Still I'm hoping to see it. Soon." From the hint in his words, it was clear, he was lying his ass off as well. He knew it was bullshit, or at least party. Or maybe he simply didn't care about her being an Old Lady. To him she was still a threat and by the looks of it he was just going to play along with them until he came up with an effective way to get rid of her once and for all.

She let her eyes fall on Happy. She had hoped he would give her a sign, absolutely anything to hint at what she was supposed to say to that ink-talk. Instead however, he was staring at the table in front of him, not even meeting her gaze- guess he was starting to regret his decision to let it go this far. He didn't want an Old Lady, she knew it without him having to say it out loud, and just about now the realization of them two really going down that fucked up road must have finally started sinking in to him too. Good. It was good to see _him_ feel like a cage animal for a change.

Yet on the other hand however, for some unknown reason, his behavior annoyed her. Or rather the fear of what he would do, now that he realized he was metaphorically handcuffed to her, did. After all it was is sole doing that had stirred up this mess. To hell if he was pulling out of it in the last minute, just because it got too real for him to handle.

Beside all those mixed feelings however, it did give her a sick joy, seeing him tense up at the thing she was going to say next, cause after all she had promised to make him sorry for doing that to her. "Oh yes you will," she looked Clay dead in the eyes.

Then again it was a really stupid response on her part. No way was she going to be wearing his tat… like some branded animal. The mere fought of it made her shudder. It was one thing to pretend to be his, a whole another to actually have something permanent marking her skin, just to prove it was true.

"That's great. I think we're good for now," Clay smiled at her. The only thing she could pick out from that sentence was the ending- "for now".

She nodded, turning around to leave the room. "I'm expecting to see you at tonight's party. After all you're part of our little family now. We should all get to know you."

She gulped down hard, glancing back over her shoulder at the table full of murderous looking men. That was definitely not a family she wanted to belong to. She already had one, more or less like that, and it hadn't turned out that well. Rather the opposite actually.

…

"We good?" Happy asked, his eyes still glued to the ashtray in front of him, right after Lexi had left the room.

"Yeah," Clay said. Happy hadn't missed the 'for now' part before either. But he wasn't going to point that out.

"You two are so sweet, I wanna eat you both… well maybe only her," Tig grinned at him from the opposite end of the table, lightning the mood.

"You can eat my fists," Happy growled back at him.

"Okay, enough. Let's talk business," Clay shifted in his seat.

As soon as church was over, Happy rushed out to search for Lexi. He found her sitting by the boxing ring. She raised her head to look at him under her lashes, as he made his way over.

"What now?" she demanded.

"Come," he jerked his head.

"Woof," she barked, rising to her feet at his command.

He squinted his eyes at her, but didn't say a thing.

They rode through the town, until they stopped in front of his place. Lexi had been there before, but still she looked kind of surprised.

"You're staying here with me," he answered her unasked question, while opening up the front door.

"Don't you have a doghouse ready for me?" she asked in her most sardonic voice.

"Can be arranged," he said with a shrug.

"Fuck you," she muttered quietly, following him in.

"That can be arranged too," he said, casting a daring look over his shoulder.

"You wanna get ready? We should head back soon," he said after a moment of silence.

"Get ready how? You have a wardrobe waiting for me here or something? Cause as far as I remember, you made me leave with empty hands."

"You can take a shower if you want, the clothing will work," he waved at her jeans and jacket combo. He wasn't going to say that out loud, but he was glad she wasn't going to be able to show off her body in some skanky dress. He wasn't jealous, he just simply wanted to avoid inappropriate ideas other's might get.

She grunted something in response, before disappearing to the bathroom.

Coming out some while later, he couldn't help but notice she'd unbuttoned her jacket. Underneath it she was wearing a white lacy thing. It was so see-through that he could perfectly see the shape of her bra-covered boobs.

"Button up. Ain't no-one there that needs to see those," he looked up at her.

"Let's just go, _honey_, don't want to be late to meeting your family," she said with a smirk that stretched out from one ear to the other.

The party was already in a full swing, when they finally got there. He fought with his urge to button up her jacket himself, but knew it would only make a scene. Besides everyone there already knew she was with him. Whether they actually believed it or not, he doubted anyone there had the balls big enough to push up on her in front of him.

Still the fact that she was wearing something like that annoyed him. More than he was ready to admit.

The other thing that annoyed him was the fact that he didn't know how to act. He'd never been to one of those parties _with_ someone. He also knew Clay was keeping an eye on them at all times and probably everyone else too. All the crow eaters where scanning Lexi from head to toe and by the uncomfortable look on her face, he knew she saw that too.

"Wanna drink?" he asked her.

"I guess," she said in a grumpy tone.

"Okay, go sit down there, I'll bring you something," he motioned at a couch.

"Woof," she said in a voice only he could hear.

"Stop that," he glared at her.

"Stop treating me like your fucking lapdog," Lexi glared back at him.

"Don't make a scene," he warned her, before walking to the bar.

Looking back at her over his shoulder, he could see her sit down with a puzzling look on her face as her eyes travelled through the room.

He picked up two bottles of beer and moved to sit down next to her. He couldn't exactly get drunk and fuck the crows- not with Lexi there. So what else was there to do, than to just drink together with her. Still he knew he had to at least make it look like he was going to fuck her at the end of the night as well.

She was however making that last part difficult, especially with trying to sit as far away from him as possible.

"The fuck you're doing?" he demanded, as he kicked up her legs between them.

"What does it look like? I'm sitting."

"You know they're watching us… "

"So? Are they expecting me to fuck you in front of them or something?"

"They're expecting us to act normal," he tried to not raise his voice. "This," he pointed at her legs stretched out between them, "isn't."

"Oh too bad."

As he was not getting anywhere with simply talking to her, he reached out and pulled her onto his lap.

"Hey!" Lexi protested, as he tugged at her to make her straddle him.

"Just shut up and play along," he pulled her closer to him.

"I don't want to," she tried to push him away.

His hands moved from her back to her ass. He had missed touching her like that and even with her fighting him on the matter, he could see it in her face, it brought up good memories for her as well.

"Kiss me," he said in a voice that was low even for him.

"Go kiss yourself!"

"Just do it, ain't like it would be the first time."

She snarled at him, before bending down and pressing her lips on his for a millisecond.

He grabbed the back of her head just as she was about to pull away. "Like you mean it," he instructed against her lips.

She let him capture her lips in a rough, yet passionate manner. He pulled her even closer, sure of the fact that she could very well feel the growing in his pants.

Just as he won the battle of lips and managed to get his tongue past hers , a set of teeth bit down hard. He instinctively pulled his head back, pretty sure that she had managed to draw blood.

"In case you're wondering, then yeah, I totally meant that," she said with a gloating smile, pushing herself up from his lap.

"Bad fucking move," he growled, standing up as well.

With ease he threw her over his shoulder and started heading towards the dorm rooms.

* * *

As always I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing.

As you could see I was truly excited, which is why it is a bit longer chapter. Also I've been updating two days in a row now- quite proud of that. :D

So what do you think Happy is planning? Pleasure or punishment? Or is there a third option?

I also have this little **one-shot of Cherry and Tig** out now- search for Sweet like cherry pie, if you're interested. :)


	28. Would you fight for my love?

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

She knew well enough not to make a scene as he was carrying her towards the bedrooms, but that didn't mean she was okay with the way things were heading. Quite the opposite actually.

He put her down as soon as they reached the hallway. Still he didn't let her out of his hold. Instead he started yanking her forward.

"Hell no," Lexi hissed at him.

"Go," he jerked his head.

She was about to snap back at him, but the sound of someone coming up behind them made them both turn around.

Tig came to a halt right next to them, leaning casually against the wall with his arms crossed and a dirty grin illuminating his face.

"What?" Happy growled in his direction.

"It looked like you could use help taming that wildcat," he winked at Lexi.

The glares Tig got from both of them however made him quickly change his mind. Apparently they were not in the mood for his jokes.

"We're good," Happy said in a voice that Tig recognized as a warning.

By the look that Happy gave him, Tig couldn't really tell whether Hap even understood that he was actually just kidding. The guy looked like he was literally pissed at him for even suggesting something like that. They'd shared women before and Hap had never before shown real signs of possession towards whoever he was at that point doing.

"Okay then, have fun kids, take pictures!" he grinned, trying to lighten the mood and took a quick left to one of the dorm rooms. After all he did need to take a leak before returning back to the party area..

…

"You're crazy if you think I'm doing anything with you," Lexi muttered as soon as the door closed behind them.

"Don't forget who you're dealing with and NEVER pull that biting shit in front of them again," he pinned her against the door, his dark eyes fixated at hers.

As she was busy with raging and looking for a good come-back, he pressed closer and forced a sloppy kiss on her.

"I ain't your whore." It took some serious strength, but she finally managed to push him away. "Even if everyone else here thinks I am, you should fricking know better."

She was furious at him, but then again couldn't also really handle the hunger she had for him. Those two sides colliding were simply driving her insane.

And that meant that she needed to get away from him… before a certain traitorous side of her brain won.

"I don't want to be here and I sure as hell don't want to pretendto want to be here with _you._ I didn't ask for any of this shit."

She was still captured between him and the door. He glowered at her in silence for a good long minute, before his fist smashing against the door made her jump in surprise.

"I didn't either," he growled, pushing her away from the door and storming out.

She stood there in total stillness, watching the door swing shut behind him.

"Now what?" she walked to the bed and sat down. Was she free to go? Then again she doubted if she was ever going to be free to really leave… but was she at least allowed to go 'home'? Even in her thoughts she couldn't really think of Hap's place as a home. It felt too much like a prison. Just like it had felt in the beginning, when SAMCROW had thought it was a good idea to kidnap her and assign Happy as her personal prison guard.

Still right at that moment in time it was a way better place to be than the clubhouse, cause in his home she didn't have the pressure to act according to whatever deal she had agreed on. The simple thought of that deal was still feeding her fury. If only Happy had warned her, instead of creating this fucked up situation, she could have already been far-far away.

However as much as she wanted to get out of that hellhole of a clubhouse, she couldn't make the move towards that goal all by herself. Mainly cause it involved her first having to go through the area full of cautious eyes and loaded guns.

It took her a good half an hour to collect herself enough to take a walk on the wild side again. She hurried past the crowd gathered around the pool table and stopped by the bar. She couldn't exactly just walk out the gates without it being suspicious, so she let her gaze roam over the room to spot Hap. As much as it bothered her, he was her only way out of there.

But Happy was nowhere in sight and there was only one direction in which her mind was heading- Happy must have been pissed enough to actually grab himself some slut, even as she was personally there and there was a certain front they were both supposed to hold up. She was again starting to boil with anger. How could he do that to her? Put her life in risk just because she wouldn't fuck him? Maybe there was a bit of jealousy also involved into the mix, but she didn't stop on that idea for too long.

Instead she made her way to a prospect patch wearing guy. He looked harmless enough to talk to.

"Hey, have you seen Happy?" Lexi gave her a smile that probably didn't reach her eyes.

"Eeh, yeah I think he's somewhere outside," he said after taking a second to think about her question.

"Thanks," she strode towards the door in search of her 'Old Man'.

The 'somewhere outside' didn't exactly help her, as she was confused about which way to go. A part of her was more than sure that he was somewhere hidden in the darkness, getting a head from some bitch. Another half on the other hand was afraid that he was doing the same thing, but in public. Figuring it was better to check out the worst possibility first, she followed the sounds coming from around the corner.

She had been right.

He wasn't hiding in the shadows. He was more like under the projector and not alone.

However he wasn't getting a blowjob, he was simply beating the shit out of someone.

"Kick his ass," Clay shouted towards the ring. Although she couldn't tell whether it was meant for Hap or for the other guy. A guy she didn't know the name of. It could have been someone from another charter.. Still it was one hell of a fight.

She took a few steps closer, even though her head was screaming at her to just stay away, look away. She knew Hap was good at things like that, but still the other guy seemed to know what he was doing as well.

She could have sworn she heard something break when the other dude's fist made contact with Happy's ribs. Was he crazy? He had just been stabbed and now he was in the ring, most likely at his own willingness.

Lexi couldn't tear her eyes away though. Seeing hurt in his face made her wince. Why wasn't anybody breaking that shit up? Another blow landed on his face and she couldn't take it anymore. If no-one else was going to do a thing, she was. She might have had a fiery anger towards Hap, but still she couldn't idly stand by watching someone beat him into a pulp.

Making her way through the crowd, Hap's eyes found hers. She stopped. She couldn't tell what, but something in his gaze immobilized her in an instant.

From then on the fight took a quick turn. Happy was going at it hard and the other guy looked like he was going to get a ride home with the ambulance instead of his Harley.

That's when someone finally decided to end that stupidity. She didn't even realize that before, but she had been holding her breath the whole time. As soon as Hap and the other one had hugged it out, like they hadn't just been throwing punches at each other's faces, he made his way over to her.

Deep inside she wanted to ask him if he was okay. She wanted to clean up the cuts on his face, to kiss the pain way. But her mind was busy boxing all those emotions to the back of her head.

"Can we go now?" she asked instead.

"Yeah," he said with a cold look.

"Should I … help?" she pointed at his face. She didn't exactly want to, but for the sake of their little façade she just had to ask.

He gave her a silent shrug, which she took as a 'yes'. He led her back to where his things were. The cuts on his face weren't actually that bad, but still needed to be cleaned. The bruises forming on his ribs however were making her a bit nervous. "Anything broken?" she asked, keeping her eyes on his face.

"No."

"What about the stiches?"

"They're fine."

"Okay," she mumbled as she was finishing up.

Silently they got to his bike. He said his good-byes to the guys that were outside, but other than that didn't make that big of a deal about them two leaving so early. It kind of surprised her, cause until that point she had thought Clay wanted them both to check in on regular intervals.

She put her hands on his shoulders, afraid to hurt him if she'd wrap her arms around his middle.

"What are you doing?" he demanded in a raspy growl.

"Just," she started saying that she didn't want to hurt him, but decided that he didn't need to hear that, "nothing."

She moved her hands to his sides and waited for him to take off.

As they got to his place, she started worrying about one other thing. What was the sleeping arrangement going to look like? Did he think they were going to share the same bed? Not that they hadn't before…. but those were different times.

As if listening in on her thoughts, he said, "Take the bedroom."

She nodded, thanking him in her mind.

However it didn't take her long to wish that she had been the one to get the living room instead. Everything in his room looked and smelled like him. It felt like she was in his embrace and that made all kinds of thoughts run free in her head.

If took some time, but finally she was able to stop counting the sheep and drift off.

The sleep part however didn't last all that long. It was around four o'clock that a ringing sound woke her up.

She listened in on him talking to someone in the other room. He didn't say much, but something in his tone made her nervous. He sounded different.

The call didn't last look. Soon it got all quiet, only the sound of him pacing around the room reached her ears.

She muffled a shriek as something heavy flew against the wall.

Lexi knew it was better for her to not know what was going on, but somehow her legs just weren't listening to the sound of reason. She opened the door and took in the sight of Hap sitting on the couch, head buried in his palms.

* * *

Bad news… they just keep on coming, don't they? But then again you might actually like some parts of it this time..

As always thank you for reading and even bigger thank you for all your support!

I'm thinking I'll do a little snippet on Tig again in "Sweet like cherry pie". The whole thing is going to be like a small side-story. Not sure when the next chapter gets up exactly.. soon though! :D The first one-shot is already there, so if you're interested, check it out.


	29. I'll be there for you

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

Lexi was well amazed at the sight in front of her. She'd never seen him like that. He glanced at her as she took a small step closer, and without even having to ask him, she knew something was really wrong.

So wrong that she couldn't even decide whether it was better to silently sneak back to the bedroom or stay. The broken look in his eyes however made her stand awkwardly in the middle of the room. Her eyes roamed over him to the floor until they found the thing he had smashed against the wall- TV remote.

"What's wrong?" she finally asked, as he obviously wasn't going to start the conversation all by himself. He remained silent, looking at the table in front of him.

Lexi wanted to sigh in annoyance, but then again felt like it was somehow not the time to be a bitch. So instead she moved closer to sit down next to him.

"Mom's dead," he said without losing his eye contact with the table.

That threw her off completely. She had expected anything, but not that. Lexi didn't even know he had living relatives, after all they'd never really talked about things like that. And to be all honest, he didn't exactly give off a vibe of a person who cared that much of his elderlies even if they were alive… but apparently he did, cause he was visibly destroyed by the news.

"Oh.." she said feeling bad and stupid at the same time, "I'm sorry."

"Yeah," he mumbled, before getting up and grabbing his kutte from the armchair.

He was out the door so fast that she couldn't even really react. She stayed in the living room, listening to him ride off into the night.

She didn't know what to do. The only thing she did know was that she couldn't go back to sleep. Him riding around in that state of mind made her worry more than she wanted to admit. She looked around in his tiny house, wishing there was something to do to keep her hands busy. Sadly there really wasn't. He kept his house tidy and simple.

Something in the hallway however caught her eye- a stack of boxes that she hadn't noticed before. She walked to them and took a quick peak inside. They were filled with stuff from her apartment. Not everything, but things that might have looked useful to the person who had gone back to Indian Hills to empty her place.

But what was she supposed to do with those things? Scatter around his house? No.. This would have been more than weird. Leaving her things as they were, she went back to the living room. Sitting down on the couch he had used as a bed in total silence, she waited for him to come back.

At some point she must have fallen asleep, as by the time her ears picked up the sound of his bike pulling up to the house, it was almost noon.

He walked in, looked at her for a second, and disappeared behind the bedroom door. Something made her follow him. Maybe he needed someone to talk to.

But he wasn't there. The sound of water being turned on in the bathroom however cleared up the little confusion she was battling with.

With a hand on the doorknob keeping her from being with him, she closed her eyes. "No," she shook her head. No, she wasn't going to forget everything just because she wanted to ease his pain.

She almost stumbled over her own feet as she hurried out of that room of temptation. Her body was disobeying the orders her brain was giving out and it made her want to run as far away as she could.

But she didn't.

Instead she went to the kitchen to cook breakfast. Lexi was just setting out the plates when a manly scent reached her nose. She inhaled loudly and turned around.

He didn't even look at her. Actually it didn't really seem like he was looking at anything. His eyes were open, but they were empty.

Happy took a sip from the mug she had laid out for him and headed for the door without a word or even a sign that he'd noticed her presence.

She walked after him and before he managed to get away from her again, she silently asked, "When's the funeral?"

Lexi wasn't sure if he even heard, or wanted to hear, but still his head snapped back at her. "Later today."

"Can I come?" Lexi looked at him without a single clue of what was going on in his head, or hers for that matter.

He gave her a small nod. "Gemma or someone will pick you up."

"Great," she said with a sympathetic smile, "I mean alright."

There was nothing 'great' about being able to go to someone's funeral after all.

He looked at her and opened his mouth to say something else, but didn't. With a shrug he went out to his bike.

She eyed him through the window. On the surface he looked okay. More okay than he had looked in the middle of the night. Still he was visibly hurting and simply knowing that made her feel like shit.

It was later that evening that a black sedan pulled up in his driveway and a women she knew to be Clay's Old Lady jumped out. Lexi opened the door prepared for it to be awkward and all, but still she wasn't really ready for the greeting she got.

"So you're the magical one… to be all honest, I never though Hap would settle down," Gemma was giving her a proper once over. She had seen her before, but they hadn't exactly talked. Probably cause she had pointedly stayed away from Gemma. After all Lexi knew that she must have been a hurtful reminder of his father and by that also a reminder of the awful things that he had done to her.

"You ready?" she asked Lexi, who didn't know what to say or do.

"Yeah, I'm ready."

"Good," Gemma smiled, "you look nice."

"Thanks," Lexi looked down at the black dress she had thrown on. It wasn't anything special, it just fit her well. Yet again it also looked conservative and appropriate for a funeral, "So do you."

She opened the door to the passenger's seat and climbed in.

"Now that the pleasantries are passed along why don't we get to the chase? You love him?" Gemma fired off as soon as Lexi had buckled herself in.

"Excuse me?" Lexi narrowed her eyes.

"Love, baby, I assume you fuck him, but do you love him?"

"I think that something that doesn't concern anyone else besides me and Hap."

"Now that's where you're wrong. It concerns.. no actually it _worries_ everyone in the club."

"So if I say that I do, then everything is back to being safe and rosy in that love-filled biker world?" Lexi snapped back.

"More or less. So do you?"

As she could already see, Gemma was not the one to give up easy, so there was only one possible answer. "Yeah."

The rest of the way was okay. Gemma had stopped drilling her and instead filled her in with the way the club thing worked on situations like this. The guys were apparently doing a memorial ride. There was also going to be a wake later at the clubhouse.

As everyone had arrived, Lexi didn't know what to do, or where to stand. Though with a full of force nudge from Gemma she soon found herself in the front row, right next to Happy.

By the way that he simply gazed at her from the corner of his eye, she knew he was okay with her being there. On his other side stood the aunt Gemma had talked about on their way over. She smiled at her and Lexi couldn't help but smile back.

As people came up to offer their condolences, she could feel the tension waving off of Hap. However not a muscle in his face really moved until the moment his mother was lowered into the ground. He didn't cry, but looking up at him, she noticed his lower lip tremble for a second before he hid it with pressing his lips into a tight line.

Those emotions inside of him that he wasn't letting out must have been making him lose control.

She didn't know the woman who was causing this much hurt to a man a strong as a rock, neither was she by nature a person who felt bad for everyone and everything, but seeing Happy in such pain, she just couldn't keep her own eyes from spilling tears. The sad sight of him simply pushed her over the edge and she reached out to touch his cramped hand. At first he didn't react. Eventually though he slowly unclenched his fist to let her fingers find their place, being side by side with his.

She squeezed his hand as they covered the coffin with soil. She wanted to hug him, to tell him to just let go of those pressed down emotions, but didn't have the courage.

The wake part was peaceful and short. Nothing like the parties that place was used to. She stayed by his side, but they didn't speak, nor touch.

Until it was time to go home. She sat behind him, but unlike her usual demeanor of trying to keep air between their clashing bodies, she instead hugged him from behind as hard as she could. He needed it. He needed the comfort and closeness. He would have never said it to her, but she knew he did.

As they got home, it was business like usual. He started making his bed in the living room and she disappeared to his bedroom. It took her some time to gather the courage, but she couldn't just leave him like that. She needed to ease his pain somehow.

"I'm so sorry," she said, coming up to stand between him and the TV. He nodded, gazing in her eyes. She took a step closer, gulping in order to keep the lump in her throat from pushing out unwanted tears.

Without a word she reached out to touch his cheek. He closed his eyes and let out a sigh. Lexi moved her hand down his neck, until it rested against his fast-beating heart. With her other hand she took a hold of his kutte, gently pushing it down. There was a questioning look in his eyes, but he didn't stop her. He let her take his kutte and then come back for his shirt.

She pulled it over his head and looked at the inked torso. Gently she wrapped her fingers around his arm and motioned at him to stand up and follow her to the bedroom.

Lexi let go of him as they go to the other room and reached behind her back to pull down the zipper keeping her dress in place. Instantly she felt him push her hand away.

He was ready to take the lead… which in other words meant that her dress was soon on the floor, along with her bra.

Happy pulled her against his naked chest and buried his head into her neck. She moaned at the hot kisses he was leaving on her already burning skin, while his hands cupped her boobs, rolling over her nipples and making her gush wetness into her already soaked panties.

As his one hand remained attached to her breasts, his other hand moved further south, right under the lacy panties that should have been long gone. The heat and wetness waiting for him there made him growl into her neck and she couldn't help but smile.

She loved the feel of his hard dick pressed against her lower back, she loved the feel of his hands traveling along her body, she loved his lips that didn't take no for an answer… and maybe a part of her really loved him as well.

"Take me," she purred as he yanked down her panties.

She turned around to see him pull down his own underwear and the simple sight made her want to jump on him then and there. Still she managed to force herself to behave and lay down on the bed.

Expectantly she spread her legs as he kissed his way up her body. He stopped to show care to both of her nipples, before moving on to her neck while at the same time letting his tip tease her clit. She whimpered impatiently.

She didn't need to 'ask' twice though, without further ado he joined their bodies.

With every thrust she felt like she ready to explode. She wrapped her legs around his hips and moaned in pleasure.

By the little noises that he was making and by the way his breathing got shorter and louder, she knew he was close too.

She tug her nails in his ass cheeks to force him even closer. He groaned and pulled his head from her neck, looking down in her eyes with the same on-the-verge-of-breaking-down look that he'd had during the funeral. He leaned down to capture her lips, while picking up speed.

That was it for her. A second later she was moaning into his mouth as her walls contracted around him, with that making him cum as well. He grunted emptying himself inside her and she didn't want it to end.

He released her lips and looked down. Letting her see the tears he'd so far held back come to surface.

"Just let go," she said touching his cheek.

And as much as it surprised her, he did. A tear escaped his eye, followed by another. He made no sounds as he buried his head into her chest, crushing her a bit by the way he laid on top of her.

However just as quickly as he'd let it all out, he was back to his tough self.

He rolled off of her and she was afraid he was going to push her away, but looking in his eyes, he didn't feel as distant as he'd felt during the day. There was actually something soft in the way he looked at her as he reached out to pull her closer to his side.

She kissed his lips, before closing her eyes and letting sleep take over.

* * *

Something sweet to end that sad chapter! Hope you liked it.


	30. Keep a straight face when you tell a lie

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

* * *

Happy woke up with a grunt. There was a tiny fist lying on top of his face. It took him a moment to resist his urge to lift off at whoever had awoken him like that and another to realize it was Lexi. Happy's blinking eyes moved to the naked women curled up into a ball next to him. He held his breath for a second, afraid of what she was going to say… or even worse, expect him to say. Thankfully though, by the way that Lexi continued breathing evenly, he was sure she in reality was still asleep. That blow to his face had obviously been the side effect of her simply tossing and turning.

She was so beautiful. The way the morning light hit her face, the way it looked like she was smiling in her sleep, the way that the sheet only covered her from waist down. It all made his dick ache in need. For some god damn reason he couldn't get enough of her. It was staring to turn into a real addiction.

But none of that matter anymore, he had fucked it all up. What started out as a peaceful getaway from the shit-storm that up to this point still wasn't showing any signs of stopping, quickly turned into an agonizing nightmare.

What was he doing sleeping with her like that? Actually though, it wasn't the sleeping in the same bed part that made him furrow his brows, it was the night that had come before that. He'd broken down. Literally on top of her. She'd seen it all and he just didn't know how to even look her in the eyes after that… he never should have let her see him like that.

That was the main reason behind the feeling that made him want to get as far away from her as possible. Happy knew he should have pushed her away right after that unwanted incident, but seeing the hurt already forming in her eyes, he just couldn't. After all she'd been there for him. And even as he hated the mere fact that someone had seen him at his darkest and weakest hour, deep inside he was thankful that it had at least been her and not some random whore. But still. He had fucking cried like a bitch on top of her.

Trying not to make noise, he slid out of the bed and into his shorts. It wasn't like he could just duck out and never see her again. She kind of lived with him. Still however he needed to think this all through before she woke up.. and exactly for that he needed to not wake her.

He glanced at her over his shoulder, before silently opening up the door and sneaking out to the kitchen.

…

She woke up to an empty bed. She had kind of hoped that he'd wake her up with soft kisses, followed by even softer touches… in all the right places. But no, he was already gone by the time she opened her eyes and adjusted to the brightness filling out every inch of his navy blue bedroom.

Lexi bit her lip in disappointment, already knowing that he'd snuck out on purpose. Asshole.

She sat up and looked around. Her dress was on the floor, along with her bra. Her underwear though was nowhere in sight. With a yawn she pushed the sheets off her body and kicked her legs over the bed. Most of her clothes were still in those boxes stacked neatly in the hallway. Meaning it was either putting on the funeral-wear that was crumbled on the floor, strutting through the house buck naked, or first taking a quick shower and then doing the normal cleanness and towel combo.

Without further deliberation, she chose the last one. She loved taking a rather cold shower, it shook her awake in a millisecond. And being awake to deal with whatever was bound to come around the corner next was just the thing she needed.

Lexi wrapped a towel tight around her body and glanced at the mirror. There was a bite mark on her shoulder. She couldn't even recall the exact moment he'd bit her. After all he had been unusually gentle last night.

Lexi tried hard to remain mad at him, but then again she was tired of pretending like the anger he had towards him and his club won when it came to battling with the overwhelming feelings she no longer could deny. After all what was the whole point in fighting with the inevitable? He wanted her, she wanted him. Not to mention they had made a deal to pretend to be a loving couple. There was nothing standing in their way when it came to really trying the thing out. But those were her thoughts and by the way that he'd fled the bed like it was a crime scene, he obviously didn't see it quite like that.

Only covered with a rather tiny towel, she made her way to the kitchen.

"Oh shit," she yelped, startled by seeing Hap sit behind the kitchen table, "I thought you left."

He looked like he was about to say something, but didn't. He also had the look of someone who was chewing on glass laced with sand.

"About last night…" she started, unsure of where she was heading with the unexpected choice of conversation topics.

"Are you on a pill?" he asked, cutting into her little speech.

"What? Yeah, I am," she gave him a hard look, "oh shit, actually I didn't have them with me, which means I haven't really taken them these last few days."

Lexi wanted to smack her head against the wall. She'd forgotten all about those. Not to mention she'd also forgotten the other little dangerous fact - his cock was a high traffic zone.

"You clean? I am," she sat down on the other end of the table.

"Yeah," he grunted, pushing the chair back and standing up. "Take care of it," he threw a wad of cash in front of her.

Her eyebrows rose like someone had just pinched her with a needle full of botox. She'd been a fricking stripper and yet this was by far the lowest she'd ever felt. Not that she didn't understand where he was coming from, she would have gone out to get that SOS-pill without a second thought herself, but still him throwing money in her face like that... just wow.

"I'm going to the clubhouse, be back later," Hap said, sliding down his sunglasses.

Hearing the door shut behind him, she let out a long sigh. So that was all she got after the night that finally made her realize that this thing between them was something more than just a deal, or just an attraction.

The next few days went by in the same manner. He spent most of his time back in the clubhouse, doing whatever and whoever. Though she doubted he actually flaunted his 'cheatings' in front of Clay, she was sure he wasn't holding back in that department for her.

For god sakes, he didn't even look at her anymore. Unless of course she specifically spoke to him, and that didn't happen all that often.

They were also back to living in separate rooms- she in his bedroom and he, if not in the clubhouse, in the living room.

Meanwhile Lexi had also started looking for a job, but for some reason no-one was really hiring.

Might have been because of the person she was unwillingly attached to. Nonetheless she wasn't planning on giving up. Lexi couldn't actually believe that their little play had gone that far. But the simple fact was that she was really going to stay with him, whatever the reasons behind that, meant that she needed income, as well as distraction from being around him or if he was not around then from thinking about him. It was pointless to want something so distant and agitating. Also she was still angry at him for all that Clay-shit, but as the time passed she was slowly beginning to realize that he'd done that _for _her, not _to _her. After all he was risking his own life for her, even as it was clear as a day that he regretted that irrational decision.

He was also making sure that she stayed away from the clubhouse. He hadn't specifically said it to her, but it was heavily implied. Not that she would have wanted to spend her time in a place where Clay was able to literally breathe down her neck, but still.

Actually the implications of places, as well as people, she should have kept a clear distance from was growing by the day. He didn't even want her to speak to the mailman. The last time it had happened, Happy had literally sprinted up to them, snatched the paper from the guys shaking hands and slammed the door in his face. Yeah, the poor guy might have stared a bit too much at her chest, but still Happy was acting crazy. He didn't want her, but he also didn't want anyone else to want or even look at her, while of course he was at the very same time totally okay with getting whatever he wanted from those leather lovin' sluts. Lexi didn't even need to see him in action to know that, she could simply smell it on him.

With each day that passed, she was more and more sure that she'd just imagined the sweet guy who'd made love to her, not just fucked her. Cause the guy who had shown real emotions was definitely gone and back was the heartless killer who no-one could touch or hurt.

"I'm going back to TM," he shrugged on his kutte, looking at her as she nibbled on her dinner.

It was a Friday night and she knew he wouldn't be coming back.

"Can I come?" Lexi looked up, already feeling the weight of his gaze.

"Where?" he suddenly eyed her like she was talking in a foreign language.

"To the party?" she responded with a raised eyebrow. She didn't want to go the clubhouse, but it wasn't like she could go to some other party and the truth was she was bored. Really bored. She just needed a night out. Even if it meant feeling like there was a gun pointed at her at all times.

"No. You don't want to come there," he shook his head.

"I don't, but I also don't want to live as a caged animal. I wanna go out. I can go somewhere else, if you don't want me there," she smiled, knowing that her smirking expression and ironic tone were starting to annoy him.

"No, stay here. Don't need your shit tonight," he glared at her from where he was standing.

"What's the matter, babe. Afraid I'll keep you from getting with those biker whores?"

"Watch your mouth," he warned and turned around to walk out the door.

'Watch your mouth', that was all he had to say to her calling him out like that. He didn't even bother with trying to deny it. Fucking jerk. It was like he'd stuck a knife into her heart and started spinning it around… real slow.

"Well two can play that game," she muttered quietly, feeling rage striking a hold of the throne of emotions.

It wasn't all that long after he'd left the house that she had actually dressed herself up and grabbed a cab. She knew he wouldn't say a thing to her there. In public they still had to act like they were supposed to. So her little plan was practically fool proof.

She got out of the cab and made her way through the parking lot. The party was in full swing and just as she started feeling like coming there was a big mistake, she noticed Hap push some blond bitch off of his lap. Lexi turned on her heals and strode her way over to him with a fake smile curling up her lips.

Even as she was sure it was after all still a real stupid idea coming there like that, the look on his face made it all worth the while.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing here, dressed like that?" he snarled in a hushed voice, meeting her half way.

"I missed you, baby," she slid her hand down his arm.

"Cover yourself up," Happy growled looking down at her dress.

"But it's for you," she said with a playful smile. She had put a real hard thought into what she was wearing. Actually he was kind of right, she should have covered herself up on the way there at least, the cabdriver almost hit another car at one point, trying to peak at her from his rearview mirror.

She was wearing a tight, short and light pink dress that didn't leave anything to the imagination. She'd pointedly left her underwear home and although the looks she got from others around them were kind of making her want to wrap her arms across her chest, the glare coming from Hap was simply making her love every minute of their little show.

It wasn't the tightness of the dress that made it impossible for others to not look at her, it was the way her nipples showed through the almost sheer material, not only in shape, but also in color.

"Fuck it," he mumbled under his breath looking down at her chest. And just like that he reached out, in front of everyone else around them, and ran his thumb over the covered nipple that hardened in an instant.

She hadn't expected that, mainly cause he hadn't shown any interest in her since the funeral night, more like the opposite even.

She actually felt like she was going cum right there, without him even having to touch her all that much. A whistle reached her ears and she couldn't stop her cheeks from going from pink to red.

"Bad girl," Happy pulled on her hand to make her follow him to his bike.

She did as he said, although her mind was saying other things. Like what had the last few days been about? Why was he still playing with her like that?

She didn't know where they were going until they reached the far too familiar destination. It was the park he'd chased her in what felt like ages ago. He'd bent her down against the tree and spanked her ass just enough to make body betray her mind.

She followed him in silence, as he led her through the line of trees.

"Put your hands on the trunk," he growled in her ear.

She did as he ordered, unable to hide the knowing smile on her face.

"Wanna play games, huh?" Happy asked, pushing her dress up enough to reveal her naked bottom. She felt the first smack reach her butt cheek.

"I do," she murmured, as he brought in his other hand to push her legs wider apart.

"Like this game?" he asked again, lightly hitting her other cheek as his right hand started drawing circles on her clit.

"Yeah," she moaned, feeling the pleasure run through her body.

"Me too," he said in a low voice, removing his hand from her clit and opening up his jeans.

He entered her from behind and she dropped her arms lower on the tree. "Mmmh…. Aah… Hap," she moaned as he kept on moving in and out of her. "I can't," she whimpered, feeling the waves of orgasm reaching their destination.

He pulled out and just as she was about to protest, turned her around. He was smirking in an unusual way. Usually he simply dug deep into her eyes in his calm expression.

"It's in the way," he said tugging at her dress.

"It's a fricking public park, I won't be totally naked."

"You were the one who chose to not wear a bra," he said with a smile that only winners sported. That fucker had it all planned out. It was his way of making her pay for going in there dressed like that. She had guessed that he was going to strike back somehow, but not quite like that.

She wavered for a second before pulling her dress over her head and pulling him into a kiss.

With that entered her again, locking her between the tree and him. The rugged surface was scraping her back, but at that pleasure-filled moment in time, she just couldn't care less. He was literally fucking her into oblivion.

* * *

Thank you for reading! So.. sunny times ahead for these two? Would love to hear what you're thinking.

ALSO happy early birthday to Kay999! This one is for you! :*


	31. Hold me in your beating heart

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters!

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"What the fuck are we doing?" Lexi asked, her lips moving against Happy's shoulder. They were still in each other's embrace, coming down from their mutual high, and she didn't dare to move a muscle.

The heat radiating off of both of their bodies was doing enough of a good job to keep her warm, even as she was totally naked in a rather chilly night.

"I don't know," Happy answered on a heavy breath after a moment of silence.

As their breathings started to calm down, she took a quick glance over his back. The park was still dark and empty, but there were cars passing by not that far away.

"I should cover myself up," Lexi mumbled, suddenly painfully aware of her naked body.

He looked down at her with a faint smile and nodded. She was just about to reach for her dress, when he stopped her from moving and captured her lips with his.

Just as quickly as that had happened, he had stepped away from her. Now being the one who was scanning their surroundings.

"I'll take you home," he said while working on his belt.

"I was thinking… that maybe we could go back. I mean I wasn't kidding before, I'm tired of staying at your place all day every day. I wanna have some fun for a change."

"Looked like you had some fun just a few minutes ago," he said in his rough voice, but there was also a clear presence of a teasing smirk.

"Maybe.. but still I'd like to have a drink too, around other people. I won't cause trouble, if that's what you're so worried about."

Happy gazed at her. Wagering on her idea for a long moment before finally letting out a heavy sigh.

"You can't come looking like that, they'll eat you alive," he held his eyes on her chest.

"Oh come on, most of them have already seen everything I have to offer, what's the problem if.. " she started, but seeing his eyes turning dangerously darker than usual, she decided on another strategy. "Fine, let's go by your place, I'll put on a fricking coat if that's necessary."

…

As they were riding back to the clubhouse, she was for a second worried that it was all for nothing. Maybe the party had already died out? However as soon as they reach the right street, she was sure it was in fact still going hard.

"Act normal and talk as little as you can, no need for anyone to get suspicious," he said in a hushed voice as they were walking through the parking lot.

"Yea-yea, I know the deal."

She wanted to add something sarcastic as well, but her mind went blank as soon as her brain registered his hand casually resting on her lower back. That was something new, as he was usually all about either a heavy make out or nothing at all. She couldn't even recall a moment when he had just put his hands on her, at least not without a certain sexual agenda on his mind.

"No frickin' way," she gasped, instantly letting go of every other thought that had so far been going around in her head.

Looking ahead, there was only red flashing trough her eyes. Without really thinking or deciding, or actually doing anything with the reasonable part of her brain, she had started storming right toward the person who was causing that dangerous reaction.

After all hell had no fury like a woman _betrayed_. And betrayal hurt like a bitch.

There was only one clear voice in her head and that voice was demanding for justice.

She heard Happy's voice telling her to calm down, but at that point it was just something that went in from one ear and out from the other.

"Lexi," Cherry said, her eyes wide with shock.

"You stupid whore," Lexi's fist flew straight to her already purple nose. The audacity on that backstabbing bitch was simply astounding.

Cherry tumbled down, causing everyone to turn their attention away from the boxing ring and straight on them. "I deserve that," Cherry said, holding her hand against her blood oozing nose and not even trying to get back up.

"Get up," Lexi muttered through gritted teeth. That wasn't enough for her. In fact it had done nothing for her. Her brain was still filled with hatred that left no room for reasonable thinking. She knew there was a reason Happy, of all the people in the world, was trying to calm her down, but that reason seemed so far away from her at that moment that she couldn't even begin tell what it was.

"I'm sorry. I know you're mad at me- and have every right to be," Cherry apologized, looking up at Lexi with her Bambi eyes.

"You think? Get the fuck up," she was literally shaking with fury.

"Lexi," Happy's hand grabbed hers out of nowhere.

"Don't," she shook it off, while throwing a quick glance to the side.

Before Lexi even knew what she was doing, she had grabbed a nearly empty bottle of Jack from the table and was holding it in the way that left no doubt about her intentions.

"Whooa, okay now," Tig stepped in front of Cherry, "ladies, you're both extremely gorgeous, no need to fight about who's prettier, okay?"

Smashing the bottle not that far away from Cherry, Lexi threw both Cherry and Tig a murderous glare. "This ain't over."

She spun on her heals and quickly locked eyes with Hap. There was no need for words, even as he had kinda tried to stop her from behaving like a lunatic in front of everyone before, he was clearly pleased with her. Actually he even looked proud.

Lexi could hear Tig asking Cherry if she was okay, as she was making her way toward the end of the lot. It made her shudder with disgust. That gash deserved to be 'not okay'.

Walking in a way that might have been classified under stomping while storming, she didn't even need to look over her shoulder to know that Hap was right behind her. "Just take me home."

The short ride home did nothing to settle the storm of emotions in her head. Pushing past Hap, when they finally made it to his house, she headed straight to his bedroom. Looking over her shoulder, Lexi saw Happy slump down on the couch and reach for the remote. He was acting like he didn't have a care in the world and even as he had looked at her proudly before, he was quick to get back to his emotionless state of mind.

"Why didn't you stop me back there? I mean really. You could have," she asked, coming back to face him from the doorway.

"Looked like you needed it."

"What if I _need _something else too? You gonna be as generous then?" the devil inside her was free from its shackles- and it was ready to get its hands dirty and its problems settled, all of them.

"Like what?"

"Like a normal life? Or is that too much to ask, cause you're only willing to let me beat the shit out of Cherry and nothing else?"

"This old shit again? I'm fucking tired of it. You know the deal, ain't no point in bringing it up every single day. It is what it is. What do you want me to say?"

"Every day? More like ever since the funeral night we haven't been speaking at all. However no worries, I totally get it, you were simply too busy with sticking your dick in whoever, for us to have the time to have a conversation or two."

"That's your problem?" he glared at her impatiently.

Even as in her heart she knew it was in fact the actual problem bothering her, even more than the Cherry thing, the sad part was that she didn't know whether her mind was ready to put it all out in audible words.

Then again maybe it was, or maybe she was just simply tired of both of them dancing in circles around the topics that needed to be discussed.

"Partly," she looked down, unable to hold his skin cutting gaze.

"What do you want to do about it?" he asked in his raspy voice.

"Ain't really up to my deciding now, is it?"

"Maybe it is," he said, as she finally focused her eyes back on him.

"What exactly are you saying here? And think hard before you answer, cause there's another one of those bottles flying soon if you don't stop playing that game of push and pull with me."

"I'm the one playing games? Try looking at the mirror first. I can never tell what you really want. You're hot, and then you're cold. You're 'yes', then you're 'no'," he stood up, looking just as worked up as she did.

"You've been listening to Katy Perry?" Lexi couldn't help herself and crooked an eyebrow.

"What?" he narrowed his eyes questioningly.

"Nothing," she swallowed down the chuckle that was itching in her throat. "Okay-okay, why don't we both stop playing chicken for a while and say what we really mean?"

"Go ahead."

She wanted to stomp her feet like a child at his words, but managed to put that need on hold.

"Oh what a gentleman… but fine, I'll go first," she moved in front of him, arms crossed and eyes fixed. "I'm tired of pretending like this thing between us is just something that doesn't need a label. It does. And please do correct me if I'm wrong, but I feel like we've passed the stage of this being just a front we have to put up for others… Geez, what I'm trying to say is that I'd like it to be something real I guess."

"I don't do relationships," he said, much to Lexi's actual horror. "But I feel like I'm already in one… and I don't hate it."

"Wow, that's nice to hear," she mumbled, forcing up the corners of her mouth. Although instead of a smile, it looked like a grimace brought on by pain.

"You know what I mean."

"No I don't know. Please humor me and spell it out."

It was his turn to grimace. Those words that he was working on were not coming easy.

"I'm saying that I guess I want it to be something real too," Happy said in a low voice, his eyes never leaving hers.

"So… are we giving this real thing a try?" she was dying to hear the conformation that she hadn't even realized she was missing.

"I guess."

"Stop guessing, it's not a quiz. It's a simple yes or no answer and you already know my pick."

His hands were suddenly on her body, slowly moving down her sides. The serious look he had been holding onto so long had at some point withered away in its place was the sincerest smile Lexi had ever seen on him. Happy moved his head closer and for a second Lexi forgot how to breathe. His lips tickled hers as he softly spoke against them. "I'm yours."

"One more thing before I rip those jeans off of you," Lexi shivered as his lips moved across her neck.

"And what's that?" he asked, his hands pulling up her dress.

"There can be no others," she said, trying not to moan.

"Mhmm," Hap murmured to Lexi's neck.

"I mean it," she tried to push him away enough to get a look at his eyes.

"I don't need them when I have you."

It wasn't just those words that made her believe in his promise. It was the fact that he was an arrogant ass who didn't bother with telling shit just to make others feel good.

"Then please, please have me," Lexi raised his hands to let him pull the dress over her head. She loved the way his eyes moved over her body, before stopping on her pink strapless bra.

There was warmth in his eyes that she'd never seen before. It wasn't just the usual burning desire, it was something deeper and she was more than sure of the fact that her eyes matched his.

He was quick to take of his kutte, leaving him in a worn out SAMCRO t-shirt and light-blue jeans. Lexi's fingers crawled underneath his shirt, moving over his abs in unison. Happy let her take his shirt and throw it across the room. Actually it wasn't much of a throw… then again it did manage to knock over a water bottle that was in its way.

Pulling her along with him, Happy backed up until his legs touched the couch.

She shook her head, dragging him in the opposite direction. Much to her surprise he didn't protest to her initiative. Instead he silently let her lead him to the dimly lit bedroom.

Her mind was hazy with joy and happiness, and the thoughts that had been bothering her before were nowhere to be seen. She traced the lines of his various tattoos with her tongue, as he was silently lying on his back, occasionally grunting and running his hand through her hair.

As she had made her way up to his face, she realized she was grinning. Like really grinning like a happy person.

Against all odds and against all the bad shit that was happening around them- as well as _to_ them- that was the moment she felt like the world wasn't actually such a shitty place after all. At least not when you had the man you could not live without lying underneath you, making you feel the joy of life run through your veins and straight to your center.

She gave him a quick peck. At least she tried to end it while it was just a peck. However he must have had other ideas, as his lips were not letting hers go, and soon she was simply having trouble with breathing. He kissed her like he'd never kissed her before. It was sweet and tender, but also full of lust and feelings.

His hand had moved to her panties, rubbing her through them. She let out an audible moan, as he pushed the lacy thing to the side and pushed his two fingers in.

"Fuck, baby, you're so wet," he said between kisses.

She let out a low chuckle as she pushed herself off of him to lose the things that were getting in the way. Dropping her bra and panties to the floor, she moved to his jeans, which were trapping in his growing hardness. She removed them along with his boxers as he helped her by bucking up his hips.

She wanted to have him inside her then and there. Just to feel him fill her whole.

But first she needed to do something else.

Slowly moving up his body, Lexi stopped at his dick.

Wrapping her fingers around him, she then traced a circle with her tongue around his tip. She felt it twitch in response. It was enough of an invitation to have her move her head back down and took him in her mouth, as deep as she could.

She continued on sucking him, while at the same time playing with her already dripping pussy.

"I'm.. gonna… come," he grunted, pulling on her hair.

Giving it one last pull, she got up on top of him, and after guiding his throbbing member to her entrance, lowered herself down.

Closing her eyes and arching her back, she let out a pleasure filled whimper. He was touching everything that needed to be touched. Rocking up and down, she felt her release begin to rush through her body.

His hands were digging in her hips, trying to make her move faster, harder. Her quiet moans had quickly turned into house shaking screams and his grunting was getting louder by the minute.

Hap bucked up his hips as a low growl escaped his lips. The feel of him coming apart underneath her made her internal muscles contract around him ferociously. Sweat was dripping down her chest as she rode out her orgasm.

Lying side by side, hands entwined, she felt him looking at her.

She turned on her side to let her free hand travel across his cheek. He closed his eyes and she found it to be a perfect moment to move in and plant a quick kiss on his half-way open lips.

"Can I ask you something?" Happy's voice sounded even raspier than usual after a few minutes of silent smiles.

"You're gonna ask anyways, so shoot," she said, her head resting on his chest.

"What exactly where you planning on doing with that bottle before?"

"I honestly don't know. Seeing her there, looking like nothing had happened, it just flipped some switch in me. It felt like rage devoured me whole and then spit out someone I couldn't even recognize."

"I get that."

"Oh, I bet," she raised her head enough to look in his eyes.

Thinking about the night that was behind them, there was one thing that until now hadn't even crossed her mind, but now that she had thought about it once, it was burning her brain cells like poison.

"Do you think that Clay might read something out of that thing? I mean I saw him outside, maybe I should have gotten Cherry alone first."

"Don't worry about that right now, after all I'm on your side here. If there's something, I'll take care of it," he sounded sure of himself.

Even as she wanted to believe him, there was this bad feeling that kept on nagging at her. A feeling that they were both underestimating the devil they were facing.

…

"Sometimes I feel like you love that bird more than you love me," Clay complained, looking around in the bedroom, only to finally spot Gemma feeding that stupid white feather bag.

"Sometimes I do," Gemma smirked.

"Get back here," he motioned next to him.

"I need you do to something for me today," Clay said, running his hand over Gemma's.

"Yeah?"

"I need you to keep an eye on that Weston gash while I push the truth out of Hap. That thing yesterday.. I felt like the whole story was bullshit the moment it passed through my ears, but after seeing her go after the sweetbutt, I just know I was right the whole time."

"You think Hap would lie about something that could harm the club?" Gemma eyed him questioningly.

"That's the only thing that has kept me from…," he dropped the sentence, " I just don't get his part in all this."

"Maybe the bitch has something over his head as well?" Gemma suggested.

Whatever the case was, Clay was determined to get to the bottom of it.

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Sorry about this long pause. I don't even have a good apology for this. But I do hope you liked this chapter enough to forgive me : ).

If you wonder where the hell did Cherry jump out from, then go read Sweet like cherry pie, I put out another little one-shot to clear that up.

So our hero is getting a bit soft and all, but would Happy really stick by his promise to be on her side, even if that side is against Clay? I don't know yet. Do you?

Until next time and thank you thank you thank you for reading and getting back to me. XO


	32. Where the future lies

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of Sons of Anarchy's original storylines and characters

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"So tell me, how hard was it to come to terms with the fact that you're not immune to this stuff?" Lexi mumbled into the tattooed arm that was stretched out underneath her head.

"What stuff?" his other hand slowly travelled down her thigh, before it moved up again.

"This… you know… feelings and such," she snuggled closer, loving the warm embrace… _ and loving him. _

"I haven't and I'm still blaming you," he said with a foreign-feeling amusement evident in his rough voice.

"Actually I'd say the blame is mutual."

"Probably," Hap touched her shoulder with his lips.

"Though, to be all honest, I still don't see where we're heading with all this," Lexi's voice was suddenly serous.

"Never took you for a one to live in the future."

"I'm not. I just can't help but feel confused and disoriented. Though I know for sure that I more than just _want _you, there's still also this awful feeling that comes with living right under Clay's nose, like there no peace in the horizon. He makes my skin crawl, he killed my father and more than likely still wishes the same fate for me."

"Do you trust me?" Happy had stopped the cuddling and was suddenly propped up on his elbows.

"I don't trust him."

"That's not what I was asking."

"I know… ahh, why are we even ruining this beautiful morning by talking about him?" Lexi's smile was obviously forced, but for Hap it was better than continuing on that road that was one way or another definitely leading to a serious argument.

It hadn't gone by his ears that she hadn't said that she trusted him, but a part of him really did understand where she was coming from. Hell, did he even really trust in anyone other than himself? It was a lot to ask from her, especially after all she'd been through. But with time he was going to earn that trust. That he was sure of.

"Have any other ideas then?" he smirked at her slightly flushed cheeks.

"A few," Lexi bit her lip in a suggestive way.

"Good," he was already working on her wet center with his fingers.

"So good," Lexi moaned, unable to keep her hips from bucking.

"It will only get better," he groaned into her mouth as she reached out to grab his already throbbing member.

"Oh yeah?" she whimpered, feeling him out. "Show me… please."

"O yes, I will," he brought her leg to his hip and eased himself in.

..

"So, what are you up to today?" Lexi asked, her eyes locked to the steaming cup in her hands.

"Club stuff later, going to see my aunt first," Happy had come to stand in front of her. With a slight bow, he had reached the level of her face and gave her a quick kiss on the lips.

"I see. So I'll see you in the evening?" Lexi didn't intend on showing her disappointment, but she couldn't help but pout at his words. Sure they couldn't spend the rest of their days in bed with each other, but it didn't feel like he even would have wanted to.

He gave her a slow nod, eyes fixed on hers and by the look of it reading each and every thought going through her head. "Just say what's on your mind," he said on a sigh, just as there was a loud knock on the door.

Both of their heads snapped to where the sound was coming from. "Stay here," Happy muttered, his eyes never leaving the door.

"Hap, I doubt someone with dubious reasons would feel the need to knock," Lexi said, following him with her eyes.

She could hear the familiar voice as soon as Happy opened the door… Gemma.

"Hey, baby," Gemma greeted her, walking in like she owned the place.

"Hi," Lexi couldn't keep herself from cocking an eyebrow. This was way too early for a social call, especially from her. "I should leave you two to… " Lexi motioned to the other room, but was cut off mid-sentence.

"No-no. I'm actually here to see you," Gemma gave her a smile, before dropping her purse onto the kitchen counter. Bitch had no manners whatsoever.

"Me?" Lexi kept looking toward Hap for answers, but his face was just as clueless as hers.

"Thought that we should get to know each other a bit better, don't you think?" she made the words sound innocent, but the question behind them was blunt and searching.

"Yeah, sure," Lexi lied, her brain going double-speed, hectically looking for a way out. No way was she going to spend the day with her- and just like that the sitting-home-alone agenda seemed too good to be true.

"But… eeem" Lexi's begging eyes fell back on Happy as she formed her idea into legit words. "We were actually just heading out to see Hap's aunt… maybe some other time?"

"Oh really? Okay then, no worries, darling. All we have is time," Gemma smirked, turning her head for a slight moment to gaze at Happy, "you should bring here to the clubhouse later."

He had the perfect poker face, even Lexi couldn't tell whether he was going along with the lie, or just waiting for a moment to say something completely out of line.

"I would however suggest you put on something a bit warmer. It is quite windy out there today," Gemma pointed at her shorts and tank top combo, before setting her eyes on Happy again. "Join me for a smoke, while your _Old Lady_ gets ready?"

As it turned out, Gemma wasn't just out to get her. The way she had said the 'Old Lady' part was more than provoking. Thankfully though, Happy made no point of reacting. Instead he simply nodded, following the Queen Bee out.

"Shit," Lexi muttered as the door swung shut behind them. Gemma was obviously sticking around on purpose to see whether or not they were really going to Happy's aunt.

Actually it would not have surprised her, if Gemma had a plan of actually following them there as well.

Lexi took the little time she had and made herself as presentable as she could.

Yeah, she had met Happy's aunt before, but that had been a whole other situation. She and Hap had been in a whole other situation. What the fuck had she set herself up for now?

Only one thing was sure- it felt like she was preparing for a beauty pageant. There were literally voices in her head making up answers for possible questions, while her hands were working magic with touching up her face.

When she was finally out the door, give or take five to ten minutes, Gemma was still there, a very evident presence of curiosity securing her in place.

"Ready," Lexi walked to Happy's bike, making sure to only look at him while she did. Among all those questions that she had prepared herself for were non that would have worked for Gemma, so it was better to just try out the avoiding strategy.

Handing her a helmet, Happy said his goodbyes to Gemma. Lexi watched the woman get in her car as she climbed on behind Hap. "Sorry."

"It's okay," Happy had his head turned to the side.

"Did she even buy any of this?" Lexi watched the car drive off.

Much to Lexi's surprise, that made Happy chuckle. "Neh, said she was happy to help us take that big 'meeting-the-family' step forward. Hold on."

Lexi's mind was racing over Happy's words as they sped through the town. She hadn't exactly underestimated Gemma, but she hadn't been extremely paranoid about her either... guess she should have been.

The tiny house his aunt lived in was soon in sight, as was a strange feeling of anxiety.

"Maybe I should wait out here," Lexi mumbled, nerves getting the best of her.

"She would have my ass for that," Happy's head motioned to the frame that was peeking out from behind the curtains.

"I'd actually love to see that," she unwillingly followed him to the door.

"No doubt about that."

"Happy, my dear boy," Dolores had the door open before Happy could properly knock.

Lexi watched his gruff and rough guy being pulled into a motherly embrace. Somehow it wasn't as odd-looking as she had expected.

"Hi," Lexi smiled, as the older women then took a step back to look at her.

"I'm so glad you came along," Dolores took her hand, tears blurring up her eyes.

Was it about coming along with him today or coming along in general? Whichever way, Lexi couldn't keep her smile from growing even wider. That woman was the picture of sincerity and warmth.

"Come in-come in," she urged them forward, before disappearing to the kitchen.

Lexi didn't know whether to offer her help and by that risk the chance of getting interrogated, or to just stand in one place and pray for the visit to end as good as it had started.

A set of hands entwined around her waist right as a low voice whispered in her ear, "Relax."

"I'm trying."

"I never thought I'd see the day… I'm so glad I did," Dolores had appeared out of nowhere, grinning at the sight of them two being all lovey-dovey.

Thy spent the rest of the afternoon listening to Happy's aunt ramble on about whichever topic that came to her mind. She was adorable and heartwarmingly friendly, so it didn't take long for Lexi to actually feel somewhat relaxed.

"Are those neighborhood punks giving you any trouble?" Happy asked as the topic moved to his aunt's neighbors.

"It's alright, kids are kids. I just have to remind them not to step on the flowers, other than that they don't bother me that much," Dolores shrugged it off.

"Where are they?" Happy was already on his feet.

"No, honey, don't. I don't want to start any trouble," Dolores got up as well, looking like a helpless mousse next to the lion that Happy obviously was.

"They started the trouble. I'm ending it."

There was that brief desperate look that Dolores threw at Lexi. Actually maybe Lexi had even misread it, but still up along with the two she was, silently pulling on Happy's hand to keep him from storming out the door in his mission of scaring off whoever would have the courage to stand in his way.

"Happy," Lexi silently begged, watching the worried look on Dolores's face.

He glared at her, but much to everyone's surprise actually calmed down. "But you'll call me the minute they do anything, right?"

"Of course. Lexi, would you like more tea?" Dolores gawked at her.

"Eem.. I.." she tried to answer to the back that was already moving toward the kitchen.

Maybe Lexi should have said something to the obviously still bothered man beside her, but at that moment she actually didn't dare.

His aunt came back, but instead of a teapot, she was carrying a small box.

"I know you've declined it before, but I really think that your mother would want you to have it now," she held out the obviously ring-bearing box.

Lexi couldn't believe her eyes or the angry look on Happy's face.

"I don't need it," he said without hesitation.

"But you might need it one day."

"I won't."

"Happy.." Dolores said, even as her eyes were directed at Lexi, "please just make an old lady happy and take it."

While the old lady part was for sure about her, it nonetheless struck an alarming idea in Lexi's head. Did she expect there'd be a change of getting married one day? Would that make _her_ happy?

He shook his head, "We should get going. I'll drop by later this week."

His aunt nodded with a sad smile. The lightness that had surrounded the room before had suddenly dimmed to nothing, and frankly Lexi couldn't wait to get out of there.

There were too many thoughts for her to go through after that visit.

And the heaviness of those thoughts remained with her throughout the ride home. Actually the need to deal with those ideas got even stronger as they enter the place she now _should_ have called home. Then again was it really her home? Would it ever be? She had no rights for it in one way or another and that was for sure.

"Your aunt is real nice," Lexi commented, watching Happy read something from his phone.

"Yeah."

"I'm glad I got to really meet her."

"Mhm."

"Am I bothering you?" Lexi asked with a voice that was more than edgy.

He flipped the phone shut and turned his full attention to her.

She searched her mind for a smooth way to start the dangerous conversation. "Why didn't you take the ring?"

"_Applause for the smoothest conversation starter ever,_" Lexi though with sarcasm. Waiting for his answer, she sat down.

"Like I already said, I don't need it," his stare was cautious.

"So, just to set the record straight, you are _never_ planning on getting married?" Lexi held his glare with audacity.

"No," was the simple answer that slipped over his lips.

"I see," Lexi let her eyes fall onto her lap. She wasn't disappointed… or was she?

"Spit it out," he said, coming a step closer.

"What? I have nothing to say, it's your decision," she still couldn't look at him.

"Lexi," his raspy growl made her head jump up on command. "Fuck, if you have something to say, then now's the time. I ain't gonna get into this conversation again."

"Oh, I'm so sorry for the inconveniences in your set in stone plans for the future. It's just that if this here has any kind of a future, I'd like to know things like this ahead of time."

"Is that your way of telling me that you want to get married, because I swear to God, you women always have to talk around the corner."

"Maybe… I mean I'm not saying I want you to drop to your knees right away, but to be all honest, I would like that to be at least a possibility. And when you're so clearly saying that it ain't ever getting to that point, then I'm just… "

"Marriage means shit. It's just a paper," he sat down on the table that was in front of her.

"Don't start crying," he noticed the sudden glimmer in her eyes, "I'm not saying that you're just a fuck to me. Geez, woman, I'm letting them call you my Old Lady, I'm willing to put my crow on you. To me those things mean a lot more than some marriage bullshit."

"You're willing…" she snorted, although his words did make her feel a tiny bit better.

"Okay. I _want_ to," he rephrased.

She looked up to meet his dark eyes and smiled, "I understand, and I don't blame you for the way you see things, but to me marriage is not just a set of signatures on a worn paper… and I am sorry for raining on our parade like this, but I'm just not so sure that a tattoo and a biker-title would be enough for me in the long run. I need some hope too."

"Fine," Happy stood up in an abrupt movement.

Lexi couldn't help but feel like the air had been kicked out of her. So it was over before it had even really begun- and all because of her dream-filled head and running mouth. Shit, they had been an 'official' thing for what? A day?

And during those 24 hours, she had managed to bring up marriage? Like really.. FRICKING MARRIAGE? Was she unknowingly on drugs or something?

"What are you doing?" she gasped. It had happened in just a matter of seconds, but kneeling in front of her he was.

"Happy," she watched him with wide eyes, "I didn't mean it like that. Not now. Are you crazy?"

"Will you be my wife?" he sounded dead serious.

"Is this a joke? You just said…"

"I know what I said, but you obviously want this, and I… I really want you to be happy with me. And if this is what you need for that, then let's get it over with right now. Can't have you just waiting and hoping for this forever," his words were by definition not perfect, but the willingness to go along with all this, even as it was not something that he wished for, was.

Suddenly the tables had turned. Looking at him, as he waited for the answer, she couldn't say a 'yes' or a 'no'. In fact she couldn't really even think about those two options- and their aftermaths, each as brutal as the other.

Yeah, she wanted to be married someday… the emphasis on 'someday'.

* * *

Finally I got this down. I feel like I wrote this forever… for which I'm also really sorry, in case you've been waiting. Anyhow, HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS!

So about the chapter.

Too soon?

Maybe. Then again I would think that no matter how much time, Hap would need a violent push anyhow, might as well get it over with right away. Or what do you think?


	33. I wear it just for you and me

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of original storylines and characters, or anything else that you might recognize.

* * *

"I think I'm actually going to be sick."

Lexi searched for the right words, but judging by the horrified/ angry look on his face, those were not it. "Not in the bad way. Not that there is a good way to be sick, but you know sometimes when people say things like that, they don't actually mean them in the literal sense."

Listening on to her rambling, the look on his face slowly shifted into confusion. She finally stopped to take a breath. "Sorry, I have no idea what I'm talking about."

"Is that a 'no'?" Hap demanded, clearly not enjoying the positon he was in.

"No… I mean I don't know… You're confusing me."

"In what way? Geez, woman, I'm on my god damn knees, asking you to marry me. And that's all after you specifically told me you wanted me to. What's the fuck is there to be confused about?"

"I just don't want to force you into this," she confessed on a sigh, fearing what he was going to say next.

"I want _you _and that's all that matters. If you want there to be a paper to prove my words, then fine by me. And for the record this is by no means you forcing me, it's just us two meeting I'll ask you again, and this will be the last time because you won't see me kneeling like this ever again," Happy looked deep into her eyes. "Alexandra Weston, will you marry me?" he said without blinking, or letting her interrupt him in any way.

"Yes," she said with a look just as serious, before bending down to give him a proper long and lingering kiss.

Coming up for air, she raised a questioning eyebrow, "Never heard you use my full name before. In fact I didn't think you even knew."

"Heard it when you made the phone call to get your father's number," he explained, "thought I should remember it in case I wanted to scream it out at one point."

"You're crazy. And you don't scream out names," she jokingly nudged his shoulder.

Happy's voice got low and sultry. "Yeah, I guess so, that's more of a job for someone as submissive as you."

"First of all I'm not submissive. Second of all, besides being crazy, you're also a jerk."

He smirked, taking his time to look into her eyes. "You love it."

"Yes I do."

The look they shared after that said it all. Love wasn't just in the air. It had tugged its way into both of their hearts.

…

"Where do you want it?" Happy asked, as they were lying on their soon to be marital bed. Legs and hands entangled.

"Want what?" she turned her head to see his face. It was a bit too serious for her liking.

"The crow."

"Oh…"she had totally forgotten about _that_. "I don't know. Does it have to be visible?" she wondered, trying to figure out if she'd be okay with walking around with that kind of a marker seen at all times.

"That's up to you."

"I think I know the place," she finally decided, after a minute of internal-debating on the pros and cons of the whole thing.

"And?" he eyed her impatiently.

"Patience, hon."

"If you want patience, you're sharing your bed with the wrong guy," his voice was cold, but the look on his face thankfully said different.

"Well I can go.. "she shrugged, making it look like she was getting up.

A set of hands flew out to keep her in place. "I'm _never_ letting you go again."

"Then I guess you'll just have to wait and see."

"Get your beautiful ass up now," he growled, getting up himself, "I don't wait."

"You really think there's a tattoo-parlor open this late?" Lexi couldn't keep a straight face.

Happy on the other hand looked perfectly serious.

"My head is literally ringing from all the craziness that has happened tonight, can be please just put a tiny pin in it and leave the tattoo-nightshift for a different kind of clientele?" Lexi yawned, pulling the covers over her naked body.

"Remember the meeting each other half-way part? Get up," Happy reached down to yank the cover away again.

"I know we're not a regular couple, but for crying out loud, we really just have to do absolutely everything in a totally fucked up way, don't we?" Lexi shook her head in surrender. Bargaining with ink and marriage weren't exactly the things written out in the book about common ways on how to develop a relationship.

Happy remained quiet, evidently still waiting for her to get up.

With an audible sigh, Lexi kicked a leg over the bed, seeing that he was not backing down. "Okay, but I'll need a minute to get dressed and ready."

"Actually you don't," there was a weird glimmer in Happy's eyes.

Lexi cocked an eyebrow, looking down at her bareness and feeling more than confused.

"Just put this on," he then threw her the silky robe that was resting on the closet door.

"You plan on explaining anything? Or just expect me to follow your lead totally blindfolded?" Lexi wondered, tying the robe tight around her body.

"Patience, hon," he said in the same manner as she had before, but with his voice it sounded way more dangerous than mischievous.

Happy finally explained to her that he was in fact doing the ink himself, as he made her sit down in the kitchen. Watching him get the equipment ready, Lexi couldn't help but smile. Nothing in their relationship was easy or usual, but against all odds, they still simply fit so well with each other. For example there was never a need to fill the silence with meaningless words, somehow they were comfortable in any way, as long as they were just honest about what they really wanted.

Maybe she was actually imagining this, but something in the way that he looked at her had in the previous week changed as well. Again, maybe it was just her seeing things, but it simply felt like the powerful lust that had obviously always been there had just now started sharing the throne with something way more forceful and meaningful than simple sexual desire.

"Where?" Happy asked, without raising his eyes from the tools he had laid out on the kitchen counter.

"Here," Lexi said, waiting for him to turn his head.

As he did, she held out her right hand, turning it so that her palm was facing up. "I want it on my wrist. I was thinking about whether or not I want others to see it before and what I came up with was that I actually really don't care. This is for you… and me. And _I _don't want to hide it somewhere where I personally don't see it at all times."

Happy nodded, softly tracing his thumb over the spot that was about to be covered with his crow.

"I also have one other idea," Lexi said, biting her lower lip. "I was thinking that… maybe you could add a tiny smiley face somewhere as well? Like the ones that you have."

Happy's face grew serious and his eyes turned darker than usual. "They don't represent anything good."

Lexi couldn't tell, whether she should keep on pressing on the matter, but something inside of her told her to continue. "I don't care. Good or bad, it doesn't matter, they still represent you, and that is all I care about."

"Okay," was his only word, before he continued with his preparations. As it turned out, he had already designed the sketch and it was beautiful. And the little smiley-face addition only made it better.

Any doubt she might have had so far had vanished into thin air. This was the right thing to do. She simply knew that there was no way that she would ever come to regret any of her decisions that had led her this far with him.

The process altogether didn't take that long, nor was it too painful… although she might have winced a few times, causing him to stop and wait for her 'Keep on going' nod.

"Don't mess it up now, okay, but I just have to say it out. I'm tired of looking for the right moment, when all the moments seem to be equally right for me anyways. I know that were perhaps rushing with everything and clearly we don't know everything about each other, but I just know in my heart that this is it and I need to say it." Lexi eyed the man before her as he was finishing up the work, "I love you, Happy."

The buzzing stopped and he looked up, straight into her eyes. "I love you, too. Always will."

She smiled, fighting with the tears that were pressing their way out.

"Good, now finish this up… I really want you to take me here and now," she grinned, feeling like she was the happiest person in the world.

…

"I want you to come to the clubhouse with me tonight," Happy said as they were eating breakfast.. or actually it was a rather fitting time for lunch.

They had spent the whole morning in bed, unable to crawl out of their little perfect bubble of bliss.

"You sure?" Lexi watched him over her steaming cup of coffee.

"Yeah. They're my family and they should know. Besides this will be the proof that Clay needs and _you_ will no longer need to worry about anything."

Lexi knew he was right, but something was still making her reluctant. Still she also knew it had to be done.

"I guess I'm going to go and show off my new accessory then… yay," Lexi cheered in an obviously fake way.

Happy glared at her a bit, but other than that seemingly decided to let it slide.

…

"Hey there, pussycat," Tig greeted, walking over to her and Hap.

"Hey, Tig," Lexi smiled. As crazy and as he was, he was still the friendliest face in the crowd that she was about to see.

"You look… may I?" Tig reached out his hand, making Lexi back away a bit. "Oh c'mon, kitty, I just want to pet you, make you purr."

"Tig!" Happy growled in a threatening tone.

Tig chuckled, his eyes still glued to Lexi, moving up and down.

"What happened there?" he then motioned with his head at her wrist, "I mean is it what I think it is?"

The looks that were passed between Lexi and Happy said it all.

"Really," Tig's expression went from surprised to smirking. "I guess this it then, love, no more sneaking around behind Killer's back. It truly was lovely until it lasted, but yeah… at least we both know that our secret love will never die."

"I'll miss you, too," Lexi joined in on the joke.

The only person who obviously didn't find any of this even remotely funny was Happy.

The look on his face was actually on the not so pleasant scary side.

"Oh c'mon," Lexi nudged him, as they were walking inside and he had yet to say a thing after their little encounter with Tig, "I can't decide whether your reaction is sweet or simply alarming."

"What do you want to hear? Me encouraging you two to continue whatever that was before?" Happy snapped, holding the door open for her.

She stopped mid-step to turn around to face him. "Let's kiss and make up."

He wasn't making a move, but neither was he pulling away when she did.

They were totally blocking the entrance for a good minute, locking their lips and getting lost in each other.

As he finally pulled his head away, the frown he had previously sported had turned into an almost invisible, but still definitely present, smile.

It wasn't a typical party night, but there were still a lot of people gather around, as well as inside, the clubhouse. Drinking, talking and laughing.

"So… are we telling them the other thing as well?" Lexi asked over the music, unsure of whether Happy was only intending to show the others her crow, or tell them about the marriage thing too.

Happy looked at her, then around. Without a word he started ushering her forward, until they were finally face-to-face with Clay.

"We're getting married," Happy straight away spitted out with a voice loud enough to catch almost everyone's attention.

With a swift movement, Clay removed the brown burning cigar that was hanging between his lips. "What?"

* * *

Sorry that these updates are taking so long right now. I just don't have much time to get them out quicker.

Nonetheless I do hope you enjoyed! : )


	34. Love comes with such a cost

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of original storylines and characters, or anything else that you might recognize.

* * *

There was this buzz of confusion that instantly filled the room after Happy's abrupt declaration. Actually a part of Lexi was just as confused by it as the rest of the people in that crowded room.

Clay's eyes moved from Hap to Lexi. It wasn't just a stare of intimidation, it was a stare of disbelief. He clearly had never expected it to get this far. Well, neither had she… nor Hap. As much as Clay seemed to have been baffled into silence, he also seemed to be quite far from getting accustomed to the surprising news. Instead Lexi could practically see the wheels of destruction spin in his head.

However, just as the probable death threat was about to pass through Clay's lips, it was Tig who caught everyone's attention by letting out a full-hearted laugh.

"Seriously, kids?" he managed to say through chuckling. "I mean yeah, congratz," he continued while grinning. "I guess the hell has actually frozen over now… which is good, I'm not that big fan of heat anyways."

As Tig continued with his monologue, Gemma silently walked up to stand firmly between Clay and Lexi. As Gemma raised her hands to bring them around her apparently shaking body, she also conjured up what for the first time actually felt like a sincere smile without any kind of trickery hidden behind it. "I'm happy for you two," she said out loud enough to cut through Tig's still ongoing banter.

"Congratz, brother," Jax was the first Son to actually move in to hug it out with Hap.

Soon there was a line of people waiting to say their congratulation, minus one specific exception. As Lexi's eyes searched for Clay, she soon found him talking something with Gemma under hushed voices.

"Taming our killer, aye? Good luck with that," Chibs mused while giving Lexi a proper manly hug.

"I'll definitely need that luck," Lexi let out a breath of relief. Even as Clay was not in-your-face happy about the situation, he wasn't exactly raging either. Plus everyone else seemed to take it really well. Which was more than she had expected.

Soon after that it was back to the usual party business. Lexi was snuggled with Hap on one of the black leather couches, feeling the weight of the world drift off of her shoulders, but at the same time still continue to loom over her head. The trouble was far from being over, probably, but still she also couldn't just mope at that specific moment in time. She felt good. Even if it was just for the moment.

"No offence, sweet cheeks, I totally believe you've turned this crazy ass inside out in a good way, but fucking hell, I just need to prove it in my way as well," Tig slumped down onto the table in front of them, a crazy and challenging glimmer in his eyes.

"Huh?" Lexi could only squint her eyes, not exactly getting what Tig was implying at.

Understanding her confusion, Tig pointed his finger at Happy's face, "You see that perfect poker face, I need to beat it off to actually get a glimpse of what's really going on in his brain. I promise, in the end he'll remain as… well, I don't know what you see in him exactly… anyhow, he'll be fine."

"Or are you already too whipped to take me on, hubby?" he then turned his question straight to Hap.

"Oh I will whip you, Tiggy," he said, before looking at Lexi.

The question was in his eyes. Of course Lexi didn't want him to go and fight, but as she knew that it was just for 'fun', although not for her, she couldn't start bitching and commanding, that was not what their relationship was _ever _hopefully going to be like. The constant controlling shit would drive her just as insane as it for sure would drive Hap.

"Kick his arrogant ass," she smiled, closing in to give her man a proper kiss.

"My turn," Tig was making a kissing face at her as soon as she and Hap had finished.

"In your dreams."

"Oh you do not want to encounter me in my dreams," Tig yelled over his shoulder as he and Hap moved through the room.

After a short debate with herself, Lexi decided on staying inside. She did not want to see Happy getting struck in his face or something of that kind in general. Although, staying inside alone was a bit disturbing as well.

"Care for a drink?" Tara, the doctor she had once shouted at in search of the answer to the question of what _she _got from this life of craziness, asked.

It felt like a million years ago. Those were different times, she couldn't see it then, but now, actually letting herself admit the love for that raging biker of his, she could no longer worry her head over that question. It wasn't about _what_ anyone could get from a life like theirs, it was rather _who.. _ and that specific _who_ of hers was definitely worth the hell that came along with loving him.

"No, thanks," Lexi smiled.

"So, when's the wedding?" Tara continued, resting her own drink on the bar counter they were standing beside.

"Oh… actually, we haven't decided that yet."

She nodded understandingly.

"You and Jax?" Lexi asked in return.

It was Tara's turn to get caught off guard. "We're actually not in that stage."

"And they are neither," a menacing voice announced behind Lexi's back.

She turned around in an instant, already knowing who she was about to face.

"You actually think that just cause he gave you the crow, which by the way was obviously just to prove a point to the club, and because of who know what reasons he actually proposed, he will in the end actually carry it through?" he laughed in the most annoying way before continuing with a finger pointed at Lexi's face. "If you really believe that…hmm, well let's just say that you're just as naïve as you are stupid. Happy will never marry you, you'll just be left waiting for the thing that has been doomed from the very beginning. I'll be straight with you, even without the club-related shit that alone makes this the stupidest thing I've ever heard, you're just a tempting pussy Happy will at one point get bored of," he spat it out like venom.

"You don't know that," Lexi said, feeling herself getting pushed over the edge.

"Oh, but I do. And if you're pretty little brain can't grasp even that, then you're even more of an idiot, deserving to be gotten rid of, than that father of yours, rest his rapist soul."

She wanted to say he was wrong, that he knew nothing. But even as the words were ready in her mouth, she couldn't open up her lips without a whimper passing through as well. Everyone had stopped whatever they were doing before and were just staring her face the devil in kutte himself.

And she was all alone.

She couldn't just stand there, she needed to get out before the tears got out.

As she pushed her way past everyone, she could hear someone trying to stop her with "Lexi!", but she couldn't even look behind her to see who it had been. It didn't matter in the end anyways, Clay had already won that battle and she had been left there standing alone, lower than dirt.

She didn't even want to see Hap. What if Clay was right? Happy didn't even want to get married, he was _okay _with the idea just cause she wanted him to be okay with it. Neither did she want him to see her weak like that.

But apparently that was not up to her deciding, as a very familiar raspy "Lexi?" caught up with her rushed stride pretty soon. "Where are you going?"

"Anywhere. Away from here," she said through tears, pulling away the hand that he had used to make her stop and turn to face him.

"What the fuck happened?" he demanded, lifting her chin to examine her watery eyes.

"Nothing, just see you at home, okay?" she didn't want him to go inside and pick sides, cause even as she didn't want to admit it to herself, a voice inside her head kept on whispering 'what if he chooses him/his club?'.

"It's obviously not nothing, start talking."

The angry and demanding look on his face let her know that she was not getting out of there without explaining herself first.

"What do you think? Clay finally made his real opinion loud and clear and to be honest I bet he's not the only one who thinks that this is just a joke to you. Nothing you would actually go through with."

"Stay here," he turned around and started walking back inside. "I mean it, you better be here when I come back."

…

It didn't take all that long before he was back. Something in his stare was different, but she couldn't tell what.

"Let's go home," he gently pushed her forward.

"What he say?"

"It doesn't matter."

"Yeah it fucking does. Is there any truth to his words? Are you just saying this marriage stuff to please me, but don't actually believe in any of this to be true yourself? I kinda need to know that," she couldn't keep the waterworks from starting again.

"Geez, woman, why are you so emotional tonight? You should already know that I don't say shit I don't mean. If you want to get married tomorrow, then fine by me."

"Not tomorrow."

"Then when? Let's pick a date so you can stop trying to create a new ocean."

"Happy.. "

"Next month? 15th?" he asked again, ignoring her plea for him to stop.

"I…"

"Next month 15th it is then, if that does not suit you, then just say so," he said as if it was the usual way of deciding a wedding day.

"Can we just go home?" Lexi was exhausted and freaked out by everything. It was simply better to get home as quickly as possible.

"Yeah," Happy nodded. He still had that weird look on his face that even his excellent poker face skills couldn't really mask. He was for sure hiding something and Lexi couldn't tell how, but she simply knew it had everything to do with the chat he had had with Clay.

And nothing related to Clay ever meant good.

* * *

Thank you very much for reading! Hope you enjoyed it.


	35. The day has come, the day has gone

Disclaimer: I own nothing that you recognize.

"What did he say to you?" Lexi asked as they were walking side by side to the front door.

The air felt colder than usual. Or maybe it was just her insides that were strangely freezing. As they finally reached the door and the sound of their steps faded away, it got painfully quiet.

"It doesn't matter." He dropped his keys on the cupboard once they got inside and quickly moved out of her sight into the kitchen. Just like that, Lexi felt another wave of coldness float through her already shaking body. She wanted to follow him, but the fear of what he would eventually say made her stay put.

So much, in fact, that when Happy appeared again, holding two bottles of beer in his left hand, he actually cocked an eyebrow at her halted form, still standing right by the front door.

"Planning on going somewhere?" he asked mockingly, holding one of the bottles out to her.

"Um… no. I was just… Thanks," she reluctantly took the bottle, only to set it on the cupboard, next to his keys.

His eyes followed the bottle, before returning back to hers. They just stared at it each other for a moment, before he finally sighed. "Now listen to me. Nothing besides you and me matters, just like I've told you so many times before. I'm running out of ideas of how to prove this to you."

Well she had a few. All related to them two getting far-far away from Clay. But that was not an option. She knew better than to try to yank him away from the club, cause in the end it probably would have been like trying to skin him alive and promise that he'd look just the same and wouldn't feel a thing. Nope. She was not even going to try to go down that rabbit hole.

And after all, he was trying to assure her. And mostly she really did believe in his words.

"I'm sorry. You know I do trust you, it's just… I hate _him. _I really-really hate him. He just has to ruin everything. It's like his favorite pastime," she raised the back of her hand just in time to wipe away the single fallen tear.

"Look at me," Happy took a step closer. Putting down his own beer, he gently lifted Lexi's chin to force her into doing as he said.

He looked like he was about to say something, but then changed his mind. Instead he simply moved his head closer, until their foreheads met, and let out yet another sigh.

A moment later he backed away, only his hands remained on Lexi's shoulders. "I hate seeing you like this."

"You and me both… and I also hate feeling like this."

Happy stood frozen for a second, his mind by the looks of it going one hundred thousand miles a minute. "It will all be fine," he eventually said.

Somehow it felt like he wasn't just reassuring her anymore.

She nodded, giving him a weak smile.

As he was just about to let go of her, she shot out her own hands, to keep his in place. "Hold me."

She didn't have to say that twice. He pulled her closer, until their bodies were flush against each other. "Wanna go to bed?" he asked, his mouth moving against her hair.

"I do."

"I think I actually like the sound of that sentence," he said, picking her up bridal-style.

…

It took about twenty hectic and thoroughly tiring days to get everything ready. Actually it was amazing how they managed to do it all so quick. It was also amazing that she, against all odds, hadn't turned into a bridezilla… but then again Gemma had, so that was like a win some-lose some situation. Forcefully she had taken the charge and somehow Lexi actually felt relief. The decisions part alone made an atomic bomb blow up in her head at least twice a day. Happy had said it from the very beginning, he didn't give a fuck about flowers and shit as long as the wedding night was going to be just the two of them, naked. It was more or less the exact quote.

She didn't disagree on the last part, though, but still making her decide absolutely everything else was a bit of a heavy burden, so really, thank the almighty for Gemma and her incessant meddling.

Now that the weight of that had been more or less lifted, she was finally able to think about what she really wanted from _the _day. And apparently what she was dreaming of was a simple, sweet and traditional- meaning no seeing the bride before the right time kind of stuff- ceremony. Nothing big, nothing fancy.

"I was thinking…" she started, spreading lotion over her legs. "That if it's okay with you, I'd like us to do this properly."

The slight confusion in his face was almost adorable.

"I mean tomorrow, no seeing the bride before the wedding and such. I'll get ready at Gemma's and you'll have the house all to yourself. So whack off to porn and cry about losing your freedom, or whatever else it is that guys who're about get married do."

The last part made him snicker a little. "Yeah, sure," he simply shook his shoulders.

"Well, that was easy," she smiled, although she had mostly expected him to agree.

"Can't really say 'no' to that face now, can I?" he smirked, pulling her into his lap, by that making her straddle him.

"Good. I'll keep that in mind."

It felt so good to just be with him. Have his lips on hers and feel like that was all she needed in life. No air. No water. No nothing. Just him.

"You know, tomorrow will be a busy day," she said, her lips grazing his. "A well scheduled person would tell you that it's sometimes good to start tomorrows work the night before."

"Oh yeah?" he grinned, feeling her hand move down his chest and soon stroke him through his pants.

"I actually don't know, if that's exactly what Tara had in mind when saying that, but I feel like this situation fits the description as well." Lexi wiggled herself further away, until she was facing his growing member.

"Who am I to argue," he smirked as her fingers soon closed around him.

She then pushed her hair to one side and bent down to take him in her mouth, painfully slow.

…

"You look amazing," Gemma commented as Lexi finally stood up, the white silky, yet also modestly fluffy, material flowed smoothly around her.

She had to bit her lip, to avoid crying. It didn't help, though. She didn't need a fortune teller to know that her make-up was about to get ruined. Sorry, Lyla.

"You really do," Tara nodded with an unmistakably sincere smile growing on her approving face.

"Thank you all for being here with me. I can't tell you how much this means to me."

"Stop that, baby, you're going to end up looking like a someone who doesn't own a mirror, " Gemma said, reaching out to wipe her cheek. Since when was she such a crybaby anyways? Gemma was right, this was not the day to let it rain from her eyes, this day was reserved for smiles only.

"I know," Lexi let out as short laugh, well knowing that her sudden mood swings might have made her look more or less out of her mind.

"Lyla, do you think you could?" Lexi motioned at her face in what could have only been described an adorable cry for help.

"Already at it," she said, gently tugging Lexi to make her sit back down.

Lexi closed her eyes as Lyla worked on her upper eyeliner. It was a beautiful day. Everything was going according to the plans. Plans, which by the way would have felt like a stupid joke just a few short months earlier. Oh, yes, she'd come a long way with Hap. A really long way, in a really short time.

At this moment in time, there was nothing she wished to be undone. Sometimes a few (or more than a few) wrongs eventually made a right, apparently. Although then again, in the back of her mind, she was secretly a bit sad about not having his father, no matter who he had been, there to walk her down the aisle.

Then again, without him and Clay and all the shit that filled the space between those two sources of ultimate destruction, she probably would have never even met Happy. Thinking about it like that, maybe she should actually try to thank Clay for his unintentional matchmaking skills the next time she sees him… and then probably also watch the world burn right after that.

"Is Clay coming to the wedding?" Lexi asked, as she suddenly realized he wasn't at home, neither had Gemma even barely mentioned him. It was just them, girls and birds.

"Yeah, I think so," there was a slight doubt in Gemma's voice, but all in all she seemed quite confident in her words.

Not that it matter anyways, whether he was there or not. Actually Lexi kinda wished he wasn't, even as he had laid low on the subject for the past few days. He wasn't happy about it, no questions there, but eventually he simply seemed to accept it as an unfortunate circumstance he had no influence over.

It must have been a hard blow to his ego, though. Tragic, really.

"Are we ready to go?" Tara asked, her eyes glued to the screen of her phone. "Don't want to scare Happy off with the idea of a runaway bride."

"You can't run away from Happy. Believe me, I have tried. Multiple times," Lexi smiled, reliving all those time all at once.

The grin on her face must have said more than she intended, as the looks that were passed between others said just as much.

"Oh c'mon, guys. I'm not saying… Ah whatever. Can we just go now?" she chuckled, carefully standing up.

"Sure," Gemma said in a mocking tone.

As Lexi took the final steps before the front door, her mind went still. Was she really doing this? Actually getting married? The knots of nerves in her belly made her clasp a hand over her mouth. She was going to be sick. Literally.

"What's wrong?" Tara was the first to react.

Lucky for her, the nausea didn't stick for long. "I don't know. I thought I was going to throw up. Must be the nerves?"

Gemma eyed her suspiciously. "You sure it's just the nerves? What about the emotional rollercoaster we have witnessed during these past few days?"

"Are you asking me if I'm pregnant?"

"Well, are you?"

"No," she said in an instant, "well at least I don't thinks so. God damn it, could I be? Fuck, this is not something I want to worry about at the moment."

"Just take the test. The not-knowing would only distract you, I know from an experience. I think I have one in my medical kit, I'll be right back," Tara was already out the door, leaving Lexi stare blankly at the door swinging shut behind her. Gemma was staring at the door as well, but in a slightly different manner.

Did she actually want to know? No. But could she pretend everything was not okay, if she didn't? Also a definite 'no'.

"Okay," she said with a buff of air.

…

"I think we should really get going. The times not up yet, but I just don't want to have Hap think I'm not coming or something like that. I can look at this stupid stick on the way there.. or later."

"Are you sure?" Tara seemed hesitant to move, but it was Lexi's turn to be already out the door mid-conversation.

"Do I have to drive myself in this wedding cake of a dress?" they heard Lexi shout from outside.

"I actually would like to see her try," Lyla commented, closing the door behind her.

…

While in the backseat and pretending to look at her phone from the ridiculously small bag she had taken along just to leave it in the car once they got to their destination, she secretly decided to take a look at the pregnancy test. It was just like ripping off the bandage, it had to be done quickly.

Whatever it said, she actually didn't want anyone else inside that car to know. It was a scary and earthshattering news that was meant to be shared first with Happy and no-one else. And maybe there wasn't even anything to share. But still, one way or another, she didn't want to share the moment of truth with Gemma, Tara and Lyla.

Holding her breath, she discreetly took a look inside the bag.

_Not pregnant._

She closed her eyes for a moment and then looked at it again.

It said the same, there wasn't a little Happy growing in her belly. Somehow she wasn't as happy as she had expected by the revelation, but still she knew it was better this way, at least for now. It would have only complicated their crazy lives.

Lexi let out the breath she had been holding and glanced out of the window. The greenery of their surroundings was blinding. In fact, you could even say blindingly beautiful.

As they finally reached the end of the massive collection of Harleys, Lexi literally couldn't make the smile from her lips disappear. She was simply too fucking happy to care about the fact that Clay, along with Tig, was the first one to greet them at their arrival, or the fact that he actually gave her a kiss on the cheek and a hug.

It lingered a bit longer than she would have liked, so instead of looking at his shoulder, Lexi darted her eyes over his back to Tig who was telling Gemma something rather rapidly… and his eyes kept on bouncing her way.

She excused herself out of Clay's grasp and took a step closer to the suspicious duo.

"What, Tiggy, no comments on our dying affair?" Lexi smirked, but weirdly got nothing from him in return.

She raised a questioning eyebrow, as Gemma's hand found its way to her shoulder.

"Do you wanna go inside, have a drink or something to take the edge off, honey?" she asked, a weird look in her eyes.

"No, what's wrong?" Lexi demanded, knowing there was something hanging above her carefree head.

"We have to tell her, Gem," Tig said, avoiding Lexi's glare.

"Tell me what?"

"No, it's nothing. Just a matter of time before…" Gemma started, but was interrupted.

"Before what? I swear to God if you two don't start telling me what's wrong I'll…"

"Baby, I'm sure it's nothing, he's just a bit late," Gemma tried to smile.

"What do you mean? He's not here yet? Where is he?" Lexi shot out the questions like bullets.

"Lexi…" It was Tig, who tried to calm her down this time, but it was useless, at the moment Lexi couldn't even translate the word calm.

"No, I don't get it. Why is he not here? Did something happen to him?"

Could he have been in an accident? Did someone jump him while on his way here? Lexi felt her chest start to rise and fall in uneven intervals just from the thought of him being hurt, if not even worse.

"I don't know," Tig said with a sympathetic look that did not belong on his face.

"Has anyone tried reaching him? Why are you all just sitting around? He could be hurt," Lexi was already walking to the car to retrieve her purse, along with her phone.

"There was no answer," Tig said from behind her back, but she didn't care. He was going to answer her, even if he was down on the floor, unable to move. She knew that much.

As she unlocked the screen there were no missed calls, only one message… from Happy.

"_I'm sorry."_

The phone fell from her hands. Suddenly it was clear.

He wasn't coming.

A hand touched her bare shoulder from behind, but she didn't care who it was or what the person wanted.

"No," she said in a whisper, moving her shoulder so that the heavy hand would go away.

Her chest itched from the inside. She brought her hand on it, to make the uncomfortable feeling disappear, but it only got worse. It was as if her heart was pulling on every blood vessel and by that making them dance around in the most uncoordinated manner.

Lexi tried to catch herself before she fell, but in the last minute she just let herself go. Just like he had. She let herself fall down on her knees, the white dress making a beautiful contrast with the blackish-blue gravel underneath her.

She heard the voices around her, but knew they had nothing to say.

It was a beautiful disaster. She was beautiful, the place was beautiful and the him not being there really was disastorous.

She wasn't crying, although the tears were there, they were waiting.

_I'm sorry._

"Can you take care of this?" she finally asked, not from anyone specifically. She guessed someone said yes, but even if they didn't, it simply had no importance whatsoever.

She then reached for the phone that against all logic had somehow stayed in one piece. The message was right there, but she didn't have to look at it ever again, it was now carved on her heart anyways, so she pressed 'delete'.

If only there was such a button to delete _him _from her mind as well..

Ignoring whatever else went on around her, she called herself a cab and using the car as a source of balance helped herself up.

"I'll take you wherever you wanna go," Tara's voice said from behind her, but she simply shook her head as an answer.

"Alone," she said, not having the strength to form a real sentence.

_I'm sorry._

It wasn't even his fault. Why was he sorry? After all she had pushed him into this, full well knowing he didn't want it. Full well knowing they weren't meant to be.

She must have been staring at the ground for what felt like hours, before a sound of a car made her raise her eyes. Without a word, she took her bag and phone, and sat inside. "Please. Go."

Suddenly there was nothing left to hold on to. Her heart was shattered and her mind numb from pain… the first tear fell on her lap. Afraid of her not being able to stop once she started, she quickly wiped it away.

_I'm sorry._

The cabdriver kept on glancing her way from the rearview mirror. "Miss, you haven't told me where to go."

"Miss?"

"What?" she asked, her voice unrecognizable. It felt just as broken as everything else inside her.

"Where to?"

"Oh…To the airport."

She thought about going by his place to clean out her things, but what if he was there? She didn't have it in her to go against that possibility. Besides those were all things she didn't want anymore anyways. They were all ruined with memories of him.

As they drove on, she finally broke down. It was embarrassing, but she couldn't hold it back any longer. It was over. She would never be with him again. Even if he'd come after her, it was already too late to go back. The love she had in her heart was bleeding too much for it to ever heal again. It was drowning her.

The cab driver was nice enough to ask her if she wanted fresh air or anything, to which she only sobbed a muffled 'no'.

As they reached the sign on Charming, her mind flashed back at everyone and everything that related to that small town. Everything besides _him. _

Surprisingly there was only one face that wouldn't eventually fade to the background- Clay. He and the seemingly indifferent look on his face as the cab drove off. Everything always led back to him. He was the source, he was the end. He was the cause of everything. He was the cause of the rage that suddenly overtook her like nothing she'd ever felt before.

It was rather obvious. Whatever he'd said, he had helped Happy into actually realizing the mistake he was planning on making. Or maybe he'd never really planned it anyways? Guess she would never know.

And overall, Clay won yet again.

There was no peace anymore, that was for sure. There was nothing keeping her safe anymore. That was the thought that made her decide for the airport- and whichever place she moved on from there. But now thinking about it, it was useless.

She had tried to simply run and it hadn't really worked before.

"You are either one step ahead, or one step underground," she said to herself.

She'd had this card in her back pocked since the beginning, but afraid of it blowing back on_… him_, she'd never really even considered it. Until now.

_I'm sorry._

She closed her eyes. It felt like someone had stamped those words on her eyeballs and they burned.

_I'm sorry. _

She was sorry, too.

She picked up her phone and while wiping her make-up smudged eyes to see, entered her mailbox.

'I need your help. Please contact me as soon as possible. Like your dad always says, adjust and adapt, I'm thinking of taking the first flight out to Hungary."

'Message sent'

Guess she had set down her destination. It wasn't in any way reasonable what she was doing, asking the devil for help, but without Ha... _him _besides her_, _she simply couldn't see another way out.

If only she was sleepwalking through it all…

* * *

I'm really afraid of your reaction…I think I have never been this scared of posting a chapter.

Try not to hate me and Hap for too long, we'll make it up to you in the future, I promise, but if you still feel the need to hate someone, then hate Clay.

To put it shortly, this unfortunate chain of events was a long way coming. It simply had to happen.

Hope you won't abandon me because of this! :D

I also hope you enjoyed this… at least the first part.

Until next time!

Lots of love to you all in the meanwhile!


	36. Out of the white and into the black

Disclaimer: I own nothing that you recognize.

* * *

People simply kept staring at her. Well… then again she couldn't exactly blame them. It probably wasn't an ordinary sight to see a girl in a white wedding dress storm through the airport all alone. Not to mention what her face must have looked like. To be honest she was glad she hadn't had the chance to see herself from a mirror. It might have started another round of waterworks, and she had already had real trouble with trying to end the first. Poor cabbie, though, at one moment it might have looked like she was literally running out of oxygen.

She went through her tiny purse to check out the only items she now owned. Thank god that she'd had the habit of stuffing her credit card along with her wherever she went. She also had a lip gloss, a compact power and her keys and phone.

With a wince she took out the keys and dropped them to the trashcan next to where she sat in the waiting room. No need for those.

After shortly fighting the urge to start crying again, she whisked out her phone. She'd felt it buzz before, but it would have been an understatement to just say she didn't give damn back then. Neither did she know.

It had 27 missed calls and around the same amount of messages. Frankly she didn't care about them either. Nor about whom they were from…

Okay it was an obvious lie, of course she wanted to know whether any of them were actually from Happy. But it was for her own good to not even let herself know. There was only so much a human heart and brain could take. And she'd already entered the 'way too much' zone.

Lexi raised her eyes from the cell. She knew it should have been thrown into the trash as well, but a part of her just kept holding on to it, so she simply shut it off and stashed it back inside her purse, securely hidden under the compact power.

Her next problem was getting something to wear. She entered a random woman's clothing shop and literally picked up the first items on her way.

"Could you please cut off the tags?" Lexi asked the girl who couldn't hide her pity, or maybe it was simply horror.

"Of course," she said, trying not to stare. It somehow made the situation even more awkward.

"Thanks," Lexi mumbled, picking up the clothes after she paid and hurried to the dressing room.

She had managed to choose almost normal clothes with her blind-shopping. Nothing really fit all that well, but at least she didn't also look like Bozo the Clown, which was good. The blue jeans she'd bought were slightly too long, but looked good besides that. Her black T-shirt was tight around the chest area, but not so much that she couldn't breathe. Her pumps were changed for a pair of boots. Finally she had also decided for a black leather jacket with a furry collar, it was going to be cold in Budapest this time of the year.

Now thinking about where she was planning on going, maybe she should have checked her mailbox one last time before shutting of her phone? Maybe there weren't even anybody there to go to?

It was a thought that made her head hurt. The idea of flying there was her only option. She needed to get away… and she needed the protection only her get-away destination offered.

Letting out a heavy breath, she now looked at herself from the mirror, "They will be there."

She looked awful. Her eyes were swollen and red from all that crying, and even if she tried, she couldn't conjure a smile. It was as if that specific ability had left her facial expressions arsenal. Not that she was planning on smiling any time soon anyways.

Her gaze shifted away from her face and down to the marble floor. There was this white ball of fabric lying around her.

Throwing the golden chain of her purse over her shoulder, Lexi bent down to gather the dress into her hands. It made her heart ache and her mind numb yet again.

"Can you please throw this away?" she asked a different girl who seemed to work there on her way through the aisle.

"Um… you sure?" she raised her eyebrows looking at the dress Lexi was trying to force into her arms.

"Yes."

That was like the only thing at the moment she was sure about. No doubts about it, she was never-ever going to need another white wedding dress again… especially not this one. It was just as ruined as she was. One could even say cursed.

The girl nodded, visibly uncomfortable.

"Thank you," Lexi said, as she finally got rid of the burden and walked out the shop's doors. Though, getting rid of it didn't really change the way she felt. But on the other hand, it did keep the wondering eyes more or less away from her.

Her next stop was getting the plane ticket. It wasn't as easy as she had hoped. There were no straight flights anytime soon, so she chose for a way through England.

"I'll take the first one," she had insisted.

…

Once on the plane the heaviness in her heart stared to take over yet again. As much as she tried, she couldn't hold the traitorous tears from falling down on her lap.

To make things even worse, she suddenly got a glimpse of what had totally been wiped from her thoughts before.

That damn tattoo on her wrist. The way it smiled at her. The way it reminded of _him. _

It was there, crystal clear and coming closer to her eyes as she raised her hand to wipe her cheek.

"Perfect," she snorted out loud, followed by a short chuckle, followed by a long sniffle.

Apparently sometimes you're so messed up you don't even have a clue.

The person next to her suddenly moved in his seat.

"Rough day?" he asked in a strangely melodic voice.

"Rough life," Lexi muttered, not paying any attention to what the man besides her looked like.

"I get that. Care for a drink?" he then asked, the English accent heavy in his speech.

With an audible snort, Lexi finally turned her face to attach the marvelous voice to an actual person. "I don't _care _about or for anything, anymore, so no."

"Harsh," he smirked, something dark and twisted forming in his eyes. Something she could relate to. "Although I've come to think that people who say they don't care usually care the most."

"Well then you can continue pondering over it and in the meanwhile leave me alone," she turned her head back into staring the backside of the seat in front of her and by that ending their short and agitating conversation.

He laughed a bit, but fortunately remained quiet till the end of their flight.

It wasn't until they were off the plane that he simply without a single word caught up with Lexi and grabbed her hand in his. "Whenever in need," he placed a business card into her palm.

Lexi eyed the paper in her hands, as the dark and handsome man disappeared back to the crowd. She couldn't pin-point how exactly, but it managed to reek of arrogance and power.

She stopped by the trashcan to throw it away, as it had become the theme of the day, but somehow in the very last minute bent down to pick it up again.

_Just in case. _

…

After the second flight, she had run out of time to _not_ check her e-mail. It could have been described as incredibly stupid to take such a long trip without any insurance on the fact that she actually had someone there to meet, but threading the idea of this option blowing up in her face as well made her elongate the inevitable.

However, the time had run up just about now. And the inevitable moment of truth was here.

She took out her cell and while ignoring the missed calls and messages, connected her phone to the free wifi and logged in.

With a short sigh of relief, Lexi noticed there actually was one new e-mail.

Then again, what if it was from someone from Charming? Had they not thought about this idea after she'd so obviously ignored their calls and messages?

One way or another, she was forced to at least see who the letter was from.

She closed her eyes, klicking on the inbox. _Please. _

_Inbox (1)_

_From: _

_Polly Zobelle_

* * *

Guess who Gemma didn't kill? Guess who managed to get away to Budapest with her father?

I bet you're dying to read about Happy, but we'll get there real soon. I just need a bit more time for that and thought I'd in the meanwhile give you this filler-chapter.

I also wanted to thank you all for leaving me those wonderful comments. I so glad and relieved most of you were actually intrigued by the change of events and didn't simply hate it. :D

So again THANK YOU for reading!

You're all very much awesome!


	37. I hear the voice of rage and ruin

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of original storylines and characters, or anything else that you might recognize.

* * *

It had taken no more, and no less, than three days to plan it all. Okay, maybe the thinking part of the whole process started a bit earlier, but the 'getting everything/ everyone ready' part was done quite quickly. And as it turned out, rather unexpectedly, coming up with the money hadn't been the hardest thing. Waiting for the results was.

Results that were already starting to unfold before his eyes, just as he watched the cab drive off.

To be precise, then by results he meant knowing that every last bit of his elaborate plan had worked out accordingly and the heavy cash flow was now surely in the horizon. Actually money was what it was all really about from the very start. The little fact that Clay simply couldn't stand the thought of Lexi, and in association of his father, wasn't even the main thing that made him really dive into the madness of his plan. The much bigger reason was the drug deal he had yet to break down to the club, but what had already been secretly paying off to him big time… like really BIG time.

But exactly because he knew that there was no way the club was simply going to go with it, he had to make sure there were certain factors in motion helping to push the others down that road. Yeah sure, it was risky, he knew that too, but in the end it was much more beneficial than dangerous. So basically they were going to see that this way at some point too anyways, so he was simply giving them an incentive to get with the program of definite success. He was being generous, if anything.

And as it had turned out in the process, he had managed to work out an incentive that was capable of killing two birds with one stone- he was getting the trafficking deal, as well as finally going to get rid of that Weston bitch.

It was quite amazing how everything had formed into a perfect circle of motion so easily. For Clay to get rid of Lexi, he needed money, lots of it, and for those mountains of sweet-sweet greenery to keep on coming into his pockets, he simply needed to make sure that the eyes and ears around the club, that could never be truly trusted, were finally going to cease to be a problem.

The most difficult thing was actually hiding it all from Gemma. Somehow she had a crazy witchy ability to sense whenever he was up to something. He could see it from the way she was looking at him at times, as if trying to read his mind. But try as she may, this elaborate scheme was going to be that one stone left unturned even by her.

The other slight difficulty arouse with the fact that there was no insurance in predicting how people involved would eventually behave. So that meant having back-up plans with back-up plans. And yet it was still constantly close to blowing up in his face. He knew that. But it didn't matter.

His obsession to get it over with had grown so impatient that at one point he had simply accepted the riskiness of his actions and decided to just go with it, no matter what. Besides, some might even say decisions like that were what made one powerful. And damn sure, he was powerful. And in no way was some little annoying tart going to keep making him look over his shoulder forever, or his club's fear of uncertainty from ensuring him and Gemma a nice life for the rest of their days.

Besides, in the end of the day, it was simply meant to go down this way from the very start.

So basically it was all about connecting the right dots. About making it all fall into one fluid line of lies, lies that created their own stories, and altogether by that letting loose something that couldn't be tamed, nor repaired- just like _he _intended.

**Three days before the wedding.**

"Romeo," Clay greeted the man coming out from the black van, Luis following close behind him.

"Still alone, _esse, _isn't the MC brotherhood all about staying close-knit?" Romeo smiled, but the wondering, or perhaps even warning, behind his message was loud and clear.

"I ain't gonna lie to you. There's an internal fire that needs to be put out before I can bring them all in." It was a dangerous road Clay was walking on, but sure enough a guy like Romeo would nonetheless have seen through any other kind of bullshit he might have tried to pass out as the truth.

"And how close are you to completing the task?" It was Luis who asked, his eyes searching Clay's face, obviously judging the trueness of his words.

"Close. Just need a few fairly expensive fire extinguishers to put the flames to rest completely," Clay said with sly grin.

"Sounds like a noble quest you've got there, pres. Too bad _we_ don't specialize in charity business," Luis replayed in an instant.

"Who's talking about charity? Just a little advance to get the waters flowing," Clay took a long drag from his cigar. It was bold move, but it was also now or never. In no way was he coming up with the necessary money without the cartels help. Besides to them it wasn't even a loan, more like an investment in the future of their mutually beneficial business deal.

Still by instinct, Luis seemed to be the one more against giving him the money. That much was Clay able to translate into English from the heated and hushed conversation going on not that far away from him.

"Fine, we'll help you out," Romeo finally nodded, turning back to face him, "though, I really do suggest you get it done sooner, rather than later."

"Certainly, but there's also another thing. I need a helping hand. Preferably someone with experience in the field of helping to clean different kinds of messes. An outsider." Clay knew he was dancing on the line of boundaries, but he really did need that certain outsider to make sure his plan would carry through no matter what... and who else knew people like that better than they.

"I might know a guy or two to fit the description, but the friendly reference from us will cost an extra."

"Of course," Clay held out his hand to Romeo. He shook it with a dangerous smile on his face.

Maybe Clay was digging his own grave here, or then again maybe he was winning a lottery ticket. There was no way to be sure of either one, so he chose to believe the second.

"Here," Luis held out a phone that looked like it was from another decade, "you will be contacted tomorrow."

"Perfect."

It really was perfect. Everything had gone down the way it was supposed to and now that he had the starting point for plan L, he had the free hands to work on plan H for a while.

…

**Two days before the wedding**

"Where're you off to again?" Gemma demanded, her voice coming from the office.

"Club stuff. See you later?" he stopped by the door, trying to act as nonchalant as ever.

"Yeah," Gemma rose to give him a quick peck on the lips.

"Love you," he murmured, roughly pulling her closer.

"Love you, too," Gemma smirked, "oh and hey you do know that Lexi's getting ready at our place on Saturday?"

"Yeah, I think you mentioned," Clay let go of her and took a step back. "And yes, I promise I'll be out of your hair," he chuckled raising his hands up in surrender.

"Not exactly what I meant by it, but yeah, I guess that works too."

He gave her another kiss, before continuing on his quest of setting up plan H. He wasn't a fool, thinking he could simply kill of Lexi without all fingers pointing at him. Nor was he an idiot to believe in his ability to simply mess up their lives and walk away with a perfect alibi.

He'd learnt it a long time ago. Maybe it was even passed down to him from his father?

The idea was actually quite simple- for one to not get blamed for a certain something, one has to make sure he already _is _blamed for something else. Rarely does anyone bother to double-check once someone already voluntarily declares himself guilty.

At least that was how it was bound to work out according to his plans. So basically he was going to make sure that in the very end he did end up as the bad guy, but only on his own well thought-through terms.

Which all brought him to the second part of his scheme- the Chinese. Lexi didn't have to necessarily die, she simply had to go away forever. Although not knowing how she or Happy or anyone else would react to anything, the killing her plan was waiting for a go-sign as well, just in case.

But still Clay was first going to try to work out a way through which neither one of the almost wedded couple would even try to save what had been doomed from the very start, in other words a plan that would let her live.

After and half an hour drive, Clay finally met up with the Chinese. Besides getting the money and the outsider from the cartel, making a deal with the Chinese was the other crucial part of his scheme.

"Clay," Henry greeted, "I have to say I was surprised to get your message."

"What can I say, I'm an unpredictable man," Clay grinned, letting Henry lead him inside.

"Care for a drink?" the man asked, sitting down in the corner-booth, well separated from everyone else's hearing reach.

"Neh, let's get straight to business," Clay said.

"So all _this_ is about business. Safe to say I'm intrigued," Lin motion between the two of them.

"Oh you should be. This is good," Clay grinned, trying to keep the mood light.

"Well… let's hear it then. I also assume there's a reason it's just you here?"

"I'll get to that. The most important thing you need to know is that I'm here to offer you a _very _profitable deal. But first I'll need your help in making it all happen."

"Do continue," Henry leaned forward, smile on his face.

"What I'm offering to you is a way to flush out the black completely, split what's theirs with the brown. Sons will traffic a hefty piece of Galindo's blow with a nice price straight to you to deal out in Niners turf," Clay laid it all out in one breath.

"And what's in it for you?"

"All in all I'll win from the deal just like you. But to get it started in the first place, and in return for letting you get a piece of this pie, I need your help in creating an incentive for my guys to vote for the trafficking."

Henry took a moment to think, before leaning back on his chair. "Afraid of getting their hands white?"

"You might say so…" He didn't need to lie about that, it was obvious why relations with a drug cartel would make people anxious, or even straight out scared.

"And where do I fit in exactly?"

"Not specifically you, but your crew. I need you to kidnap two of my guys, VP and the enforcer, on this Saturday. Hold them in captivity for a short while until I push the deal through with the others." _And get rid of Lexi in the process. _

"Why them? They the ones most against it?"

"No.. well, maybe. None of them actually knows shit about the whole thing at the moment. But to answer your question, then those two are the ones to take because one is getting married and the other is his best man. I think it will make a nice statement of how serious you guys are about vows and promises."

"Hmm… yet there's still this one hole in your idea. How exactly does me taking two of your guys help you with getting the others to back you up on the drug deal? And even further, it will totally fuck up the relations between your club and my crew, can't really picture Jax dropping off coke after we take him at gunpoint."

"Well, that's where I come in. Actually that's the whole reason you're involved specifically. I'll tell the club that I'm solely responsible for your actions. I'll tell them that I promised you the deal without their consent and then tried to back out, so you were basically forced to take Jax and Hap to make me keep my promise… which I of course gladly will, once everything has been worked out. So basically I'll apologize for getting the club into such a bad situation, while also making them see the profit everyone will get from it in the end. Then they'll vote for the deal and we will bring you the first shipment, in exchange for Galindo's money and our guys," Clay explained, "So as you see we'll all win from it. I just need some help in making everyone see that."

"Okay, I'll have to get back to you about it. But if it where only my decision, I think I'd be in."

"Great, but it's quite urgent. The kidnapping needs to happen on Saturday morning, right before the wedding. Also do me a favor and if you have them, send a message from Happy's phone to the unfortunate bride, something like 'Sorry' or I don't know," Clay shrugged, "I'll let you know when the time is right to send it, I think it would be best for the whole kidnapping thing to come out at the very last minute, will have everyone more on edge."

"Yeah, I guess… but if we make it look like your guy simply ditched the bitch, then how will your guys get the needed push by knowing we have them?"

"That will be the surprise part, of course. We'll let the thing set for an hour or so, make it feel real at first. Then after some time I will, or someone else will, notice that VP ain't reachable as well, which will be just around the right time for you to contact me, letting me know your terms for releasing them," Clay explained.

As he spoke, the wheels kept turning in his head. How much about Lexi's involvement did he have to explain to him? Should he even pay attention to the poor bride left at the altar at all, or was it okay to let that part of the story just sit on the sideline. As if it was an unfortunate side-effect, unworthy of their attention? Or would it instead exactly be the very something in Lin's head that could possibly make him doubt about his plans and overall intentions?

Better safe than sorry, he then added, "Well yeah, there also the bride, poor thing. It will suck for her for the time being, but once it's done she'll know the 'truth' they will all know. I just think it would make it more real if you guys toy with the club at first."

"Perhaps. But what if they still won't vote for the deal, even with all that hassle? What then?"

"They will," Clay said in stern manner.

"Can you really be that sure? What if they demand for a retaliation instead? What then? You'll hail your other charters here and come punching down my doors?"

"It will not come to that. In the end I'm the president of the fucking mother charter. No such vote will ever go by. For crying out loud, in that scenario I'd be just as much under the fire as you would be, as I'm pretty sure you'd be loud and clear about how and why you ended up with taking our guys in the first place."

"Oh yeah, that's true," Lin chuckled, "and do continue keeping that in mind, cause if this all would go to hell, which would be an actual possibility, you for sure wouldn't be coming out of it unscratched, that much _I _can promise," he smirked. "It is a god damn bold, yet risky, move, Morrow, I do hope you are really up for it. And even more so, I really hope you can handle it, if we do agree to play along that is."

"None of my guys will choose for a war with you, if there's a better option. Which there is and which I will shove down their throats with force, if it by some chance would come to that point.

"Okay. Let's imagine that we do play ball, and everything works out on your end… Is there something else I should know?"

"Absolutely not."

Henry cracked a smile.

"The promises and deals you make…" Lin shook his head with a grin. "You know sometime plans that are worked out to the core have their own weaknesses."

"I'm not planning on finding out what they are. It will all work. I'll make it work."

"If you are so sure… still I'll have to let you know about our decision. I, unlike you, do think it's best to not take the weight of decision-making in such matter solely to myself."

"To each his own," Clay smirked, knowing he'd already gotten his agreement, even if he wanted to make it look like he was still deciding.

Besides possible retaliation from Sons, if things went south somehow, what else was there for Lin to lose? And in reality, Sons would not retaliate, he handn't been lying while promising that this will never happen, as it would be a retaliation against him just as much… and that he simply could not allow to happen.

"Just remember, there are no losers in this game, only winners," Clay said, standing up. Though, mentally he had to add '_Besides Lexi'._

"Very well," Lin nodded, standing up as well.

"I'll be waiting for your call then," Clay held out his hand.

Henry nodded and shook the hand Clay was holding out. Even if Lin tried to play it cool, Clay could almost see the dollar sign shining back at him from his eyes…

… and just a few hours later, the call game.

With plan H, everything was from that point actually set in motion.

Which altogether only left him with finishing up with plan L.

…

By the end of the day he'd also got a call on the cell Luis had handed him, just like he had promised. The guy on the other end was strict about his pay, about what he was agreeing on doing, and mostly about demanding on his own identity to remain hidden from Clay as well. That's where the name he went by came from- Shadow. He did not simply work in shadows, he _was _a shadow.

"So when exactly will I know which route to go?" Shadow asked, his voice staying in that perfect indifferent tone that gave out no emotions.

"As soon as _she _makes her decisions. She either decides to go on her own terms and we work on with that, or we make her do that," Clay stood up from the head of the table and walked over to the chapel window. Peeking out from it, he could see Happy standing there, talking to Tig, totally oblivious to what was going to happen all too soon, and then again not soon enough.

"Okay, let's pretend she decides to stay, what do you want me to do with that _decision?"_

"If she won't run away after the message she's going to receive, then I'll somehow have someone take her home, away from the wedding mess. Let's just say this is the worst case scenario. However if it does happen, then she will have an accident of sorts, something I'm sure you're all too familiar with, something which simply erases her from the problem equation."

"Your phone is not traceable, neither is mine. Let's be clear about the job. If she doesn't take off on her own terms, then I'll kill her and make it look like an accident, yes?" Shadow asked on the other end of the line.

"Yes. But I doubt she'll wait for him, after she gets the message. In that case her death might not be necessary. I simply need her far away and out of our lives forever."

"So, let's say she's heartbroken and decides to disappear for a while. How do I fit in in making sure that she will not come back after some time?"

"Well, if she chooses the way that will not force my hands and make me order the kill, then I'm more than sure that my guy will personally hunt her down before she can even think twice about what had happened. So that's where you play in in that scenario. You will then act as a bounty hunter, a guy who will indeed hunt her down and then perhaps help perfect the truth a bit, for example by making the staying hurt part permanent for both of our never to be wedded couple. I don't care how you do it, I'm just going to need some kind of proof about her moving on with her life with some other asshole, or if you can't manage that then proof that she's dead, even if she really ain't. Either way it will kill off my guy's possible ideas on how to get her back, cause I might not know her, but I do know him, and even if he might want a payback, from which I'll talk him out of, he'll never fight for some bitch … and on her part… well for her to not come back haunting us, we'll use the same tactics. I'll personally work on that end."

"What about if she goes, but still chooses to stay too close for comfort?"

"Then I don't care how you'll do it, but you'll make her go those few necessary miles further."

"Sounds like a time-consuming task, you sure you can even afford it?"

"We wouldn't be talking if I weren't," Clay answered, sitting back down behind the desk. Everything was coming together perfectly, he simply refused to believe there was something big he wasn't seeing. And oh, how much he loved the feeling that came with a great plan coming together. He only wished he could savor it for later.

If there were any loop-holes, he was sure he'd get them all figured out before it all went down on Saturday.

"So. Do we have a deal?"

"Yes. Let me know which path to go when the time is right. Use this number, after that get rid of the phone . Our mutual friend will get you another one," Shadow replied.

"Oh wait, I also need you to get her phone as soon as possible. Don't want anyone else from here contacting her."

"Consider it done," Shadow answered, before ending the call without a warning.

* * *

First of all I really apologize for it taking so long and I do hope I managed to explain everything, without getting you too confused? If you did, then I hope the next chapter will help clear everything out.

I initially intended on getting Happy into this chapter as well, but it would have gotten way too long, and I didn't want to break it up in some weird place, so yeah... But don't worry, I have a little vacay coming, so the next chapter will be up real soon!

Last but not least, THANK YOU for the amazing feedback I've gotten throughout this story and as always THANK YOU SO MUCH for reading!

XX

(Oh btw who was the business guy on the plane? Was it Shadow? Maybe? Maybe not? Actually I haven't decided that yet … Initially it was, but now I'm starting to doubt. What do you think?)


	38. Birds of hell awaiting and hating

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of original storylines and characters, or anything else that you might recognize.

* * *

**Day of the wedding**

"You look like you need a drink," Jax commented, watching Happy go paler by the minute.

"Two," he sat down behind the kitchen table.

Jax smirked, pulled out a bottle of Jack, and placed it before him with two classes.

"Getting hitched… It ain't as bad as it sounds… I suppose," Jax moved to the other end of the table.

Happy raised his eyes for a second, but didn't answer. He was really struggling to keep calm. What the fuck had he gotten himself into? Marriage was so not for him.

He let out a groan, an unwilling one.

Jax only chuckled in response. Of course he found it amusing. All of them did. Especially Tig, who he could predict was soon going to suffer under a serious concussion, if he kept on bugging him about becoming a loving husband.

_Husband. _

He had really started to hate that word. It resembled too much with the idea of him being a hussy on a band.

Another involuntary move made his hand wipe across the table, in the process knocking over the half-full class of fiery liquid.

"Shit," Happy mumbled, looking at the mess that was nearly dripping down to the floor.

"Don't worry about it,"Jax reached for a towel and aimlessly threw it over the puddle.

"I'mma go have a smoke outside," Happy stood up abruptly, head spinning and in serious need of fresh air.

Jax might have mumbled something in agreement, but he couldn't even register what it was. He was in such a state of disorientation that maybe he himself was in need of a little concussion to snap him out of the haze he was currently living in.

He made it to the door, opened it up, and was physically pushed back in. He reached for his gun, but a "I'd rather you didn't", accompanied with a barrel aimed at his head, made him think twice.

His eyes moved from the gun to the holder, why the fuck were Chinese busting in on them?

"I need you two to come with me," Henry's voice sounded from behind the stupid asshole pointing a gun at his head. "Don't do anything stupid… and we won't have to do anything stupid to you."

"What the hell is this?" Jax demanded.

"All in good time. Let's go," Lin motioned to the door.

At gunpoint they were shoved into a black van. It was only then that he suddenly remember what day it was, and were he was supposed to be. _Lexi. _Did they have her too? Or others? The hell was this even all about? They had no beef with the Chinese, at least not to his knowledge. And Jax seemed to be thinking about the same thing. Only more vocally.

Lin made it look like he was surrounded by a soundproof cell, stupid motherfucker was so going to die for this.

After a short drive, they were escorted to some warehouse-like building. At this point, his expression must have been stone cold. All his nerves were gone, and in was the familiar buzz that came with trying to make it out alive from whatever mess he was in.

Only that there wasn't much to do as these fuckers had already shackled them up, taken their guns, knives and phones. He looked around for something else to use as weapon. His eyes made out the shape of a crowbar not that far away, but as they were under a constant supervision, and unable to move, getting to it was a slim chance.

"If you would tell us what it is that you want, we could perhaps come to some sort of an agreement," Jax's voice was uncharacteristically hesitant.

Lin, who had just entered the room, looked at both of them in turn with a smirk on his face, "Sure."

"I need you to reconsider your vote," he pulled a chair and sat in front of them.

"What vote?" Jax looked just as confused as Happy felt.

"The Galindo deal?" Lin raised an eyebrow. "You guys should know better than to make promises you do not intend to keep."

"What deal? What the hell are you talking about? We ain't even _in_ the drug business."

"You saying there was no vote? Actually it doesn't matter. What matters is that according to Clay that deal is in the makings, at least was, before he announced that you guys were backing out. And don't get me wrong, I do understand why you might think twice, but in the end, there simply ain't no backing out when things are promised and already in the motion."

Jax turned to look at Hap, his face contorted in anger, the same anger that was heating up Hap's blood. Fucking Clay.

"So why take us, why not come to the club in peace? We could have worked something out," Jax tried to force his voice calm.

"Could have? Oh we will, don't worry. I'm just helping you guys get to the _right_ solution a bit faster. I mean what it all comes down to is vows and promises, so I got to thinking that who else to make an example out of, than a groom and his best man, am I right?" Lin raised his hands in a manner as if it was all self-explanatory.

"Oh which reminds me, let's make them squirm a little more, why don't we," he said to them, before turning to his guys, "where's the crazy-looking one's phone?"

"I'm going to murder you. Slowly," Happy growled, looking at Lin typing something into his phone.

"Easy there. No need for threats, we're all friends here. I'm simply letting the bride know that you're sorry for not making it on time," Lin mumbled in an unaffected tone.

"You will regret that," Happy seethed through clenched teeth.

Fury didn't even begin to describe the state Hap's head was in. He'd never felt this furious before. It was one thing to fuck with him, the club… but to include _her. _He was personally going to make sure Lin's death would be excruciatingly painful.

„Anyways, guys, if you need anything, let them know. I have to head out for a moment," Lin pointed at his man. "I'm sure this will be settled soon enough, no need to work up grudges."

While Happy was busy killing all of them with his glare, Jax was literally choking on a short burst of laughter.

…

After what felt like a couple of hours, Lin was finally back, a grin stretching from ear to ear.

"Like I said, boys, we're all good now. The vote got passed in your absence. I'm sure we can put this little insanity behind us now… My guys will drop you off to the clubhouse … and just don't try anything, okay. Talk to Clay first," he looked down on them with visibly growing wary. By the end of his little speech, the grin he had entered the room with was non-existent.

Happy could instantly tell that Lin had lost half of his confidence as soon as he saw that neither he nor Jax seemed to be okay with any of this. As if anyone could be okay with being kidnapped right before his wedding.

_Shit_. Poor Lexi was probably worried as hell. He already hated himself for having put her through all that had happened in the past, and now this.

However, letting it all set for a moment, he decided not to start thinking about the ways to make it up to her, instead he simply wanted to hold her in his arms and never let go.

All the doubts he'd had before the wedding. They meant nothing to him now. He knew what he really wanted in this crazy life of his, especially _who_ he wanted.

…

**Next day in Hungary**

Taking her first steps off the plane, feeling just as if she was taking her first steps as a living being in general, she couldn't break through the part of her brain that kept on insisting that it was all just a bad dream.

However, as badly she might have wanted it to be true, she knew it wasn't. It was as real as all those people striding past her, talking in a manner that all together sounded like an angry hornet's nest.

"Exit… Where the fuck is that god damn exit," she mumbled, far too loudly for a person standing in the middle of a crowded room all alone.

A few sets of eyes might have gazed upon her, but she did not care.. so what if she was the foreign weirdo.

Polly had promised to pick her up from the airport, but as she was still somewhat far away from it, it left Lexi with an hour and a half to kill all by herself.

Sadly though, she'd been locked up inside her head, mentally reliving all the shit that had ever happened to her, much too long for it to be healthy. Since the moment she'd sat down in that cab, broken and beaten, she'd wanted to be left alone. But now that every though about Charming and the people in that horrible little town had started bringing her to the edge of actually puking her guts out, she realized the error in holding all that sorrow deep inside. Having it all bottled up… In the end it was simply making her even sicker than she already felt. She knew she needed to let at least some of it out, before her head blew up, and preferably to someone she could actually trust.

However, as she had literally reached that sad state in life, where she had no-one who she could without any doubt trust, she was forced to be okay with the second option- having to turn to the people she'd buried, along with all the memories of her father, to the depths of her mind.

It wasn't fun to dig all that shit back up, but it was necessary. She just knew that she couldn't go through this hell all alone. She wouldn't find her way out, without directions and a little help.

So she had turned to the devil himself. Well actually to the devils spawn. Polly… Lexi had always known that she was way more daddy's little girl than she'd ever even pretended to be. Polly, unlike her, had also always understood _the mission, _ even if she didn't know it back then to be a real mission, she still never had a problem with casting dirty glances toward people with different skin color. It was just the code she was taught, it was the way of life for her. But unlike Polly, they could never make Lexi a real believer.

However, despite all that, despite the fact that they had never agreed on the most basic notions about the world as such, they'd still become close at times.

Maybe it was because at those specific times they had no-one else, maybe because somehow they'd learned to shut their eyes when it came to differences in opinions? Whatever it was, it had somehow made Polly the person she chose to reach out to in the time of need.

Or maybe she chose to reach out to her and her father, because she wanted to make Charming pay.

"Lexi?" a hesitant voice reached her ears.

She turned around, looking at the blond-haired girl walk up to her in a rushed manner.

"Hi," Lexi gulped, feeling relief wash over her.

"Hm.. that's different," her eyes loomed over her red locks.

"Long story," Lexi shook her head, not wanting to get into details just yet.

"That I could guess… You look like shit."

"Thanks, I also _feel _vibrant like a fucking rainbow."

"I've missed you," she grinned.

Lexi could tell that she was sincere. At least about that.

"Thank you for meeting me," she tried to return the smile, but it was quite a painful attempt.

"How could I not. You'd do it for me."

She had no answer to that. Would she have done it if the roles were switched? Or would she have turned her back to her, being all caught up with the Sons and their hatred for the League and what they'd done to Gemma. Not that she now thought that any of that was right… hell no. But she simply wasn't in the positon to judge the only people in the world willing to help her without a question.

"Okay, but let's get you out of the cold. I mean you, my little vibrant as fuck rainbow, are starting to look a bit too blue."

"In my defense I did not know I was about to enter country that is situated inside a big-ass freezer."

"To be all honest, it was shocking to me too at first, and yet I even remembered living here when I was about four. You'll get used to it."

She nodded. There were lots of things for her to get used to.

"Oh, were you careful?" Polly suddenly asked, looking around them suspiciously.

"Huh? Careful with what?" Lexi raised her eyebrow.

"Coming here. Did someone try to follow you?"

"I.. I don't thinks so. I left in such a hurry."

"Okay. Still, we should drive around a bit, can't have anyone follow us."

"Right," Lexi nodded absentmindedly.

This fucking world just kept on spinning. Even far away from the States, she was still mixed with the same crowd, still having to worry about things that normal law-abiding people wouldn't even consider to be a possibility.

Was it ever going to end?

* * *

Took longer than expected, but I guess you're already used to it. Sorry!

Anyhow, hope you liked it.

Poor Hap doesn't even know the mess that awaits at home. Hope he's up for a tough fight, because we already know that Clay will give his best to keep them from getting back together. But then again perhaps he is underestimating them? We'll see!

Would really appreciate your thoughts on it!


	39. Fated, faithful or fatal?

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of original storylines and characters, or anything else that you might recognize.

* * *

She'd always figured it was her luck, or rather lack of luck, that incessantly kept on leading her into the depths of chaos, over and over again. Now she was slowly starting to come to the conclusion that perhaps it wasn't even about luck. Perhaps it was just that she was simply born out of it, out of chaos. It had always been there, closing in on her, one fucked up situation at a time. Maybe there was no running from it, no avoiding it. So why was she even trying?

"What's going on there?" Lexi's thoughts got torn to shreds as she watched people getting directed back from what must have been the exit.

"Have no idea," Polly looked around, mimicking her confusion.

The looks on other people's faces didn't say much either, as they too managed to give off the vibes of confusion and annoyance.

"Hey! Excuse me!" Polly tried to stop the uniform wearing guy trying to hurry his way through the ever growing crowd.

"Sorry, miss. Everything is okay, no need to worry. We're just running the security measures," he whirled by them, leaving both women gape at his back in even bigger confusion.

Security measures? What the hell was going on? Lexi's eyes moved across the room to the timetable. Apparently all flights had been cancelled or delayed. There was also something else written there… in Hungarian… Sure enough they weren't the only ones in that fricking international airport that did not speak the language? It made her want to head straight to personnel , kick down some doors and demand for a translation accompanied with an overall explanation about whatever the hell was going on.

However_, that_ was a difficult task to complete, as they were more or less blocked in by others still filling up the waiting area.

And as if it wasn't enough that they couldn't really even move a single muscle, other people were also getting restless, pushing and whining, and the room they were in was definitely not big enough for such gatherings. In fact, she couldn't even exactly blame the old lady stepping on her toes, there simply wasn't enough room on the floor for everyone to have a space of their own.

"Can it be something about the weather? A snowstorm perhaps?" Lexi tried to come up with an explanation.

"Doubt it. Seemed quite okay to me, when I came in," Polly shook her head.

A single bark pulled her attention.

"Look," Lexi motioned with her head toward the far end of the room. Polly had been right. It was definitely not about the weather, unless of course in Hungary stormy weather was something for the police to deal with. She somehow doubted that was the case. Especially once she noticed the dogs on leashes, sniffing out an invisible trail.

They watched on as people tried to clear the way for what must have been the lead to something criminal, with 'tried' being the word of the day.

"I bet it's drugs," Polly mouthed beside her.

Lexi nodded, having come to the same conclusion. Or a bomb. But had it been a bomb threat, people would have probably been escorted out of the building, instead of back into it, right?

Whatever it was, the dogs seemed to have found _it_ behind a vending machine.

After running a security control on everyone in there, the lockdown was eventually over. They never really found out what it was all about, but as it did not involve them in the end, it was okay by her.

Soon everything seemed to go back to business, as usual. Everyone seemed to be relieved. Except for Lexi. It was weird to admit it, but that little involuntary halt in her agenda, _it _had been a relief. She'd gotten a moment to think about something else, to actually wrap her head around someone else's problems, besides her own. It was something she hadn't even known she was missing.

Out of nowhere, Polly pulled her out of daydreaming about how fucking amazing it had felt to be only vaguely aware of her own shitty life, "I think we're good now. I must have done about two full circles around that block. If there's someone still on us, then my hat goes off to him, must be a mastermind."

"Must be," Lexi mumbled in response.

For a while, they drove in silence. Lexi loved the scenery around them, it was idyllic, it was peaceful. Strangely cold and grey, but still amazingly beautiful to her eyes.

However, in spite of all that, she just couldn't find it in her to _really _enjoy it. It wasn't a vacation, she couldn't even pretend for a second that it was.

"We'll be there soon," Polly's voice came out of the blue again, her eyes still on the road. She must have noticed her shifting around uncomfortably.

Though, it wasn't the drive to some secret hideout that made her uncomfortable. It was the wait for yet another chaos, for sure to ensue any moment now, which finally got to her. She stared out of the car window calculatingly, buried in deep thoughts. Maybe it was better to be prepared for what was to come, at least partially. Maybe there wasn't even anything coming from Charming, but then again maybe there was. Maybe _he _ had changed his mind, maybe _he _was trying to contact her. And a big maybe at that, but perhaps it was better to be at least aware of that little, yet important, piece of the equation, of course in case it even was thrown into the equation.

She also knew that _if _she was going to put her head into the lion's den at all like that, she needed to do it right away, or she would talk herself out of it. Plus in the depths of her mind she might have also realized that she might find it hard to concentrate on the meeting with Ethan, if she left her internal debate on checking her phone/throwing her phone away altogether set any longer than necessary.

So, with a silent wince, she reached for her purse. Her hand paused on it for what felt like centuries, before slowly opening it up and finally glancing inside. For a moment she just sat there, looking inside, and blinking.

How in the hell had she managed to lose her phone in such a short time? Or had she unconsciously already thrown it away?

No… she'd definitely used it to check her mail not that long ago… and then shoved it back in.

However, it wasn't there anymore, in other words also meaning that she had nothing to debate over after all.

There were equal parts of sorrow and relief running through her. A part of her really needed to know, and a part of her thanked the lords for not even having the possibility of knowing.

…

**Day before in Charming**

Lin's guys made sure to keep themselves away from him, and by that also away from harm's way, when they dropped them off to the clubhouse. Good for them, though, there was not an ounce of self-control left inside him. He was in a full ripper-mode.

Actually Happy didn't even quite know how to get it under control, before they were faced with Clay and the others. He simply knew he had to, because no matter what Clay had yet again managed to stir up, he was still his pres.

Soon enough the car started slowing down. He could see it through the dimmed windows, others were already outside of the clubhouse, waiting. As the door finally opened, he got a better look at who was there and who was not. Lexi wasn't… guess she'd gone inside for a moment.

"Church. NOW," Jax seethed right to Clay's face.

Clay nodded, throwing a quick glance over his shoulder.

As much as he too wanted to know all about the deal, he knew he needed to see Lexi first.

"Where's Lex?" Happy asked, from no-one in particular.

The silence that followed wasn't something he'd expected. And why the hell were they looking at him like that. Even Gemma looked scared. Though, in the end it was still the Queen B, who finally gathered up enough courage to answer, "Hap…"

"She mad?" he demanded impatiently, glancing toward the door.

"She is… gone," Gemma said, starting to reach her hand out to him, but then stopping it from actually landing on him.

"Gone where? She went home?" he questioned, looking around for his bike, and then remembering that it was still at Jax's.

"When she got the text, she thought you left her at the altar, so she took off, saying she wanted to be left alone. Couldn't really argue with her… I'm sorry Hap, we didn't know back then that you'd been taken. And that text…" Gemma said, speaking in what he recognized as her comforting voice.

"What it say? The text? What the fuck did it say?" he growled, fists ready to smash through someone's skull.

"It simply said you're sorry."

"Fuck," he ran his hands over his head in agony. This was bad. Fuck. Of course she thought he left her.

He turned around and started marching toward the tow-truck. He needed to go home, explain everything.

"Brother," it was Tig's voice coming from behind his back, "she's not there, we checked."

It wasn't Tig's fault, in the back of his mind somewhere he must have realized that, but as Tig had unfortunately opened up his big mouth, and was also the closest one to him at that moment, he was also the one getting pushed against the wall, now with a literal death look accentuating Happy's face, "how could you let her leave alone in the first place?"

"Calm down," came Clay's order. "We'll find her, Hap. Let's just go inside and make a plan, alright? You'll explain everything to her, and it will be fine."

As much as he was dying to kill Clay for saying things were going to be just fine, he knew better than to try. He also knew he was wasting time by thinking about ways to torture his own brothers.

Forcing himself to stay clearheaded, he slowly let Tig go. Without saying shit as he did, he then started walking inside.

Somewhere deep inside him, he felt himself go numb, slowly. What if he couldn't get her back? For the first time in a real long time, he actually felt afraid of the future.

Grabbing a smoke from his pocked, just to keep his hands busy, he listened to the steps that followed him inside. Besides Chucky asking someone if they needed anything, no one talked.

Once they were all in, leaving the Old Ladies and whoever else was there behind chapel's thick wooden doors, the excruciating silence continued.

Only after everyone had claimed their rightful place behind the reaper-carved table, did the real discussion start. Actually after hearing Clay's 'shit that went down is all on me, I know that, and I'll fix that' on repeat for more than five minutes straight and then some of Jax's hateful bashing at Clay's stupidity in making promises and deals behind club's back, he'd finally had enough.

"I'm going to go search for her," he finally said out loud, itching on his seat to get up. This was taking way too long and who knows how far she'd already gotten.

"Wait. Ain't no point in running around without some sort of a lead," Clay muttered, but instead of it sounding like a command, it came off as a suggestion. "Still nothing on her?" he then turned to Juice.

"Not yet, but I'm quite sure she's out of Charming already. There's no record of her checking into a motel or something," Juice said, making a mistake of throwing a nervous glance towards Hap. He's crow black eyes were surely sending out mind-bullets, and by the way that Juice instantly averted his gaze, those mind-bullets were cutting through just as sharply as real ones.

"What about tickets, could she have gone back to Indian Hills? Did she have any contacts there?" Clay asked.

"Yeah, and what about Jury's crew, she worked for them for a while?" Tig suggested, leaning forward in his chair.

"I doubt she'd go to them. I'd rather try the route of finding out about the people outside the MC world that she could have known there," Jax shook his head.

Happy observed them all in turn, without really listening. As it turned out he knew shit about his almost wife. Well he'd never asked much about people besides the ones he already knew about, but then again she'd never started the conversation either. Actually more than one time she'd made it seem like there hadn't really been anyone outside the MC circle that she'd gotten to know there. Well… actually there was that one whatever his name was rich douche who tried to get with her… Ben something?

"I'm riding out there. I know of a few places to check," Happy stood up. He didn't even bother explaining, besides he was mostly running on a hunch. It was just that he simply couldn't bear the thought of sitting on his ass, doing nothing.

"I get that you… "Clay started, but got cut off midsentence.

"No. I'm going," he growled. This was no more up for a discussion.

"Okay. But not alone.. Tig and Chibs will go with you," Clay nodded, placing a cigar between his lips, "But head out in the morning. At least by then Juice will have, if not a lead, then at least some options ruled out. There's no point in driving out there, wasting your time, if she's not even near Indian Hills."

"I think Clay is right about this, let's wait till morning," Jax finally said on a heavy sigh. His reluctance in forming those words was more than visible.

"Would you wait, if it was Tara?" It was a simple question with a simple answer.

Jax looked at him, he didn't need to even say it out loud that he wouldn't.

"It's not like she's in danger. She's just hurt and… probably hating your guts. It won't get worse if you wait an hour or two."

"You don't know that."

"No, I don't. But there is also no real reason to think differently. Just take a moment. Besides, I'm also working on getting us a bounty hunter, a real good one. So if Juice won't have something by the morning, then he will, I'm sure."

Happy thought about it for a moment. Perhaps they were right, perhaps he'd simply end up killing that Ben-guy without a real reason. Maybe he did need a little more time to make plans, before blindly acting on them.

"Fine."

"Good. Now about the Chinese fuck up…" Clay continued.

Happy listened to most of it, but none of it really mattered, at least not at that moment in time. He didn't even give a rat's ass about getting a satisfying payback for the kidnapping, nor did he care about getting more or less forced into the drug business. There was time to deal with those things later.

As the gavel slammed down, announcing the end of church, Hap bolted out of his chair as if it was suddenly set on fire. He needed to get his bike, and then rush home. He needed to see if she'd even been there. If she'd taken her stuff with her, or if there was a chance she'd just taken some time to think things through before coming back to confront him.

It was a stupid hope, but a tiny part of him was quite violently clinging to it.

"Hap," Gemma motioned him over, standing suspiciously in the shadows next to the boxing ring.

"What?" he said in a rough voice. He was actually going to snap… someone, if this was too going to be about him staying calm and waiting for someone else to come up with a solution to _his_ problem.

"There's something else I think you should know… about Lexi. I wasn't sure you'd like the others to know," Gemma said glancing behind his back.

"What about her?"

"Well… This could totally be nothing. I don't know anything for certain, but… I'm quite sure she's pregnant."

"What?" Happy gaped at her with an open mouth, really hoping he'd heard her wrong.

"I mean she took the test this morning, but we were running late, so... I just think you should be prepared for this, if… once you find her."

Happy stood and looked at Gemma without as much as blinking. This new information… The more he thought about it, about having his pregnant Old Lady running off, because he, whether it was intentional or not, had managed to yet again totally fuck things up for her, the more he felt like suffocation. It wasn't even about him becoming a father, he just felt so god damn guilty.

Through the haze of millions of thoughts running around in his brain, he realized Gemma was still standing there, looking at him, waiting for him so say something. So he did. "Thanks for telling me."

Gemma nodded, reached out her hand, and gently squeezed his shoulder.

He took it as a sign that he was free to turn around and leave.

He had a prospect, who looked like he'd preferred the company of a killer Doberman at that point, drop him off to Jax's house. As Hap gave the dude a slight nod of thank you, the poor guy nearly chocked of relief.

…

He tried real hard to find it as a good sign that his place seemed to be untouched. All of her stuff was still there, right next to his. But somewhere in the back of his mind, he also knew it might mean that she knew they'd eventually try to track her down, and she'd made sure to run off in a hurry. And by that knowingly making the 'tracking her down' part as hard as possible.

And who could even blame her, in her head there was probably nothing keeping her, and their baby, safe from Clay and whoever else anymore.

He dragged his feet to the bed and laid down. His eyelids were heavy, but there was no way he could find sleep that night. He was sure of that, without even trying.

Instinctively his hand reached to the other end of the bed. It was cold and empty, and as he moved his palm up and down underneath the blanket, he found a fucking peanut.

He held it out in front of his eyes like a token, thinking about how much it annoyed him, whenever she decided to sneak food into bed. Though, now looking at it, it didn't make him angry, it only made him remember…

"_Do you wish to sleep in the kitchen, cause that can fucking be arranged," he said, trying to pull the half-eaten pomegranate out of Lexi's grasp. _

_She moved it, so it was out of his reach, "I won't spill, I promise." _

"_You always say that, and then I wake up with a peanut stuck to my forehead," he couldn't help but grin a little, as that had actually happened. She'd called him a nuthead for days after that... and then he'd gotten to spank her for it._

"_Well baby, that's what happens, if you come barging in on my side of the bed," she smirked, biting her lip. _

_She always did this. Whenever she sensed he was getting angry at her, she started seducing him… and it worked liked magic. Always. _

"_Oh yeah, was that a threat?" he yanked her closer. _

_She chuckled, before laying the bowl with her pomegranate on the bedside table. "Maybe."_

"_Tell me more. What would happen if I came barging in on your side of the bed and did this," he too was smirking now, as his hand had moved to rest on her butt cheek. _

"_It depends on what follows. But I'd probably start out by screaming for help, telling you to stop trying to yank down my panties." _

"_Like this?" he pushed the cover off of their bodies to see the red lacy thing that his hand had taken a hold of. _

"_Mhmm," she half-moaned, raising her hips a little to help him roll her underwear down her hips and legs._

_As soon as she was free, he pulled her leg over his hip, and made sure to keep an eye contact while his fingers danced their way to her core. Her warmth around his fingers was making him harden in rapid speed. Not to mention her moans, as she tried to push against his finger, in a desperate attempt to get more friction. _

"_This is heaven," she purred._

_It truly was, there was no doubt about it._

And now the heaven was destroyed.

…

"Do you have it?" Clay asked, getting impatient.

"Yeah. Snatched it from her purse in the airport. Destroyed it," Shadow gave him a nonchalant answer.

"Good. Where's she now?"

"Don't know. Lost them. Tracking them down right now."

"Them?"

"Met up with some girl."

"Do you know who?"

"Working on that too."

"Then get on it."

* * *

Isn't this a quick update? Not even a week! I'm proud of myself. :D

So the other shoe as dropped, now let's get them fighting their way out of this mess!

Would love to hear your ideas!

Thanks for reading!


	40. Loved the way you lied

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of original storylines and characters, or anything else that you might recognize.

* * *

"We're here," Polly said, after what felt like an eternity in that little excuse of a car of hers.

Adjusting to the darkness that had fallen all around them, Lexi made out the forming of what must have been the house they were headed at. Under the starry sky and surrounded by the fluffy coat of perfectly white snow, the place truly came off as something out of a fairytale… though, not entirely a good one.

"So you and your dad live here now?" Lexi got the question out, before Polly had the chance to get out of the car.

"Kinda… We move around a lot," she shrugged.

There was something she wasn't telling. That much was obvious. But as Lexi was still on the receiving end of the helping hand, it was neither the time nor the place to try to unveil well-hidden secrets.

"And your father knows I'm coming, right?"

"Of course," Polly smiled. "You look nervous. Don't be. You're simply visiting your family after all."

"Yeah, I know," Lexi tried to return the smile, but it was must too forced to be believable. She truly was nervous, and had all the right to be.

Until this point she'd pushed all the buttons on a whim, driven by heightened emotions and instincts, but now, as she had finally reached the destination, she really needed to get her head clear. That was all she could think about. What were her intentions? Did she still wish for revenge? Or was she okay with simply having that protective umbrella held over her head?

Speaking of her head, the dull ache that had been there since she'd left the States was now picking up both speed and volume. She ran her fingers through her hair and against her temples in a desperate attempt to rub at least some of the pain out. Sure enough, it didn't really work.

Raking her hands down the tangles that had formed in her hair and looking at the red ends of it resting on her chest, she opened up her mouth, "You don't happen to have hair dye lying around here somewhere, or a portable hair salon?"

"Um. Don't think so, but I'll see what can be done about that. Any color preference?"

"I guess it would be nice to go back to basics. But hey, it's not that important, I mean it's just…"

"A reminder."

"Yeah, something like that."

"It's no problem, might just take a little time. Let's get you all settled in first," Polly said, holding the door open for her.

"Right," Lexi nodded, stepping in to the dimly lit hallway.

"I'll show you around later, there's someone really dying to see you," Polly said, motioning at Lexi to follow her lead.

The hallway leading to the living room was delicately covered with paintings. Though, the messages that those painting were presenting were far from delicate. Let's just say that one did not need to be a genius to realize the racial preferences of the owner.

"Alexandra!"

Lexi could have recognized that voice from anywhere. Without waiting for an answer, he was standing in front of her, raising his hands and cupping her cheeks. "It's been such a long time."

She nodded, as much as was physically possible in the situation where her face was held in captivity.

"Thank you for having me," Lexi squeaked.

"Oh, dear. Of course, you're as if my own daughter," Ethan said, his face warm and friendly.

Lexi smiled, in a bit of a loss of words. Had they not heard anything about her since she'd disappeared from Charming the first time? Did they not know about her connections with the Sons or did they simply not care?

"I'm sure we have a _lot _to discuss, but before that… there's someone else here, eager to see that lovely face of yours."

An image of her father flashed before her eyes. But it could not have been. He was dead. She'd even gotten a confirmation from Hap, at least about it being their doing. But who else-

"Mom?" Lexi felt like the air was kicked out of her lungs.

The last she'd seen her mother, she'd been in high school. According to her father _"She was gunned down by some niggers". _

She'd been devastated, but then again it had also been the kick that had toughened her up and pushed her away from her father the first time. She'd realized that his war with color was truly all-consuming and wrong. There was simply no scenario of everyone coming out of it alive, whether they participated in the act itself or not.

"Lexi," the older woman made a step closer and stopped.

"What? How? You were-" Lexi tried to wrap her head around it, but it was all simply going cloudier by the minute.

"I will tell you everything, I promise," her mother smiled, tears running down her face.

"I can't even believe. Why did you let me think you were dead?" Lexi demanded, unable to decide whether she was happy or angry.

"I'm sorry, sweetie," she made another step closer. "Can I?" she held out her hands.

All she could do was nod. Whether she was angry or happy or crazy, there was only one person in the whole world whose hug had the real magic of making her actually feel a bit better, however bad things were.

Lexi stood still, feeling the warmth of her embrace, inhaling the familiar scent of her perfume, remembering what it felt like before everything in her world got turned upside down.

"You should not have come here." It was a whisper, loud enough only for Lexi's ears.

She had millions of questions, regarding absolutely everything, but the look on her mother's face said that it was definitely not the time.

"You two probably have a lot to catch up on, Polly will show you to your room. And whenever you're ready, come find me, we'll set the plan," Ethan gave them all a smile, only this time it did not reach his eyes.

Somehow the simple word _plan_ managed to say all about his knowledge on her and the sons… Or she was simply reading too much into everything. Oh god, suddenly it was all she hoped for… for him to know nothing about her involvement with the sons.

…

"I don't know where to start," Lexi said, slumping down on the bed, looking at her mother for answers.

The look on Tessa's face was soft, yet worried.

"You're so beautiful," she smiled, sitting down too.

"Where have you been? Why did dad lie to me?"

"All in good time, honey, let's talk about you first, what happened?" Tessa asked, reaching for Lexi's hand.

She wanted to protest, tell her that she owed her those answers, but then again she really did need to get at least some of what had happened out of her head.

"Oh, the usual. Girl meets a boy, she falls in love, boy leaves her at the altar, his brothers want her dead… And do you know what the worst thing about it is? The worst thing is remembering that there once was a time when I feared that true love would never come… and yet here I am now, frightened to death thinking it will come again."

"Oh sweetie, come here."

She hadn't even realized the tears that had started falling the second she'd opened her mouth. Nor had she acknowledged the state of exhaustion consuming her body. Trembling and crying in her mother's arms like a little child, they both finally fell quiet.

"No-one will ever hurt you again," her mother pulled away from the hug, raisin both of Lexi's hands to her mouth and giving them a kiss.

Lexi's eyes focused on the ring her mother was still wearing, it looked ancient, it probably was. It had surely been passed down for generations.

The sight of that made her remember yet another ring, passed down generations.

_It had been days since they announced their engagement, and it had been hectic. Planning a wedding in such sort span of time, it was crazy. _

_And Happy, not that surprisingly, was no help. Every question she had regarding details was answered with a grunt and a "yeah, sounds good". _

_So it was an actual surprise when he gave her a call in the middle of the day. _

"_Where are you right now?" _

"_At Gemma's, working on flower arrangements." _

"_Stay there," he ended the call._

"_Okay… Bye honey," Lexi said to no-one and rolled her eyes. _

_He got there rather quickly, the familiar roar of Harley's announcing his arrival. _

_Gemma squinted her eyes, watching Lexi storm to the door, but let it slide. _

"_Damn, I thought you were the pizza guy," Lexi tried to act disappointed. _

"_Ate the pizza, scared the guy off. I'll send you the bill." _

"_What if I don't have any money?"_

"_Then we have a problem." _

"_Oh no. Sir, is there another way to pay?" Lexi asked, all too caught up in the banter to even register Gemma walking up to them. _

"_You guys really planning on fucking in my doorway?" Gemma smirked, raising an eyebrow. _

"_No," Lexi shook her head. She couldn't be sure, as she was looking at Gemma, but she thought she heard Happy say "Yes". _

"_Well… I'll pretend I believe you," Gemma winked at Lexi, before turning her attention to Hap. "Did something happen?"_

"_Neh. Quiet day, thought I'd spend it with my Old Lady." _

"_Really?" Lexi eyed him suspiciously. "Cause we ain't going home to stay in bed the whole day, if that's what you're implying. I've got shit to do." _

"_Like what?" _

"_Like arrange the wedding. Go to the fitting, meet the caterers, do some light shopping… so on."_

"_Alright, I'll take you." _

"_Did he just volunteer to go shopping?" Lexi turned her questioning gaze to Gemma. _

"_I don't know, it doesn't look like he's hit his head, but maybe I should check with Clay just in case?"_

"_Okay, enough you two, let's go, babe," Happy grunted, obviously not enjoying being made fun of. _

"_Yeah, fine. See you later for dinner, Gem," Lexi grinned, picking up her purse and following Happy outside. _

"_Hey, wait up for a second," Lexi skipped after him. _

_He turned just in time to catch her with his hands. _

"_Just wanted to say that I am following you, BUT if you stop in some dark alley to have a quickie, I will drive on without blinking. I mean it, I have a lot to do today."_

"_Leave the car here," he said, dipping down to steal a quick kiss. _

"_No. And it wouldn't change a thing." _

"_Fine. Besides you'll have to lead anyways, I've got no idea where those shopping places and whatnot are."_

"_You don't? Really? Man, you're so full of surprises today," she mocked. _

"_Gemma will not like me hauling you over my knee in her front yard, so don't tempt me, for her sake." _

_She chuckled. "Well, if you say so. Let's get this party on the road." _

_She could see it in his face, he did not like following her around from shop to shop, so much in fact that at one point she even felt sorry for him. But then again he'd brought it on himself. _

"_You know you don't have to be here. I won't mind if you go do your thing." _

_He really thought about it for a while. _

"_Really, you can go," she smiled and pulled him down for a quick peck, "besides you're actually more like slowing me down than helping."_

"_Let's stay at home tonight," he finally said gazing at her with a weird look in his eyes. _

"_It's Friday... Nothing going on in the clubhouse?" Lexi asked, unsure what to make of that abrupt suggestion. _

"_I don't know... probably is. But I want to stay home with you," his voice sounded a bit nervous, which in association made her feel nervous. _

"_Why?" _

"_Just. So you gonna cancel your plans with Gemma or not?" he was getting impatient. _

"_Um.. Yeah, okay." _

"_Okay. See you later then," he turned around and started walking toward the exit, leaving her to stare at the reaper on his back. _

_He was acting beyond weird. _

…

_Finally, around six o'clock, she made it home. His bike was already sitting in the driveway. _

_She opened up the door, only to feel like falling back out of it. There were candles everywhere, actually so many candles that she even felt like moving a few that might have otherwise flamed up the whole house. _

"_Did we forget to pay for electricity?" she asked out loud, although Happy was nowhere to be seen. _

_She dropped her purse and other bags and moved further into the house. "Hap?"_

"_Her eyes moved from Happy standing in the bedroom doorway, to the table in the living room. Her eyes took in the wine and sushi placed neatly on it… wait, sushi? "Sushi?" she wondered out loud. _

"_And candles and everything... what's going on?" _

"_Don't know how to do this romantic shit… but I thought you might like something fancier than pizza and beer," he almost looked ashamed. _

"_Oh my… Happy. I love it. Everything. This is so not you, but I love it nonetheless." _

"_And as this all won't get cold, I thought you might want to take a bath before…" _

"_Definitely," she walked up to him, running her hand up his chest until they were resting on his shoulders, "thank you for doing all this."_

_He did not smile nor speak. He simply looked at her, as if he was really seeing her clearly for the first time. "For you I would do anything." _

"_I know. Me too," she smiled, feeling like her heart was about to burst. _

"_And does that 'I would do anything' also include helping me out of these clothes?" _

"_Definitely."_

_He took his time stripping her form head to toe, in the meanwhile giving her trembling skin occasional feather light kisses. _

"_Let me," she caught his hand, as he moved on to his own clothing. _

_Lexi started straight off from his pants. Freeing his already half-way hard member, she closed her fingers around it, while fondling his balls with the other hand. _

_The low moan escaping his lips made her speed things up. She ran her tongue up and down his length, before closing her lips around him completely. His hips rocked slightly, matching the movement of her mouth. _

_After a while she could tell he was getting close. As he tugged on her shoulder, she looked up. There was almost a begging look in his eyes. With a grin of a winner, she stood up, letting him push her against the wall, before picking her up._

_She was already wet enough for him to push in with ease. _

_They started up against the wall, slowly and lovingly, but ended up on the floor, Lexi on all fours, screaming out nonsense as he fucked her as hard as he could. _

_She felt him emptying himself inside her, his juiced dripping down her legs. Before pulling out, he reached under her, making her come for the second time that evening. _

_She was exhausted, wanting to actually stay on that floor and fall asleep, but a set of strong hands picked her up. "I owe you a bath."_

"_I vaguely remember, and yes, I'd still love to take you up on that offer." _

"_Like you had a choice," he put her down and climbed in. _

"_Hey now… be nice. You've done good so far." _

"_Get in," he commanded, spreading his legs to make room for her between them. _

_They sat there in silence, fingers gently stroking each other. _

_Silently he trailed his hand down her arm, pulling it out from underneath the water. _

_She didn't even pay specific attention to it, until she felt something getting jammed onto her finger. _

"_I owed you that too."_

_For a long moment she was completely in loss of words. _

"_Is that.. your mother's?" _

"_Yeah." _

"_I can't have this right now," she started to remove it from her finger, but couldn't finish her task, feeling how tense he got behind her back. _

_She managed to flip herself around to face him. "Don't get me wrong. I'm taking this and I can't wait to wear it, but I want you to give it to me at the altar. Not as an engagement ring."_

_Slowly he nodded, understanding her reasoning._

"_But I am going to hold onto it for the evening, if that's okay with you. Practice makes perfect and all that shit." _

"_You already are perfect," he pulled her closer with a relief-filled smile. "I love you." _

"_And I love you," she kissed her way up his scruffy chin to his lips. He responded, battling for control. _

"_Why did you give it to me in a bathtub?" she couldn't help but wonder, pulling her head away from him to see his eyes._

"_I remember being in a bathtub with you in Nevada, that was the first time I felt peace like I'd never felt before, even if it was just for a fleeting moment… as I held you there, I felt complete. It was like I was able to finally let out the breath I'd been holding my whole life."_

"_I feel complete with you, too. Like a motorcyclist who has finally found his perfect Harley." _

_With a raspy laugh, he grabbed her ass, pressing her down on his lap. _

…

Another stream of tears ran down her cheeks. It was a memory she'd done her best to avoid, and it had worked, at least until this point.

"I'm so sorry. For everything," her mother said, tears glistening in her eyes.

Lexi wiped her cheek with the back of her hand. She needed to get her head back from Charming, she couldn't allow herself to remember _him_ like that. After all, all he'd said that night had been a lie. He never did love her, or he would have never done what he did.

She needed something else to occupy her mind.

"What did you mean before, with the 'you should not have come here'?" she asked instead.

Tessa looked around nervously, shaking her head.

* * *

Happy Valentine's Day!

I thought I'd add something sweet to the mix, hope you enjoyed it.


	41. Familiar taste of poison

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of original storylines and characters, or anything else that you might recognize.

* * *

_**In Budapest**_

There was a silent knock on the door. "Lexi?" Polly's voice came from the other side.

"Yeah?" Lexi shot up wiping her cheeks with the back of her hand, before walking up to the door and opening it.

"I'm heading out for a minute, I thought I'd pick up that hair dye you wanted. Blonde it is then?" Polly smiled, throwing a quick glance inside the room.

"Yeah. Thanks, Pol."

"Sure, no problem. Oh and father is waiting for you, whenever you're ready."

"Mmhm," Lexi mumbled with a nod. She was so not ready. Not even close to ready. Was she ever going to be ready? Ready to make decisions with no do-over possibilities, that is.

"Tessa, you need something?" Polly asked, eyeing Lexi's mother.

"No, thank you, dear," Tessa shook her head.

"Okay then, see you guys later," Polly smiled again, before turning on her heels.

Lexi waited patiently until Polly had moved out of her sight, before finally shutting the door. Since the moment her mother's words had filled her ears, she'd been suspicious of everything… as well as everyone. Why should she not have come here?

"Where can we talk freely?" Lexi soundlessly mouthed to Tessa.

Her mother thought about it for a second, before pointing to the window. "Outside," she mouthed back.

…

_**In Charming**_

"What do you mean you still have nothing? I'm paying a shitload of money for this bogus information," Clay nearly squeezed the cigar between his fingers into two.

"I tracked down the car again, but the target was not in it. Only the other one," Shadow's voice sounded muffled.

"And who the fuck is the other one? And I still need those fucking pictures of her," Clay said, glancing over his shoulder to make sure that no-one had secretly entered the chapel.

"Not sure, yet. And I'm handling it."

"I'm going to tell you this once, so listen close. If you don't have anything useful by this evening, I'm gonna…"

"I'mma stop you there, I do not respond well to threats. Besides, I am seconds away from getting to the bottom of this. I will contact you later."

With that the English sounding bastard had ended the call.

Clay felt like throwing the phone against the wall, but since nothing was supposed to look out of the ordinary, he fought well to remain his calm. Without a doubt, there were eyes on him. He'd practically felt Jax's suspicious gaze following his every move, ever since he'd told the big lie.

But he also knew that it wasn't just Jax he had to worry about. Happy was also on edge, more rattled than he'd ever seen him before, but then again, in Clay's mind at least Hap's eyes were much too clouded with fury to actually figure shit out. For all he knew, Happy was simply watching him to get the information he had promised to give. However, there wasn't much to give at this point, not even fake one.

"Clay?" Jax entered the chapel.

"What?" Clay turned to look at him.

"I think we should reach out to other charters, get them here."

"For what?"

Jax squinted his eyes. "For help?"

"There ain't nothing they can help us with, if there ain't no leads. And I'm already working on it. We'll have something by this evening."

"Not sure Hap can wait that long without murdering one of us."

"Well, I guess he'll just have to do," Clay got up and marched past Jax.

As he got out of the chapel, he was nearly run over by Happy. "Did you hear something?"

"No. But I will, soon. Until then get out of here, clear your head," Clay suggested.

"No."

"Fine. Suit yourself, but Hap, if you at one point start raging in here, we're gonna have a problem," Clay said, patting on Hap's shoulder.

…

_**In Budapest**_

As they got outside, Lexi finally felt free to talk. Even without her mother's words, there was something suspicious in the air that filled Zobelle's house.

"I'm so fricking confused. Where have you been all these years?" Lexi inquired as they made their way to a bench.

"You won't like what I have to say, but you deserve to hear the truth," Tessa eyed her shoes.

"Just tell me." Not like there was much anyone could have said that would have surprised her at that point.

"It started way back in the day. You were growing up so fast, but whatever we did or told you, you always had your own mind about things. You're reluctance to embrace the mission was quite astonishing, especially considering the people you were surrounded by when growing up. So one day me and your father… we figured there was only one way to really get you to understand," Tessa had fallen quieter as her speech continued.

"It wasn't like we deliberately wanted to hurt you, of course not. And it did hurt us both more than you could even imagine, but at that moment in time, it really did feel like the only way to go forward. So we decided to give you a reason to feel as passionately about the mission as we did. Long story short, this is how you became to know that I'd been murdered by black people, murdered in revenge against our race."

"I can't even.. will this madness ever stop? How could you have possibly thought that it was a good idea? Oh my god, this is so fucked up. Not really surprising at this point in my life, but still… fucking unbelievable," Lexi was holding on to her forehead. What else was there for life to throw in her face? Like really?

"Alexandra, I'm telling you all this not because I've changed my mind on the racial topic in general, but because during these last few months I've finally realized that the way the Leagues has been going at it… it's deadly and destructive for all parts involved, and it for sure ain't right. What started out as a mission from God quickly turned into a stupid battle for money and dominance. Basically what's left of all of that now is simply violence… and I don't want that for you. And I'm so sorry for my foolishness affecting your life the way it has."

Tessa tried to take Lexi's hand, but Lexi pulled it away.

"I'm so sorry, but that is the brutal truth and if you don't get out of this life, it will only get worse, you should have never come here."

"Like I wanted to… I simply had nowhere else to go. I needed… I still need help," Lexi threw a quick glance in her way.

"You don't understand, whatever they say, they won't _help_ you. They'll only use you," Tessa said, now forcefully grabbing Lexi's hand. "I'm begging you to listen to me."

"Okay, if that's true, then tell me why are _you_ here, especially if you're telling me all this. If you truly think that coming here was such a mistake?"

"Because I too had nowhere else to go … however when I finally realized that coming here wasn't the solution, but more like digging your own grave, it was already too late for me to change anything. But Alexandra, it's not too late for you."

It was a moment she felt like breaking apart all over again. It was already too late for her, too. Her mother was wrong.

"I'm not stupid, I already know what Ethan is capable of… for god sake, I know what dad was capable of. I… I just need protection," Lexi finally said, looking back at the house.

"Darling, I don't think you understand. The whole time I've been here, Ethan has tried to get me into contacting you. As far as I know, you've always been the number one player in their revenge plan- whatever it exactly is, I don't know. So one way or another, you won't get protection, you'll only get thrown into to the ocean as a bait. You've been safe so far only cause I've managed to post-phone reaching out to you, by saying that I needed more time to learn about you-"

"Wait? Learn about me?" Lexi interrupted.

"Yes. Let's just say that they kept an eye on you… as well as on those around you. Actually, I was so close to getting a word out to you, to warn you, when on one unfortunate day you contacted Polly yourself. I instantly knew it much have been bad, but as I was not that necessary anymore, they decided to keep me out of loop about what exactly had gone wrong back there. All they did say was that you were on your way here. So I played along, simply hoping that it was some kind of a mistake, that you weren't actually going to show up. Played along with their game just like I had been doing from the day I realized what a mistake it was to come here," there were tears in Tessas's eyes, "You see, I can't leave. I haven't given it a try, but I'm more than sure, that if I did, I'd leave in a bag."

They both fell silent for a moment.

"Lexi, you however, now that you're here, but not yet chained here… you just have to safely play yourself out of Ethan's game. Although, I'm not sure what it is, or what you'll have to do, I am more than sure that it will be your only chance."

"This is insane. All this is insane. I've-. I just . Aarghh. When will it be enough? I mean I've sure had enough. Enough with this shit. All of it. You know what? You've just put it so perfectly- all my life I've been playing a part in someone else's game. Since the day I was born. ENOUGH. No more. This is going to end."

It was a moment of clarity. She might have been broken into pieces, but those pieces still belong to her to control.

_I need to cut ties with absolutely everyone. Including her. _

"I've got no right to say this to you, but I love you. I'll help you out of this mess, whatever it takes. You can count on me… No, actually don't count on me. You're right, never more. Never count on anyone again. At least, not on anyone from this life- you're still young, go somewhere far away, start your life over, find happiness that I and everyone else around you have wrongfully taken from you. Promise me that you will."

"Oh, I will," Lexi finally felt like the women she'd always wanted to be. A women in control.

Again they fell silent.

"We should get back in soon. What are we going to do with Zobelle's? Tessa finally broke the silence, gawking at the guy guarding the front door.

"I can't tell you."

"Right, you shouldn't," her mother nodded.

"No, not only cause I shouldn't, although that is true, too, as in you're right and I should only count on myself from now on… but it's also cause I've yet to figure it out. I need to first hear out Ethan's plan. Enough with me acting on emotions, if I'm going to get away from this life once and for all, I really need to think about every single detail like my life depended on it.. cause it probably does depend on it," Lexi said, pushing herself off of the bench.

"You'll need money," Tessa said, standing up as well.

"I know. I'll figure it out," Lexi started heading back towards the house, but abruptly turned around, "Mother?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you for the honesty."

"Thank me by safely disappearing without a trace."

"Yeah… let's just hope that I'll achieve that without someone _else_ erasing that trace from behind me."

"You will."

_Or I'll die trying._

* * *

I've been so bad at updating my stories these past few months that it's really embarrassing.

And I am sorry!

But I do hope you liked this one… Not to spoil, but I'd call this chapter a turning point. ;)

And as always, thank you so much for reading. Feel free to let me know what you think.


	42. This war is mine

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of original storylines and characters, or anything else that you might recognize.

AN: This has been abandoned for way too long… again. For that I'm truly sorry. This past year has been crazy and I just haven't had the time, ideas or energy. Again, please forgive me.

Also I'd like to publicly reply to a… well, let's call it a question. :D _"__When u wait to post so long we lose interest. I don't even remember what the story was about. Why even bother_?"

I totally understand why these gaps between updates are annoying. Sorry! And I also realize that some readers might have given up on this story altogether. Well, this is truly my bad. I get that. However there's still a strong reason to _why I even bother. _As much as this is for all of you to read and hopefully enjoy, this is also for me. And I hate leaving things unfinished, so even if at this point no-one even remembers what this story is about, then I'd still want it to be finished at one point. So that is why _I _bother. I bother myself FOR myself as much as I do it for you guys. Not that writing this even is a bothering activity for me really, I still enjoy it, I just have a hard time getting to it.

Anyways, let's get to it. Hope you enjoy if you've gotten this far.

* * *

**Little recap:**

Lexi thinks Happy left her at the altar, when in reality it was all just Clay's ploy to kill two birds with one stone- to get the cartel deal passed by the club and to finally get rid of Lexi. Basically he got Chinese to kidnap Hap and Jax on the wedding day. After getting the text message from "Happy" saying that he was sorry, Lexi took off in search for the only people she thought could offer her some protection - Zobelles.

Now she's in Budapest, having found out that her mother is actually alive, and trying to cope with the fact that her whole life has been a lie and there's not a single person in the whole world that she can truly trust. Trying not to let it be the end of her, she has finally decided to actually take charge, while still not knowing that Clay was behind all that went down in Charming, and he's not done with her just yet by having someone out there trying to tie up loose ends.

…

**In Charming**

"That's the bitch Lexi's been in contact with?" Clay demanded. The moment he'd seen the picture Shadow had sent him, he knew it was bad.

"Yes. Polly Zobelle. I am eyeing the woman right now."

"She's with Lexi? You listen to me, this thing needs to be taken care of right now." Not only was Clay furious, this new information had brought him to the point of fear. He'd never even considered the possibility of Lexi reaching out to Zobelles. It was one thing for him to be generous enough to let her stay alive and a whole other to let her bring in other players, especially as dangerous as Zobelles were. No. Lexi's death verdict had arrived just like that.

"No. Zobelle's alone. I'm going to follow her back. Guessing that's where the target is staying," Shadow's voice was hushed.

Clay could hear cars passing by on the other end of the line.

"I don't care. Just do it. Take her out. Take them all out," he muttered, having made the final decision. Well, all things considered, this new information didn't really leave much of a choice.

"You Americans do know that people don't usually do charity work? You may consider the initial target dead, but those others are not my concern, unless of course they get in my way on their own."

"Fine. Just get it done... I'm still gonna need pictures of her, preferably in a way that presents the death as a suicide," Clay said, seeing others come into the clubhouse through the chapel window.

"Consider it done."

With that the conversation was over and all he could do was wait and hope for it all to work out.

…

**In Budapest**

"You're gonna need to talk to Ethan," her mother said as they were heading back inside.

"I know. But I need some time to make up a plan. I can't go in there to face him without having made up my mind on how to go on," Lexi nodded, looking down at her feet.

She tried to shake off the voice in her head demanding her to just make a run for it. But that would only work as a temporary solution. She was in a need of a permanent one.

"Do you know what time it is?" Lexi turned to Tessa.

"Around dinner time, I think," she answered looking at the grey sky.

As they walked, Lexi felt like Tessa was trying to say something several times, but stopped herself.

"What is it?" Lexi finally blurted out.

"That man of yours… would you ever go back to him, if he like admitted his mistake and came knocking on your door? I mean I just think that it could be a strong game changer you should really work out inside your head, before making any real decisions," Tessa said, looking at Lexi with a familiar sadness in her eyes.

"No. He moved that relationship into a place beyond repair. There is no going back. It's done for good."

An image of Happy flashed by her eyes and it made her cringe.

Tessa nodded, "I know life's a bit dark now, Alexandra, but it will get better soon. I'm sure. You just have to carry on without looking back."

Lexi smiled at her, but the emotion didn't reflect from her eyes.

"I guess we'll see."

…

A little while later Lexi had found her way to her room. She took a moment to sit down and plan her next step. It was going to have to be a big one, one way or another.

After talking to her mother she was more than sure that nothing here was what she had hoped for. It wasn't her way out of hell, it was a more like a highway into even deeper and darker despair. The thought of needing to get out of Zobelle's, as well as anyone else's, radar kept rolling in her head… As they say 'Out of sight, out of mind'.

Now the biggest obstacle, besides being more or less locked up yet again, was not having money necessary for getting out of the country… like far-far away. And it wasn't like she was going to have the chance to pick up an extra shift at the local diner.

If only she knew someone sitting on a chamber of gold… if only she was staying with someone rich enough to keep himself and her daughter alive and well hidden, after basically being run out of the States. Oh wait, she was.

There was an explosion of ideas running through her head, one worse than the other, until she finally got a hold of something that would idealistically work.

There was no way Ethan was going to just lend her the money to disappear. That was sure. Also there probably was no way he was planning on letting her leave, with or without money, at least not before whatever he had planned with her had been carried out.

But then again, having learned it from her father long ago, she also knew that guys like these always had a fair share of cash lying around close by, it being a quick solution in case of having the need to quickly get under the radar or something. So there was no doubt in her mind that this mansion was too hiding a little bank vault with money she really needed to… borrow.

Now the other thing, besides finding and cracking the safe, was getting away without anyone instantly on her back. She needed a good head start before anyone would come searching for her, and surely they would, but that was a problem for her future self.. So the only way of achieving that little simple green-light to go was probably by having Ethan personally send her away alone, with a smile and encouragement on his face, basically with that being more or less _his _idea. Well, _his _idea… that she was going to deviously plant inside his head.

So basically what she needed to do was:

1\. Find out where Zobelles kept their money.

2\. Take what she needed in order to disappear forever

3\. Convince Ethan to send her out on the world all alone and unfollowed.

Easy, breezy… right? Well it probably wasn't going to be, but at least she had some sort of a plan. So now it all depended on her ability to carry it out.

And wherever this was going to lead her, it was surely going to be better than whatever fate was trying to throw in her way.

…

**2 days later in Charming:**

"I have eyes on the house where the target is staying," Shadow called, his voice giving out no emotions.

"And what's the next move?" Clay asked.

"Find a way in and take the girl. The rest is up to you to decide."

"Good. Take her to some cheap hotel, make it a believable suicide, leave the body. Later get the official pictures from the local police and send them my way," Clay said in a low voice.

"As you wish."

* * *

Again sorry for the lack of updates!

Also thank you for reading and let me know what you think/ hope!


	43. Woman of intention

Disclaimer: Claiming no ownership of original storylines and characters, or anything else that you might recognize.

* * *

She could not prolong the inevitable for that much longer, nor did she want to. Staying under the same roof with people like Zobelles, especially after realizing that they were being so exceptionally nice only for their own twisted motives, was making her nervous.

"Alexandra, can we talk now?" Ethan asked, stopping Lexi from entering the dining room.

She was a bit taken by surprise, as she had not even noticed him exit his office.

"I…I figured we'd talk after dinner… but um yeah sure." She must have looked like a deer caught in the headlights.

Whether he noticed it too or not, Ethan simply motioned her to follow him without saying much.

Her nerves were now really starting to kick in. This was it. This was her one and only chance.

"Have a seat," Ethan smiled, sitting down opposite to her.

"Can I just say something first?" Lexi asked, starting just as she had prepared earlier.

"Yes. Of course!"

"I wanted to thank you… for taking me in, for… everything. I don't know what I would have done without your help," she lied like she'd never lied before. And much to her surprise, it even came out sounding quite sincere. "I was just so lost and _angry_," she continued, emphasizing on the anger part cause that was her way in. She needed to make him believe that she was out for vengeance, just as he was, even if the only thing she really wished for was simply to get the hell out of this mess.

He nodded. "You have always been a part of this family, Alexandra, and there's not a thing I wouldn't do for my family."

It was her turn to smile. So far it was going perfectly. Just as she had hoped it would. He was following the script, he hadn't even seen.

"Getting tangled up with the Sons… it was like they brainwashed me, I just couldn't see straight… right until I had used up my purpose for them and I knew I had to run," she said, fighting with herself to hold his gaze. She couldn't let her eyes wonder around now, yelling out loud that she was full of shit.

He leaned forward on his desk, "Those people… they are the root of all evil."

She nodded. "How did I not see it before?"

"Sometimes love blinds us…"

"Yeah.. but that's the thing. I don't think I ever really did love _him. _I just felt safe under his protection, or at least had this illusion of safety. Not to say that the thing he did… didn't hurt me, just that I'm now starting to see things that I didn't see before."

"He should pay for what he did to you," Ethan had balled his fingers into a fist.

"I'm just so _angry_… and not just because of him. Clay and those others… ever since they kidnapped me, I've been in constant danger and I'm so sick of it, sick of them getting away just like that from absolutely everything… from what they did to me, to you and Polly… from killing dad." She acted as if she was out of breath.

"Come here," Ethan had stood up.

Lexi rose too and met him half-way. Truth to say, his hug made her want to vomit. Or maybe it was all the lying going on in that room.

"I want to hurt them… like they hurt us," she whispered, not letting go of him.

He remained quiet, considering her words. "Are you sure?"

Lexi took a step back, wiping the single angry tear she had managed to push out. "And I want my face to be the last thing they see."

"Dear," he looked her straight in the eye, "If you are sure about this."

Yeah right. As if that was not the thing he had been planning this whole time.

He truly was one hell of an actor, but apparently so was she. She knew she needed to look him in the eyes with all seriousness and give him one clear nod.

"Why don't we talk about specifics after the dinner?" he suggested, looking at the clock.

"Okay. But again, I'm so grateful for everything you and Polly have done for me... and my mother," she smiled, touching Ethan's hand.

"No need to thank me, I'm just glad I can help," his smile was as bright as it was fake.

…

Most of the dinner they ate in silence, well besides Tessa's occasional chit chat about things that had no real importance.

Lexi squeezed the fork between her fingers, feeling the cold. Nothing here was warm, and she was missing the sun that never seemed to set in Charming.

"Sorry I'm late… felt like someone was following me, had to drive around for some time before coming here," Polly said as she pulled out a chair and sat down.

"Did you recognize the person?" Ethan asked from the head of the table.

"No. A regular black sedan, just that it kept turning where I was turning. I don't know, maybe I was paranoid," she shrugged.

"Always better safe than sorry," Ethan agreed.

Lexi eyed Polly with suspicion. "Sure you managed to lose it?"

"Yea-yeah, don't worry about it," Polly said half-heartedly.

"Uh-huh."

"You are safe here," Ethan too tried to reassure her.

Lexi nodded, praying in her head that all of her big plans weren't about to blow up in flames with someone uninvited barging in. For a moment it was as if her body was in one place and her mind in another, picturing how she'd react if Sons including Happy would come in guns blazing.

_Nope and nope. _She mentally checked herself.

After they were all done eating, Lexi followed Ethan back to his office, hoping that Polly wouldn't be included in their conversation. Gladly she wasn't. There was simply no way of knowing what that loose cannon was possible of stirring up, and she already had her hands full with dear Pol's daddy.

"Do you have any suggestions on how to handle our biker-situation?" Zobelle looked at her as he adjusted his sleeves.

"No.. I mean, what are the possibilities? I just wouldn't want anything to blow up in our own faces," she felt heat creeping through her spine. _Easy now. _

"Certainly wouldn't want that," he agreed.

Lexi stared at Ethan, not really sure of how to play her cards right. She almost had him, but then again not quite.

"Would you like a drink?" he offered out of the blue.

"Um. Sure."

"I was thinking about something permanent, so that there would not be anyone left to search for revenge…" he suggested.

She could feel the carefulness of his words. Was he testing her? Or was he simply assuming she'd back down at some point?

She emptied the glass he'd offered her, "I think I agree."

"You think?"

"No.. I do… I do agree," she stood up with confidence. "That's the only way I'd ever truly feel redeemed and safe… and I think I have an idea."

"I'm listening."

"What if.. I mean I could probably get them all together in one place without it being too suspicious, without them being on alert. I doubt they'd shoot me at sight in their clubhouse. They'd do it secretly… but I would be long gone before that and League's guys would get inside just like that, ending that miserable Biker-Kingdom for once and for all."

"You would just walk in like nothing happened and then walk out?" he looked doubtful.

"I would go in offering them some sort of a deal, I'd figure it out in the process…"

"And you'd be brave enough to do all that? Truly?"

"I have nothing left to lose, only to gain," that was the first true thing she'd said in a long while.

"No. I can't let you go in alone, too dangerous," he shook his head.

"No, that's the only way they would ever trust me. I have to go alone. I'm quite sure that even to the States I should go alone, they might have eyes on me."

"I don't know if that's a good idea."

"I actually really do think it is. Just that if something starts to feels fishy, I'll get out, and we'll think of something else. Now the only real question is, whether or not I would have League to back me up in Charming once it all goes down?"

"That won't be a problem."

"You sure? Cause if yes, then let's do it."

There was a long silence, before Ethan finally let out a breath. "Fine. I'll set it up."

"I'm thinking like a week to prepare everything?" she suggested.

After all, she did need the time to search around for the money she needed to get under everyone's radar… or things would end really-really badly for absolutely everyone. There was no way she'd go back to Charming ever again, nor would she ever organize a massacre. She simply needed the time to find the money and a little bit of luck to get a good head start… luck as in forgetting to get on the right plane, and instead buying a ticket to a place from where she'd never be found.

"Yes. You should go get some sleep, we'll figure out the details tomorrow."

"Sounds good. Again thank you so much and good night!"

"Good night, dear."

Lexi felt her heart slow down its rapid beating once she was outside the door. Was she getting played by him, or did everything actually for once go according to the plan?

One way or another, she was beyond exhausted.

**2 days later:**

He stuffed the phone back into his pocket, watching the moon cast its shadows on the mansion. This job had taken an embarrassingly long time, but it was about to end. He made his way over the fence and past the guard who was busy having his eyes glued to the screen of his phone. "Imbecile," Shadow muttered to himself.

Usually he liked to enter from one of the second floor windows, but considering how ice cold and slippery the wall looked, he decided against it. This winter-thing was getting on his nerves altogether, not that he wasn't used to it, hell he had experienced a fair share of it, growing up in London and all that, but still. It just so often made easy tasks unnecessarily difficult… for example trying not to create a perfect trail behind him as he made his way through the snow.

Once he was inside, it was already much easier. Now he just had to find the right room. So putting on his night-time-vision glasses, he started looking.

…

The first thing Lexi heard was someone really carefully closing the door behind them.

It took her another moment to register that someone had entered the room.

* * *

Thank you for reading!

I was really-really pleased to see that there actually are some people out there who haven't totally forgotten about this story. Yay! So I'm trying to get back on track. :)


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